- 170
- 114
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2020
elevate yourself and you'll find these "old" friends of yours start becoming enemies.
boom shaka laka
- Thread in 'General' Thread starter Started by amiricollector,
- Start date
elevate yourself and you'll find these "old" friends of yours start becoming enemies.
- 14,576
- 16,992
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2012
Qft
- 170
- 114
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2020
no doubt. and i agree. life is tough as it is. surrounding yourself around happy people bring hope and joy in their lives.
Certainly that is a self reflection for me. I am not happy with my current life, so that might bleed into it.
- 30,464
- 33,758
- Joined
- Jan 8, 2006
I grew into a different person than a lot of my high school/early year friends.
By the time I hit 20/21 everyone I was hanging out with were new people that aligned with my interests/hobbies more, some met through moving out for college, other friends of friends that I thought would be cool to kick it with and now we're like family.
At this point I have a handful of people I don't have a ton in common with as well but just enjoy their company. Juggling so many people can be overwhelming at times but I also have no probably disconnecting socially for periods of time and just chilling at the house and doing nothing, not that I have much options at the moment.
- 24,028
- 23,125
- Joined
- Jan 29, 2013
Can you show us your jeans collection
- 14,576
- 16,992
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2012
Quality of life. It’s a subject many are pondering. Read up on maslows hon.. when you learn how not to argue, life seems a lil more chill
- 170
- 114
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2020
I wasn't arguing. It's just I feel like I'm dealing with a lot of trolls and I can't even open up an honest conversation with people telling me to " give my gay friend a chance" etc etc. Like how is that even relevant to this topic?
now you have this dude telling me to show him my jean collection. Like dude- there are plenty of threads to go and find your short-lived entertainment. This isn't the place especially when you have other viewers watching this thread for advice.
now you have this dude telling me to show him my jean collection. Like dude- there are plenty of threads to go and find your short-lived entertainment. This isn't the place especially when you have other viewers watching this thread for advice.
- 24,028
- 23,125
- Joined
- Jan 29, 2013
Mans posted a vulnerable topic on a forum where dudes still collect Nike and Jordan sneakers. What did you expect
- 170
- 114
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2020
it's in the general topic for a reason. if these people want to go to jordan, nike newbalance, air max, there's a WHOLE section there.
yeah, we might all share similar interest in sneakers, but we are all human at the end of the day with real emotion, with real problems. the general lounge should be a place for us to freely talk about it. If troll is all you want there are so many OTHER threads.
yeah, we might all share similar interest in sneakers, but we are all human at the end of the day with real emotion, with real problems. the general lounge should be a place for us to freely talk about it. If troll is all you want there are so many OTHER threads.
- 14,576
- 16,992
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2012
Lol... internet is undefeated. Gotta roll with the punches. That’s what friends do
- 30,464
- 33,758
- Joined
- Jan 8, 2006
When the fires hit here this year, my phone blew up from friends asking me if I need to stay at their house/need a place to store my things/need anything. I lived with one of them for half a month and kept my **** there until it was safe by my house.
Whenever anything bad in my life has happened and I didn't reach out, those same people reached out to me and sent me things/visited without me asking because they cared. 2 months into quarantine my homegirl sent me a letter with a bunch of scratchers and a chain.
Hell, there's NT'ers that check on me in my DMs on a regular basis to ask if I'm doing ok and see how everything is going on in my life because I had a few really bad incidents happen to me this year.
I've had friends drive 20 miles to help me with car trouble.
I don't know why you're so set on everyone else's friendships being "phony" and that because you have quantity it can't equate to quality.
I'm very picky about the people I keep close to me but there's also so many people out there in the world and I'm a social person and I enjoy those relationships. You don't have to have a ton of friends but you've come off as bitter in some of these posts.
Just try to be positive when interacting with people and that energy will draw people to you, and put yourself out there/make yourself approachable. And be able to take a joke.
- 5,891
- 12,009
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2016
making friends is not a lot different from attracting women...if you radiate sad boy vibes, people pick them up.
thing about childhood friends is that they were just the only people available at the time...adult friends know who they are and come together in mutual interest, voluntarily choosing to spend time with one another.
would you go out of your way to hang out with the person you are?
if not, why would anyone else?
what do you offer?
hard truth is that you´re probably not going to develop any healthy friendships until you have one with you.
- 38,693
- 54,329
- Joined
- Feb 2, 2014
I think you just don’t understand nt yet
You will always get half jokes half serious answers
that’s what we do
- 170
- 114
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2020
Bruh, I can definitely take a joke. but there is a place and time for that. When I create a thread I definitely didn't come here to get troll on- like what exactly is the point of posting then?
Look, i don't know your life. But if you have a good circle- I'm happy for you. Not many of us do, and it's not always a lack of trying. And I am actively working on it and use this thread to gauge if i'm alone in this. Until you been there then I don't think you'll ever understand. I don't think I'm bitter. I certainly acknowledge my faults.
I am not dead set, but "phony" friends definitely exist. you just never encounter them.- and you should consider yourself lucky. Everyone is selfish.
Look, i don't know your life. But if you have a good circle- I'm happy for you. Not many of us do, and it's not always a lack of trying. And I am actively working on it and use this thread to gauge if i'm alone in this. Until you been there then I don't think you'll ever understand. I don't think I'm bitter. I certainly acknowledge my faults.
I am not dead set, but "phony" friends definitely exist. you just never encounter them.- and you should consider yourself lucky. Everyone is selfish.
- 30,464
- 33,758
- Joined
- Jan 8, 2006
I’ve definitely encountered fake people and cut them the hell out of my life, not saying I’ve had a perfect social life
Hell, people I was going to be groomsmen in their weddings for tried to pyramid scheme me by having one of their girls try to pitch on me and when I respectfully declined she copped an attitude and I called them out and never saw them again. They tried to reach out multiple times years later but I never hit them back.
It’s a part of life, I don’t think anyone has had a perfect draw on people they’ve considered friends. Just don’t let those bad experiences dictate your future ones.
Last edited:
- 47,242
- 96,766
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2013
Sounds like alp
- 170
- 114
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2020
totally!
it's hard to know exactly why I ended up with no real friends. I have self examine myself and I could honestly only come up with a few
- not initiating contact with said person (biggest one)
- being secretive / into myself? ( like I don't like talking about my business to someone else, especially if we aren't family"
- and then I guess just not being happy with my current life so perhaps that shows in my vibe?
- i am also very selective with who i consider a friend
im not happy with my current life due to not acheiving where i want to end up career wise/fiancially, not being surrounded by good peers who align with my vision are the probably the two main ones.
I use to be content when i was working retail. i jive with everyone but. i. felt i was stooping to them because i was much older not having established my career but from what i could tell everyone enjoyed my. company because i was friendly, helpful, never caused issues, crack jokes, etc but since i left that job to be self employed i haven't met anyone.
and the old coworkers i thought i jive with- yep only ever heard from 3 (including the gay guy) didn't hear from the rest. so im assuming they busy with their own lives, or it was all fake.
hard to pinpoint what went wrong when i don't even know
just giving ya'll a context of my situation.
- 170
- 114
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2020
why? don't you want to see my skeleton collection instead? bone runners, skel high, lows, etc
- 10,957
- 19,975
- Joined
- Dec 13, 2018
That’s only true if they are not growing as well. There is also this thing called elevating the company around you. This speaks to how you carry yourself, and those around you seeing that.
- 10,459
- 8,935
- Joined
- Mar 4, 2011
Being self employed has a socially nomadic component to it that's not really talked about. You will not be in the routine of ppl that work structured schedules. Most of the time self employed people will have to make friends with other self employed lifestyle people. Back to making friends within your peer group.
aNYone
Supporter
- 28,657
- 33,656
- Joined
- Dec 31, 2012
Rarely exists.Been trying my hand at the platonic thing recently.....
You know you tryna smash them girls
- 5,891
- 12,009
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2016
ah man...self-employment. I know that struggle, I´m a freelancer myself.
idk after reading the added context it does seem like the problem is in your mentality.
why do you put so much weight on how you´re doing financially?
you probably ate today. I assume you live indoors. you´re online. seems like you´re doing at least okayish.
hell, you seemed happier in retail...so would more friends or more money make you happier?
I say if there´s anyone in your past you still feel you may develop a friendship with, keep reaching out.
somebody liked you at some point.
yeah there are a lot of benefits to being self-employed but it´s definitely harder for us to be social.
we may not adhere to standard schedules, we may not have default socialization opportunities.
you have to make an effort to come into contact with people, and then sift through those to find quality folks.
if you have the kind of job where you work from an office, maybe try a coworking space?
Oooooh it all makes sense now
Crotchety Trumper doesn't understand why no one wants to be his friend
More at 11
- 4,038
- 4,959
- Joined
- Apr 5, 2012
As this has take a more serious turn.
Robin Williams is an example of someone who exuded life, joy, and probably had tons and tons of friends. However, he is the perfect way to really understand that it has to come from within.
Seeking something from others will always have you feeling less than whole inside.
OP id suggest using this time as an opportunity to understand yourself better. You should really solve for 95% of what you need. Friends, even family, even wives, children etc have to be closer to that 5% range. They are all uncontrollable and anything can happen. The more positivity and enjoyment you can bring to them and they to you the better or worse that 5% is going to be. But unless you are already whole inside it’s never going to solve anything by getting more (friends, gf, living in a different city etc)
Robin Williams is an example of someone who exuded life, joy, and probably had tons and tons of friends. However, he is the perfect way to really understand that it has to come from within.
Seeking something from others will always have you feeling less than whole inside.
OP id suggest using this time as an opportunity to understand yourself better. You should really solve for 95% of what you need. Friends, even family, even wives, children etc have to be closer to that 5% range. They are all uncontrollable and anything can happen. The more positivity and enjoyment you can bring to them and they to you the better or worse that 5% is going to be. But unless you are already whole inside it’s never going to solve anything by getting more (friends, gf, living in a different city etc)
- 14,576
- 16,992
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2012
waiting for trauma based experience to hit. Then we can get to the real natty natty
