For my Nike talkers in a relationship

[BaltimoreLove]

does it ever feel equal ?

I mean we talk about equality.... with the rise of the feminism cult a relationship from a mans perspective should feel like a partnership that is more or less equal and less like taking care of someone .... is this want ever met ? Or do we continue on with the notion of equality that is never truely equal ?

 

[Coromanti]

Define, "equality".

As for me:

I grew up in a divorced household. It had a strong and negative impact on how I view modern relationships. I decided early on that I wanted a more traditional style marriage. I certainly want equal respect between me and my future wife but I have to be honest and say that "equality" in the feminist, modern sense of the term is unlikely.

 

[dirty]

There is a such thing you just need to find the right biddie. Ill help you out b
https://www.farmersonly.com/?sigred=3b01b96139e09a710e8f3c8b9064743ba50adfe4#step/1

 

[jking0821]

agree with don adidada

Always grew up wanting to be the provider. I wanted to have a girl that was ok with raising a family and making that sacrifice for us so i could work and provide for the family. As great as it sounds to have two high level working professionals in a relationship who will then raise the kids? I always said if my wife made more then me i would be a stay at home dad but the most important thing to me is having a positive influence on my future child's life growing up. I don't want my kid raised by a nanny or day care system.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Everyone has a role. Whether or not you are happy in that role depends on you, but I don't think it is equal.

You will bring sonething to the table.
She will bring something to the table.

But honestly, I also agree with the idea of "happy wife, happy life."

What we want/desire/feel/do/say will always be downplayed and/or not held in as high regard. Just sonething we have to deal with and accept.

 

[illwill8710]

Sometimes you gotta play the tambourine lol.

But in all seriousness. I grew up thinking that relationships have some equality but as an older adult I've grown to realize that relationships are never equal at any given point of time. As the masculine in a relationship its always going to feel like your doing most of the work providing, protecting etc. But then again there are going to be times when the woman or feminine is doing alot as well, taking care of the house, birth etc. Equality is relative. Not to sound cheesy but don't think about it like you would everything else. Your dealing with another person that is full of emotion, love, lust wants and needs. Equality doesn't really have a place when considering those things.

 

[All Ready]

But honestly, I also agree with the idea of "happy wife, happy life."

yikes

 

[OBAMA]

these women now a days be making so much money.....hard to provide for someone that can buy everything they want.

 

[Chiron]

My Ex wanted things equal and ultimately it doesn't work for me. I like to be a provider and have more weight in the decision making. Todays society says nobody "wears the pants" and that I think its pretty dumb. Kids ultimately suffer having both parents gone all the time working... especially when one could be doing part time and instead they choose overtime. Whatever yall do find someone who you can build with. Meaning find a chick thats not trying to build her own castle while you making upgrades on yours... especially if you walk into the relationship with your life and assets on point.

In the words of contemporary philosopher Sir Kodak Black "I need me a lil baby who gon' listen"

 

[slighted]

Meaning find a chick thats not trying to build her own castle while you making upgrades on yours... especially if you walk into the relationship with your life and assets on point.

Interesting, can you elaborate on this?
Do you mean a shorty who isn't building her own career/life?

 

[atlsfinest]

Call me a new-school dude but I think this provider/primary bread-winner stuff is overrated. My girlfriend and I live with one another and I make a little bit more money, but not much. We split the bills 50/50 and when we go out, I pay more often that not but she pays sometimes too.

In 2018, I think being the sole breadwinner in that "provider" mold is an antiquated concept. You better be making alot of bread to take care of a family of 4-5 on your own. It makes it hard to save for big purchases and retirement if its all on you. Having two people working as equals financially gives you alot of flexibility.

What if you lose your job or are underemployed and you're the only one working? What if you want to further your education and go back to school? tough to do if you're the sole breadwinner.

The thing that alot of guys are afraid of is getting with a woman who makes more money than you and her rubbing it in your face or emasculating you over it. It doesn't make you any less of a man if your girl is doing well; you're a team; "equally yoked".

 

[Top Boy]

Maybe it's because I've been securing a hefty bag since my age had 'teen' suffixed to it, but I don't let myself get seriously involved with a chick that isn't grinding as well. I'll lead them on like a mf tho until things run dry.

It's 2018, a woman is just as capable of securing a bag as any man in today's world so expecting a chick to work towards building her own castle isn't exactly out of the ordinary..

I think it's more special a chick that can hold her own in this life CHOOSES to attach herself to you vs. staying with you out of necessity; being a stay-at-home mom is not a marketable skill and no rational individual would choose to live in squalor.

A chick making nearly what I make would make us a 6-figure couple and im in my early 20s, why would you not want the versatility that comes with that?

 

[JayDean03]

Nowadays. Females (feminazis) want to be breadwinners in relationships and their men to be subservient/submissive.

Relationships like that are always doomed.

I work. My wife takes care of the house and the kids. That's how it's supposed to be. (IMO)

If you 2 are working and have have kids. Good luck with that.

 

[atlsfinest]

Nowadays. Females (feminazis) want to be breadwinners in relationships and their men to be subservient/submissive.

Relationships like that are always doomed.

I work. My wife takes care of the house and the kids. That's how it's supposed to be. (IMO)

If you 2 are working and have have kids. Good luck with that.

We can agree to disagree.It's all about the type of woman you're with.

If you want to invest money, own a home, live a middle class or better lifestyle, assist in funding your children's education and save for retirement you better be bringing in big money if you're the only one working.

 

[ctidda]

So alot of people grew up in a traditional family where ya pops worked and ya moms stayed at home?
That's is rare around my way. Everybody I know had both parents working full-time or was from a single parent household.

 

[Top Boy]

Single parent household for me, so I guess that kind of influences my perspective in a way.

 

[jking0821]

We can agree to disagree.It's all about the type of woman you're with.

If you want to invest money, own a home, live a middle class or better lifestyle, assist in funding your children's education and save for retirement you better be bringing in big money if you're the only one working.

Big money is relative. I am fine with 2 kids, public school, in state tuition following community college if my wife can be home to properly raise out kids. Yes you need to make over $60k a year to pull this off but if you make $100k this is doable if you live within your means and don't have the lambo dreams. Buy your used camry let you wife drive the used CRV. Kids get old cars as their first whips. Like middle class life is more then perfect for me.

So alot of people grew up in a traditional family where ya pops worked and ya moms stayed at home?
That's is rare around my way. Everybody I know had both parents working full-time or was from a single parent household.

I was raised by a single mom. So watching her work 3 jobs and struggle to keep our lights on was tough. I want to make sure my wife never has that. I know as i kid i would have loved to have my parents around and get rides to things and not be that kid always asking for a lift or walking home. My goal is to make sure i my wife and i can raise kids the way we want them raised.

 

[tay1]

I'm cool on having a housewife. People let women get away with the "I'm raising your kids" line and allow them to be lazy.

 

[peteweezy]

Maybe it's because I've been securing a hefty bag since my age had 'teen' suffixed to it, but I don't let myself get seriously involved with a chick that isn't grinding as well. I'll lead them on like a mf tho until things run dry.

It's 2018, a woman is just as capable of securing a bag as any man in today's world so expecting a chick to work towards building her own castle isn't exactly out of the ordinary..

I think it's more special a chick that can hold her own in this life CHOOSES to attach herself to you vs. staying with you out of necessity; being a stay-at-home mom is not a marketable skill and no rational individual would choose to live in squalor.

A chick making nearly what I make would make us a 6-figure couple and im in my early 20s, why would you not want the versatility that comes with that?

Leading chicks on? Sounds like someone isn't getting girls like they think. I don't have time to waste "leading" girls or anybody on. F all that fam either a chick for me or not. Once she's not it's done. I do agree with you though she need to be about her business though. I agree with atlsfinest I'm not with the breadwinner stuff. I don't care about the throwing it in my face because as long as you're not a loser she can't throw anything in your face. She makes more okay but if she leaves will you be able to make it without and find someone else? If the answer is yes then there is nothing else to talk about imo.

 

[peteweezy]

Big money is relative. I am fine with 2 kids, public school, in state tuition following community college if my wife can be home to properly raise out kids. Yes you need to make over $60k a year to pull this off but if you make $100k this is doable if you live within your means and don't have the lambo dreams. Buy your used camry let you wife drive the used CRV. Kids get old cars as their first whips. Like middle class life is more then perfect for me.



I was raised by a single mom. So watching her work 3 jobs and struggle to keep our lights on was tough. I want to make sure my wife never has that. I know as i kid i would have loved to have my parents around and get rides to things and not be that kid always asking for a lift or walking home. My goal is to make sure i my wife and i can raise kids the way we want them raised.

I ain't going to lie it sounds like plain Jane life is your aim. If that works for you fine but couldn't be me.

 

[Top Boy]

Leading chicks on? Sounds like someone isn't getting girls like they think

Did I ever say I was swimming in punani? Negro im grinding, I spend 0 effort chasing skirts and let situations naturally play themselves out.

Pump ya breaks reverse Hef

 

[OneNightDan]

Can’t really say, my mom was the “breadwinner” for the better part of my childhood. Now, my dad put his CDL to work & is making more than my mom. When we were kids, my dad spent most of the time cleaning, cooking, watching after us, & the usual stuff around the house. Plumbing, oil changes, handy work, etc...
My mom worked nights, & my dad during the day. So someone was always home, when either we left for school or getting home from school. In the end, they both sacrificed something. I can’t say there’s a right or wrong way to do things? You make it work for the relationship, but most importantly the kids. Keep in mind my parents are from Mexico, & have some old school thoughts & beliefs. So, I’m sure it wasn’t easy for my dad to put his pride aside at first, but it all worked out.

 

[Chiron]

With my castle building comment, I'm not saying a chick has to stay at home and can't contribute.

Here's the thing though... If you are making money, got a nice crib, nice car, stable career (career not job) and you got pretty good handle on your goals. A chick with her own agenda can really mess you up. You should be looking for companionship that complements your life. You want the physical intimacy. After that fun experiences together. After that some deeper emotional understanding. Then finally some kind of map for what you want to accomplish TOGETHER.

If you mapped out your life goals before you met the other person... then they need to be made aware. and they need to support your goals so you can support theirs. In a relationship, you arent doing a dash or a marathon anymore... You are doing a relay race or one of those three legged races... and if you got kids you just made it a triathlon on top of that. When one tries to do their thing without the other with them, you cant bass the baton and you cant win. Women are pretty selfish though (in general). They think being pulled one way means you are making choices for them. Now they dont feel equal. You dont want them to have their own. Your sexist. etc. And "Happy Wife, Happy Life" is just another way of saying women are selfish and if they don't get their way they will try and get it at your expense or from someone else.

Both people gotta decide what pieces from their own goals they don't want to adjust then erase the path they were going to use solo and re-draw the map together so both people hit their checkpoints in life. King and Queen gotta be on one accord for the castle to stay standing.

 

[nawghtyhare]

these women now a days be making so much money.....hard to provide for someone that can buy everything they want.

My wife ain’t buyin ****
Unless she consult me first
I mean bigger items
She ain’t gotta ask to like buy a slice of pizza
Or gas
And stuff like that
I do the same as well

 

[Chiron]

And I don't know what Big Money or living wealthy is to other people but if you talking outside of middle class... 6 figures, millionaires even. It takes total dedication of your time to get there if you don't come from money. Social Mobility in America only happens for those who are totally dedicated. Your woman either will understand that and help. Understand and put up with whatever comes with that. Or will not understand. But time together is the fuel in a relationship. The woman has total control of that fuel efficiency.