Bruh, I dont think im ever getting married

[DCAllAfrican]

Marriage contracts would be cool. But emotionally people need to shift their expectations of what marriage is supposed to brinf

when you find the right one>>>>>>

this generation too damn soft. shout out to the real fathers and husbands out there making it work even when it gets hard to make it work.

Don't fall in love with the idea of marriage, fall in love with your best friend. 

LOL @ Using the, "This generation is soft" defense mechanism in THIS discussion

 

[Sir San Diego]

Do you feel like it's hard to manage your career and handle the kids that much? It's a concern for me since I'm an engineer

No. I'm used to it now. I had to change professions to have more time, but that led to me choosing to be my own boss and I'm working on that now, while I do sales to pay the bills. It was definitely an adjustment, but I wouldn't change it now.

nah,  if you real then you don't need to misinterprate anything. Divorce doesn't make one weak or deficient, but there are a lot of dudes who get married with no business being married who tap out at the first sign of trouble. Obviously some situations get out of hand and there is nothing left to but get sepperated.

Especially on the females end, dudes need to wisen up and see the real reason why a chick wants to get married...will she ride it out when you have to switch jobs, wtc those kind of things. Its sad when two people get into the same marriage for totally seperate reasons.

Oh. Gotcha.

 

[Sumrndmdude!]

Marriage contracts would be cool. But emotionally people need to shift their expectations of what marriage is supposed to brinf

when you find the right one>>>>>>

this generation too damn soft. shout out to the real fathers and husbands out there making it work even when it gets hard to make it work.

Don't fall in love with the idea of marriage, fall in love with your best friend. 

LOL @ Using the, "This generation is soft" defense mechanism in THIS discussion

but it is though, and I'm part of it. 

you know how many girls i know who get divorced because "he doesn't let me go to the club no more"? Priorities all messed up, and social media doesnt help.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

 
nah,  if you real then you don't need to misinterprate anything. Divorce doesn't make one weak or deficient, but there are a lot of dudes who get married with no business being married who tap out at the first sign of trouble. Obviously some situations get out of hand and there is nothing left to but get sepperated.

So why not give props to those that are MATURE enough to know they don't want marriage and don't get into a marriage

 

[DCAllAfrican]

 
but it is though, and I'm part of it. 

you know how many girls i know who get divorced because "he doesn't let me go to the club no more"? Priorities all messed up, and social media doesnt help.

Let's back up for a second.

What is the "soft" part exactly?

 

[Sumrndmdude!]

 

 
but it is though, and I'm part of it. 

you know how many girls i know who get divorced because "he doesn't let me go to the club no more"? Priorities all messed up, and social media doesnt help.

Let's back up for a second.

What is the "soft" part exactly?

people have been referncing dvorce. generation is soft because they try to find all manner of excuses to divorce.

 

[Sir San Diego]

That said, isn't it better to just not get married if the whole generation is "soft" and looking for excuses then? Why set yourself up for failure?

I'm 37. Am I a part of the soft generation?

 

[heliumclinton]

tbh there's very little incentive for us men to get married in this current age
It's all a status thing

Ain't no point in even having titles period, boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other

Scratch all those statuses

It just is what it is

 

[Xennial]

That said, isn't it better to just not get married if the whole generation is "soft" and looking for excuses then? Why set yourself up for failure?

I'm 37. Am I a part of the soft generation?

Think he means millenials which means born in 1982 and later so no you're not part of the "soft" generation

 

[htg designs]

For better or worse, ******

 

[Sumrndmdude!]

millenials obssesed with being millenials, 

 **** makes no sense.

 

[Sumrndmdude!]

That said, isn't it better to just not get married if the whole generation is "soft" and looking for excuses then? Why set yourself up for failure?

I'm 37. Am I a part of the soft generation?

if you ain't soft you aint soft. Then you don't fit the mold...

but the common view of marriage by this generation is as was described in my earlier statement.

Marriage serves some purpose.

growing old and dieing alone isn't a good look either...

 

[DCAllAfrican]

 
growing old and dieing alone isn't a good look either...

https://dontmarry.wordpress.com/

 

[mangudai954]

but it is though, and I'm part of it. 

you know how many girls i know who get divorced because "he doesn't let me go to the club no more"? Priorities all messed up, and social media doesnt help.

How do you explain the 80s, and the 90s when the divorce rate was higher than it is now? They aren't part of the "soft" generation. If this generation is so soft shouldn't the current divorce rate be higher than it was previously?

 

[Mamba4life]

People often want what they don't have. Some folks will tap out at the first signs of trouble because they think the grass is greener elsewhere. They go elsewhere and realize that it's all grass. Let me tell you guys something. The older it gets, the harder it gets. It's like the clock in females heads start getting louder and louder as the years go by. The chick that used to be cool with you coming through and smashing whenever when you are in your early 20s starts acting differently when she gets in her late 20s. By the time you get to your 30s, if you choose to date women in their 30s, watch and see how things change. You go out on two dates and the girl wants to know what it means. You hit and all of a sudden you're in a relationship. As you creep up in age, you will realize you're dealing with more and more remnants of failed relationships....be it children, attitudes, lack of trust....etc. The talent pool starts to shrink too.





















Now...you could get around ALL of that by just continuing to date younger women

 

[mangudai954]

So its an accumulation of baggage from previous relationships, social expectation(to be married by a certain age), and concern about their biological clock? Makes sense.

 

[bravelude]

cut out the essay replies

 

[Mamba4life]

So its an accumulation of baggage from previous relationships, social expectation(to be married by a certain age), and concern about their biological clock? Makes sense.

The game changes....all I'm saying. You're going to change too. Happens to all of us.

 

[smedroc]

I think the addition of the internet into our culture has made more people more ambitious in all areas of their lives. Relationships, careers.... Just being aware of the amount of options that are out there will make people less likely to settle for a situation that is subpar.

For example.... Before the thick girls thread and girls in yoga pants on instagram i didn't know it was possible for women to be built like that because i hadn't encountered it. So now if my flat back 6 is giving me drama, i'm way more likely to roll the dice and bounce knowing there's ungodly cheeks out there.

 

[Mamba4life]

I honestly don't think there's any rhyme or reason to it. I have friends who have gone through the blender. One guy in particular has literally gone through 100s of thousands of dollars getting divorced. Got divorced. I blinked my eyes and the dude was married again. No rhyme or reason.

 

[suburbanguy]

Also when it comes to choosing women I feel like dudes dont vet enough and they dont pay attention enough to the small things.  When she makes unnecessary snide comments, when she actively engages in double standards, the way she treats certain people either close to you or the way she treats people who provide her a service like waiters or post office workers etc.

A ton of truth to this statement. Vetting a woman that you think could be the one is something that I did with my current relationship. Sounds weird because it's not the most sexy thing to do or even feels like the genuine thing to do. But if you're planning to "spend the rest of your life" with your mate, gotta find out who they are from a personality standpoint. How she treats others goes a long way on how she will treat you when times are good and bad.

 

[keel252]

People often want what they don't have. Some folks will tap out at the first signs of trouble because they think the grass is greener elsewhere. They go elsewhere and realize that it's all grass. Let me tell you guys something. The older it gets, the harder it gets. It's like the clock in females heads start getting louder and louder as the years go by. The chick that used to be cool with you coming through and smashing whenever when you are in your early 20s starts acting differently when she gets in her late 20s. By the time you get to your 30s, if you choose to date women in their 30s, watch and see how things change. You go out on two dates and the girl wants to know what it means. You hit and all of a sudden you're in a relationship. As you creep up in age, you will realize you're dealing with more and more remnants of failed relationships....be it children, attitudes, lack of trust....etc. The talent pool starts to shrink too.





















Now...you could get around ALL of that by just continuing to date younger women

Soooooooo much truth with this. The older you get the uglier it gets out here in the field.

 

[wayniac211]

if you ain't soft you aint soft. Then you don't fit the mold...

but the common view of marriage by this generation is as was described in my earlier statement.


Marriage serves some purpose.

growing old and dieing alone isn't a good look either...

. These triple og's are bitter when alone and easily annoyed. Yet there are some that KNOW their significant other is plotting with the trust fund.

 

[andretti]

Do you feel like it's hard to manage your career and handle the kids that much? It's a concern for me since I'm an engineer

No. I'm used to it now. I had to change professions to have more time, but that led to me choosing to be my own boss and I'm working on that now, while I do sales to pay the bills. It was definitely an adjustment, but I wouldn't change it now.

nah,  if you real then you don't need to misinterprate anything. Divorce doesn't make one weak or deficient, but there are a lot of dudes who get married with no business being married who tap out at the first sign of trouble. Obviously some situations get out of hand and there is nothing left to but get sepperated.

Especially on the females end, dudes need to wisen up and see the real reason why a chick wants to get married...will she ride it out when you have to switch jobs, wtc those kind of things. Its sad when two people get into the same marriage for totally seperate reasons.

Oh. Gotcha.

You love what you do for work?

 

[Sumrndmdude!]

 

but it is though, and I'm part of it. 

you know how many girls i know who get divorced because "he doesn't let me go to the club no more"? Priorities all messed up, and social media doesnt help.

How do you explain the 80s, and the 90s when the divorce rate was higher than it is now? They aren't part of the "soft" generation. If this generation is so soft shouldn't the current divorce rate be higher than it was previously?

90's soft too.

80's cocaine.

60's and 70's bout it bout it tho