I am the Black Sheep in my Family

[mellowhigh]

Forcereal
How old are you op?

19

 

[cereal killa]

How old are you? Considering the fact that you said you moved out at 18, I'd say you're old enough now that you should have manned up and started living your life for you and not your family. Don't be one of those people who gets so hung up on not fitting in with your family that you miss out on life and end up not accomplishing anything. Yea it does hurt, but instead of worrying about it, find a craft and perfect it to the point that you're the best at it. Eventually, everything else will come back around full circle.

 

[sensorice]

How old are you? Considering the fact that you said you moved out at 18, I'd say you're old enough now that you should have manned up and started living your life for you and not your family. Don't be one of those people who gets so hung up on not fitting in with your family that you miss out on life and end up not accomplishing anything. Yea it does hurt, but instead of worrying about it, find a craft and perfect it to the point that you're the best at it. Eventually, everything else will come back around full circle.

This...Usually parents just want the best for you. But in any case, don't let anything keep you from making progress.

 

[mellowhigh]

To compare myself to my two older brothers, I'm the one who hasn't "accomplished" anything. But in reality, they haven't. I'm striving to become a Graphic Designer and make that $$$. But my parents don't see anything in that type of career. My brothers got dead-end jobs and my parents love them and don't give a damn what I do.

 

[sensorice]

Use that as motivation and prove them wrong.

 

[sofa king awsm]

live for yourself bro.

 

[mojodmonky1]

if youre 19 there is a VERY good chance that you are just misreading the entire scenario. Unless your parents are straight up deadbeats, they just want what THEY THINK is best for you, even if you might not agree with it. That is where the disconnect is coming. That doesnt mean they think any less of you or care about you less than your brothers.

I felt the same way growing up. I was the middle of 3 brothers, and also had a baby sister. Both my brothers excelled in academics (both top 5 in their class, went to good colleges) while I was busy smokin buds and gettin into shenanigans with my friends. Obviously, I got the brunt of my parents wrath due to said shenanigans, and I always felt that my parents just didnt understand me and that they didnt care bout me as much as my siblings. As I grew up, I found out that it wasnt the case. My parents just had difficulty relating with me since my outlook on life wasnt really in line with theirs. FFWD some years, and now me and pops can talk about stuff straight up man to man, and we have a great relationship. I'd say we have a better relationship than any of my other siblings, and a lot of that has to do with the growing pains I experienced as a youngster. I now see where he was coming from, and he also realizes where I was coming from. What started as a battle of differences in beliefs has now become a mutual respect for those same differences.

 

[supraman1784]

Use that as motivation and prove them wrong.

this.

nothing i do seems to please my parents or any of my relatives. i bounced around multiple jobs because i didnt like them very much and i couldnt find one that i liked enough or motivated me enough to do my best. i kept hearing it all the time about me not going to succeed etc....

im trying to start my own business and im still hearing all this bs that i won't succeed or that this isn't the right path.

i definitely use this as motivation and i stopped caring about what other people are thinking. im following my path and doing things on my terms. the result? im not making a ton of money at the moment, but im much happier and the potential for what im doing is limitless and that motivates me like no other. sometimes you just gotta filter all the negative stuff out and focus on the positive.

im asian....if that matters. everyone in my family gives me sh*t for not following the traditional path out of school of finding a good secure job and getting married. i went the entrepreneurial route instead and have an awesome single life . right now idgaf what they think.

 

[Kimchi Papi]

if youre 19 there is a VERY good chance that you are just misreading the entire scenario. Unless your parents are straight up deadbeats, they just want what THEY THINK is best for you, even if you might not agree with it. That is where the disconnect is coming. That doesnt mean they think any less of you or care about you less than your brothers.
I felt the same way growing up. I was the middle of 3 brothers, and also had a baby sister. Both my brothers excelled in academics (both top 5 in their class, went to good colleges) while I was busy smokin buds and gettin into shenanigans with my friends. Obviously, I got the brunt of my parents wrath due to said shenanigans, and I always felt that my parents just didnt understand me and that they didnt care bout me as much as my siblings. As I grew up, I found out that it wasnt the case. My parents just had difficulty relating with me since my outlook on life wasnt really in line with theirs. FFWD some years, and now me and pops can talk about stuff straight up man to man, and we have a great relationship. I'd say we have a better relationship than any of my other siblings, and a lot of that has to do with the growing pains I experienced as a youngster. I now see where he was coming from, and he also realizes where I was coming from. What started as a battle of differences in beliefs has now become a mutual respect for those same differences.

One of the best posts I've ever read on NT. Cheers dude...It's amazing as you get older how you understand things so differently. Old sayings start to make so much sense like "the ignorance of youth".

 

[souljaman22]

Whats this mean? Like Seriously I'm lost help
Seriously :\

feels bad man, people just saw it that way.
op im goin through the same thing, all of my dads kids graduated college and i graduated highschool in 2011 and dont know what to do
feels batman

 

[mycoldyourdone]

goodbye to you my trusted friend.. .. we've known eachother since we were nine or ten.. .. .

together we've climbed hills and trees, learned of love and ABC's, skinned our hearts and skinned our knees

 

[mycoldyourdone]

live for yourself bro.

this. you dont need to prove anything to them. that wouldnt be living for yourself.

get away from negativity. just cause theyre youre family doesnt mean theyre the smartest people ever. do not waste time on people who's opinion shouldnt matter to you. even if theyre blood.

get the eff away from negativity. if youre too young to move out, then just take the negativity out of your mind. its such a waste of time.

 

[mojodmonky1]

live for yourself bro.

this. you dont need to prove anything to them. that wouldnt be living for yourself.

get away from negativity. just cause theyre youre family doesnt mean theyre the smartest people ever. do not waste time on people who's opinion shouldnt matter to you. even if theyre blood.

get the eff away from negativity. if youre too young to move out, then just take the negativity out of your mind. its such a waste of time.

are you saying that the only opinion that should matter is your own? thats a pretty narrowminded view of life. if your parents/family's opinion "shouldnt matter" who's should? i hate to play the "old man of NT" card, but some of you young dudes just need to be patient. you gotta let go of the whole "me against the world" mindset. while it may not be the case for everyone, for the vast majority, YOUR PARENTS ARE LOOKING OUT FOR YOUR BEST INTEREST. I'm not a parent myself yet, but I'm pretty sure they dont handout "how to be a perfect parent" handbooks at the hospital when your baby is born. Some parents are just better than others at relating with their kids and getting the message across. But just because your parents suck balls at communicating with you, dont assume that the message they are trying to communicate is entirely BS.

 

[mycoldyourdone]

no not at all. i didnt really read the rest of the thread. he said blacksheep so i assumed that he was getting blamed or ragged on for petty stuff like a middle child or harry potter.

but if you have a parent that is like precious' mom or a parent with messed up values like theyd abandon you if you were gay, then you would know that its unhealthy to have that around you. all in all theres different levels to it, and my main point was to stay away from negativity. then again i dont know rhe whole story.

 

[thenewjs23]

I'm in the same boat but It doesnt bother me. My sis and brothers are dependent on our parents though. If they were to pass, they would have nothing. All above the age of 22.

 

[semf]

No matter what I do, it seems like I can never please my parents. Don't know if anybody on NT feels the same, but really bummed out about this this. I'm like the outcast.

mellowhigh, how do your folks make you feel like an outcast? what have they said and done?

I think this thread veered off on a tangent and I didn't figure what's going on with you . . .

 

[nooera]

if youre 19 there is a VERY good chance that you are just misreading the entire scenario. Unless your parents are straight up deadbeats, they just want what THEY THINK is best for you, even if you might not agree with it. That is where the disconnect is coming. That doesnt mean they think any less of you or care about you less than your brothers.
I felt the same way growing up. I was the middle of 3 brothers, and also had a baby sister. Both my brothers excelled in academics (both top 5 in their class, went to good colleges) while I was busy smokin buds and gettin into shenanigans with my friends. Obviously, I got the brunt of my parents wrath due to said shenanigans, and I always felt that my parents just didnt understand me and that they didnt care bout me as much as my siblings. As I grew up, I found out that it wasnt the case. My parents just had difficulty relating with me since my outlook on life wasnt really in line with theirs. FFWD some years, and now me and pops can talk about stuff straight up man to man, and we have a great relationship. I'd say we have a better relationship than any of my other siblings, and a lot of that has to do with the growing pains I experienced as a youngster. I now see where he was coming from, and he also realizes where I was coming from. What started as a battle of differences in beliefs has now become a mutual respect for those same differences.

Great post fams : hat

 

[mellowhigh]

if youre 19 there is a VERY good chance that you are just misreading the entire scenario. Unless your parents are straight up deadbeats, they just want what THEY THINK is best for you, even if you might not agree with it. That is where the disconnect is coming. That doesnt mean they think any less of you or care about you less than your brothers.
I felt the same way growing up. I was the middle of 3 brothers, and also had a baby sister. Both my brothers excelled in academics (both top 5 in their class, went to good colleges) while I was busy smokin buds and gettin into shenanigans with my friends. Obviously, I got the brunt of my parents wrath due to said shenanigans, and I always felt that my parents just didnt understand me and that they didnt care bout me as much as my siblings. As I grew up, I found out that it wasnt the case. My parents just had difficulty relating with me since my outlook on life wasnt really in line with theirs. FFWD some years, and now me and pops can talk about stuff straight up man to man, and we have a great relationship. I'd say we have a better relationship than any of my other siblings, and a lot of that has to do with the growing pains I experienced as a youngster. I now see where he was coming from, and he also realizes where I was coming from. What started as a battle of differences in beliefs has now become a mutual respect for those same differences.

Thanks fambs, I understand what you're trying to tell me.This really helped me a lot

.

 

[jackel56]

I know that feel op

 

[mellowhigh]

mellowhigh, how do your folks make you feel like an outcast? what have they said and done?
I think this thread veered off on a tangent and I didn't figure what's going on with you . . .

They don't acknowledge what I've accomplished, even after graduating HS. They didn't care. Didn't even attend the ceremony.

 

[beh235]

if youre 19 there is a VERY good chance that you are just misreading the entire scenario. Unless your parents are straight up deadbeats, they just want what THEY THINK is best for you, even if you might not agree with it. That is where the disconnect is coming. That doesnt mean they think any less of you or care about you less than your brothers.

I felt the same way growing up. I was the middle of 3 brothers, and also had a baby sister. Both my brothers excelled in academics (both top 5 in their class, went to good colleges) while I was busy smokin buds and gettin into shenanigans with my friends. Obviously, I got the brunt of my parents wrath due to said shenanigans, and I always felt that my parents just didnt understand me and that they didnt care bout me as much as my siblings. As I grew up, I found out that it wasnt the case. My parents just had difficulty relating with me since my outlook on life wasnt really in line with theirs. FFWD some years, and now me and pops can talk about stuff straight up man to man, and we have a great relationship. I'd say we have a better relationship than any of my other siblings, and a lot of that has to do with the growing pains I experienced as a youngster. I now see where he was coming from, and he also realizes where I was coming from. What started as a battle of differences in beliefs has now become a mutual respect for those same differences.

Mojo in the clutch!!! On that ole Malcolm In The Middle Steez . J/K