Jobert Sucaldito hospitalized after accident with cucumber vol 1000th post FTW

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Showbiz talk show host Jobert Sucaldito is recovering at the Capitol Medical Center in Quezon City after a successful emergency surgery to remove a largepiece of cucumber that got stuck in his rectum, according to reports.

Sucaldito, one of the hosts of ABS-CBN's "The Buzz,"reportedly met with the accident Sunday night and was rushed to the hospital after complaining of "extreme pain" in his bottom.

X-rays subsequently revealed that a broken piece of cucumber, about five inches in length, had gotten lodged into the lower end of his large intestine.

It was not immediately clear how the cucumber got there.

The surgeons who operated on Sucaldito were tight-lipped and refused to discuss his case with media, citing doctor-patient confidentiality. Oddly enough,they all looked like they were trying vainly to keep from laughing and refused to look reporters in the eye.

Members of Sucaldito's household who declined to be named said they recovered the other half of the cucumber, also five inches in length, inSucaldito's bedroom.

They said it had "bite marks" and was in a "soggy" state.

Besides the cucumber, they said they also found "a bottle of Johnson's baby oil, pictures of scantily clad men, and lots of tissuepaper."

Reached by phone, Sucaldito said he is fine and will be discharged from hospital soon. He explained that it was all an accident.


Cucumbers Have Rights, Too

"Gumagawa kasi ako ng salad. Napaupo ako dun sa chair e meron palang pipino dun na patayo ang pusisyon. Basta, mabilis kasi ang mga pangyayari(I was making a salad. I sat on a chair but there was a cucumber there in an upright position. Everything just happened so fast)" he said.

In a related development, a group of vegan Filipinos is reportedly thinking of filing an abuse complaintagainst Sucaldito for allegedly molesting a harmless and defenseless vegetable.

http://goodtimesmanila.co...-accident-with-cucumber/
 
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Such a very lame excuse! How can a cucumber get stuck in his a** just by sitting on it?!?
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Nice one for your 1000th pre!
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^^Nalungkot si Jobert kaya nag-solo flight!
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Salad huh?! He ate the cucumber whole and went straight to his a**!
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damn i though it was ang april fools joke kind of thing, haha hanep sa palusot, naupuan habang gumagawa ng salad sa kwarto na may baby oil at tumayo pa yungpipino
 
"Gumagawa kasi ako ng salad. Napaupo ako dun sa chair e meron palang pipino dun na patayo ang pusisyon. Basta, mabilis kasi ang mga pangyayari (I was making a salad. I sat on a chair but there was a cucumber there in an upright position. Everything just happened so fast)" he said.



Epic Fail
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so he was tryin to put a 10inch cucumber up his ***
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or maybe he did
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and when he was about to pull it out, it was cut into half & got stuck
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Great 1000th post
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on the news.. thought it was a joke and then..

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EEEEEWWWWW!!! What the??!!

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great 1000th post..
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Originally Posted by realtalkjohnny


Besides the cucumber, they said they also found "a bottle of Johnson's baby oil, pictures of scantily clad men, and lots of tissue paper."
What more can you ask for?
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But still
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