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Job discrimination is prevalent it's all about meeting a status que I used to work hr w a huge company and they hire "certain" ppl just to got the criteria, it's a double edged sword
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September is a dope *** name....Thank god for a normal name. All these Jadeveons, D'Brickashaws, and Quintashias will be getting rude awakenings going into the workforce, unless they make it in sports or IG. Parents, help your kids out at birth please. My dad saved me from being Marquis Jamal Cassius and saved my sister from being September.
We have to stop kowtowing to white supremacyCan you forward this video to all the young, single mothers in the hood and all Dequwannas, La-shas, Trimeckas, and Toshibas*?
*These are all real people's names.
I don't believe in ish like this but both my older siblings got ghetto sounding names and I got a white name but I'm the only one who went to college
Still gon name my son LeBronye though
Arabic name but Nigerian. I've had success with jobs though, strange.
They still got asian last names thoughAsians been ahead of the game on this ditching their cultures to give their kids white *** names.
We have to stop kowtowing to white supremacyCan you forward this video to all the young, single mothers in the hood and all Dequwannas, La-shas, Trimeckas, and Toshibas*?
*These are all real people's names.
Love the spirit, but there are ways to be subtly awesome...I named my rugrat Deion, which translates from Greek as "of Zeus" and makes reference to Dionysius, god of revelry, winemaking and ritual madness (aka his origin story...oops).
Pshh still naming my possible son Zeus. May anyone who discriminates be smitten by the thunder of olympus.
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"Expecting (the Worst)", available now on (undermyfitted...)
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A lot more than most people think, actually. Behind almost every birth certificate, there was a long, drawn out discussion of what would appear on it. Even your own name was likely the result of an extended debate and possibly a few arguments.
I myself was going to be named a few things, some worse than others, but in the end my father’s narcissism won out and I was named “Anthony”, after him. It’s not the worst name in the world…just a bit unimaginative.
However, when I consider what might have been, I appreciate what I ended up being called more than ever. A lot of people I know personally got saddled with some real whoppers. I can’t specify, obviously…if the people tagged with them see their meaningless, made-up names rigged together out of apostrophes, vowels, and duct tape, they’ll know I was talking about them…and in news of importance, try to sue me or something).
I’m sure you can think of a few cases that you’re aware of where you wonder whether the parents were on hard drugs or off the wagon when they named their kid.
By its very nature, a name is something a child must carry with it for its entire life, or at least until they’re old enough to get that ******** changed. A good name is a bonus attribute for a person, sounding pretty, being pleasing to the ear, or just being pronounced correctly every first day of school.
It’s also one less thing for other kids to make fun of…why not head off a complex before it ever happens? In short, a good name is a good start for your kid’s run at life.
In contrast, a bad name is like stumbling out of the blocks…it’s not impossible to win, just that much harder than it had to be. Truly bad names come in four main flavors, “Why that Word” (Apple, Sixteen, Passion), “Frankenstein's Moniker” (LeDavid, D’Napoleon, Obamanesha), “Bad Scrabble Rack” (Shaquante, Uniqua, Mxypltlik), and the insidious “Accidental Joke” (Richard Head, Love Jones, Donald Duck…seriously, Google that last guy, he turned to a life of crime. Wonder why?).
Your mileage may vary, but I assume most reasonable people would want to avoid doing something like that to their own child.
To that end, this chapter is a guideline to giving your soon-to-be-baby the best name you two can agree on, broken down step by step in the hopes that you can get this surprisingly tricky process out of the way smoothly. Let’s start in the obvious place…
First Name
Think of a first name as a brand name, like Coca-Cola. (Not as a name for your kid, dickhole.) The first name, obviously, is a person’s introduction, the first thing most people ever know about them. A rose by any other name would smell as sweet, but I’m betting the florist would sell slightly less of them if they started randomly calling them “herpes blooms” tomorrow, so that theory only goes so far.
You might have a few in mind that you’ve always liked, and that’s a good start. Now you’ll want to eliminate a few possibilities to make the discussion shorter. First, try making flash cards of some of the name candidates and showing them to a few people. If nobody catches the pronunciation the first few times, you might want to reconsider.
Also, just in case you were toying with the idea, most product names are a bad idea. Naming your daughter Alize makes it that much easier to pick a stripper name one day. (It’s a more common thing for girls than boys, and should become a less common thing overall.)
You both will also want to not do anything stupid like naming your kid after any exes. Sure, the odds are low the other person will ever find out and it’s nice that you still carry a flame for your lost love, but let’s say it does one day come out. I’ll spare you the scandalous and sensationalistic speculation, but you can’t tell me that will turn out well with a straight face.
Also, as a note to any females who are reading this, please do not name your baby after “his father” if you are unsure of your child’s paternity. That should be self-explanatory to anyone who isn’t a deceitful gutterbutt tramp mistress.
Another thing you may want to consider not doing is mangling actual English words into names. I’ve seen “’Telligent”, who may grow up to be dumber than a bag of left-handed hammers and absolutely has an apostrophe as the first letter of his name, “Harleequinn”, who probably chalks the fact that everyone laughs at her name to the fact that it refers to Joker’s sidekick, and “Darealyst”, who has a very fake-sounding name. (I hope he never gets pulled over without an ID, it’ll be one of the realest situations he’ll ever encounter.)
Being unique is one thing, being an object of ridicule for everyone with a 3[sup]rd[/sup] grade education before they even see your face is another.
The first name is also the big prize for name-afters. Expect to hear some requests from both camps for the baby to be named after this aunt or that great-grandfather, or maybe even yourself. (I personally think that defeats the purpose of having different names so people can respond to different sounds and know they, specifically, are being referred to. As I mentioned though, I’m a junior…second…whatever…so I can’t really say ****.)
Know that this is that serious to anyone who takes the time to ask, and having one family member feel slighted because you gave the baby another’s name is a barrel of ******** you don’t need in your life. When you think about how her family is probably pressuring her the same way, it’s really a lot of pressure in an already highly pressurized situation.
If there’s going to be a dispute at all about which relative gets the first name, I strongly suggest you go in a completely different direction with it. Turn over a completely new leaf and name it after nobody on either tree. That way everybody can only be just as mad as the next person who didn’t get a child dedicated to them, and they can all form a support group and get the **** over it together.
Remember, it’s your baby…otherwise they’d be reading this book instead.
Middle Name(s)
Here, inconspicuously tucked between the names people use on a regular basis, is where people tend to color outside the lines a bit. If you’re going to throw a curveball, you’ll want to put it here where the only time it will regularly be heard are when mommy is extremely upset at the kid. (Nothing like hearing your full birth name from a distance to let you know playtime is over.)
I’ve heard everything from “Algonquin” to “Crimefighter” to “Skyy” (seriously with the liquor, people!) to “Zachariah” stuck in the middle, and only on high school graduation day will anyone who counts ever have to know.
This is where people often stash things like the name of the small town the child was born (or conceived) in, names of historical figures, personal quirkiness such as a character name from a movie that only the person who gave it to them ever saw twice on purpose, and family names they could not get out of under penalty of banishment.
Some people even choose to give their children multiple middle names to honor half a family line or something, which is a nice thought. (Well, except for the poor kid who will be stuck trying to memorize their name until they’re 8.)
The Last Name
This usually is pretty straightforward. The kid gets its father’s last name (I suspect this is done with the hope that one day the mother will have it too and they can be a complete set). If mommy will be attempting to play the roles of both parents because she tried to give a child to a man who did not want one, this pattern still holds.
A not-unheard-of alternative is the hyphenation of both last names, the order of which obviously shall be based on what sounds better, if it makes a difference (e.g. Irons-Smith).
If it doesn’t, it should be settled between you with the knowledge that the last-last name is the first last name people think of and what it will be shortened to in common usage…so at least there’s something to fight over.
Also, If one of your last names is Gingenbottoms or something equally unfortunate, then you might want to tuck that out of sight before the dash so at least your child can have something you never did…a chance to hide it. Doesn’t any responsible parent want better for their kids?
Initials Here
Something many people don’t immediately consider is the initials that the name they chose form. They really should. For example, “Franklin Arnold Turner” might sound like a pretty inoffensive name, but a closer inspection reveals that the kid better not be too far overweight if he wants to make it through middle school alive.
Most sets of initials are complete nonsense (even cool-sounding nonsense like my accidental kid accidentally ended up with…”DXVM” sounds like a distant, futuristic Super Bowl or an experimental fighter jet, which is fairly awesome) and considering the alternative, it’s probably best that way. I have a funny feeling it doesn’t feel great to come to school the day after some kid figures out that your initials are “LOL”, “STD”, or worse.
Picking a name together can be one of the few fun parts of this whole thing, if you two aren’t too far apart in your idea of what makes a good name. Of course, if one of you wants to pick a name from the front of Pop Culture Magazine (how many Rihannas were there twenty years ago? How about since 2005?) and the other wants to honor a grandmother, there are going to be problems…but hell, at least you now have the tools to work through them as quickly as possible.
side note...Thank god for a normal name. All these Jadeveons, D'Brickashaws, and Quintashias will be getting rude awakenings going into the workforce, unless they make it in sports or IG. Parents, help your kids out at birth please. My dad saved me from being Marquis Jamal Cassius and saved my sister from being September.
We have to stop kowtowing to white supremacyCan you forward this video to all the young, single mothers in the hood and all Dequwannas, La-shas, Trimeckas, and Toshibas*?
*These are all real people's names.
You dont have to have a "white name"(whatever that means) to have a name that means something.
No surprise here. I really feel for some of the names I've seen recent newborns receiving... Talk about an uphill climb
Say this every time I see a hood influenced name or something so far left. Your name is the first thing that is on an application, job or college. If it rubs the person the wrong way it is going in the trash regardless if you are qualified. My kid will have a plain name just to excuse them from any discrimination their skin color won't already bring them.
Man what cracks me up, when white people say tyrone is a black name but i know more white tyrone's than black tyrone's lmaoo
That is only because Asia was conquered "ahead of the game"Asians been ahead of the game on this ditching their cultures to give their kids white *** names.
Never met a White Tyronne in my life.
The sheer thought of a white man having the name Tyronne makes me chuckle lol.
Never met a White Tyronne in my life.
The sheer thought of a white man having the name Tyronne makes me chuckle lol.