"Non-South Florida, Florida" Takes Another L, Vol. We Shootin Missles In Cars Now

[bennyice47]

[h1]Florida Woman Arrested For Shooting Missile Into Car Has The Most Florida Name Imaginable[/h1]
We may have officially reached peak Florida, now that a woman named CRYSTAL METHENEY has been arrested for shooting a missile into an occupied vehicle.

Ms. Metheney was arrested last month after violating Florida statute 790.19, which refers to: “Shooting into or throwing deadly missiles into dwellings, public or private buildings, occupied or not occupied; vessels, aircraft, buses, railroad cars, streetcars, or other vehicles.”

 

[Ja's 2¢]

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[stillin729]

I think they got her height and weight mixed up

 

[treystylezpopz]

Smh. I'm dead.

 

[big panda]

LLS

im done

this is too much for me too handle

 

[jkitty]

No, we aren't shooting missles in cars now.

Straight from the link ---- To be fair, Crystal didn’t (necessarily) fire a heat-seeking scud into the vehicle, as statute 790.19 uses the non-military definition of “missile.” The statute seeks to nail anyone who “throws any missile or hurls or projects a stone or other hard substance which would produce death or great bodily harm.”

She probably threw a rock in the car. Nice try at sensationalizing the story though.

 

[patrick bateman]

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Well done.

This ALWAYS has to be the first reply in a Florida thread on NT

 

[htg designs]

Chick look like the blob wit hair. Walter White couldn't even move that meth.

 

[treystylezpopz]

Iight iight. Seriously I had to ask just so I don't pick my brain all day. What kind of got damn missile was this wilderbeast capable of posessing let alone launching.


Lmaoooooo. I'm done I can't eem breev.

 

[jay6jay]

We ain't shouting up schools though

 

[truballa101]

I think they got her height and weight mixed up

Real spit. I saw 505 and I'm like

 

[stillin729]

We ain't shouting up schools though

you guys whisper

 

[rillo561]

Mama June?

 

[truballa101]

We ain't shouting up schools though

You don't gotta yell bro. Take this L and keep it movin

 

[createdestroy]

lol@dudes really thinking he shot a (military) missile... yall taking a bigger L than florida...

bet you think people charged with battery were using a Duracell illegally too

 

[thebsprky]

Son I just had surgery

Can't be putting images like that asap
Hope you know you caused some pain

Missiles? I can't even

 

[mmr31d]

lol@dudes really thinking he shot a (military) missile... yall taking a bigger L than florida...

bet you think people charged with battery were using a Duracell illegally too

I was about to say the same thing.

She could have just thrown a rock.

 

[andretti]

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Bruh **** all the ********


Someone got creative enough to name this lady Chrystal metheny......

 

[djyoung08]

This some GTA type stuff

fLorida is finished

 

[htg designs]

We ain't shouting up schools though

with that spelling, dont look like yall even attending schools anyway

 

[36 ounces]

Dummies actully thinkin' she has possesion of SAMs.

I was gettin' referrals for launchin' jolly ranchers from the school bus sayin they was missles back in 7th grade.

 

[jumpman2314]

We ain't shouting up schools though

with that spelling, dont look like yall even attending schools anyway

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[miniojw]

CRYSTAL METHENEY

 

[beh235]

I thought Sam Kinnison died?

The name too...L's on L's on L's

 

[truballa101]

You don't even gotta read the content of a post.

As long as the title has Florida you midas whale just cue the bugsbunnygif