Originally Posted by
demonbasketball04
The last time I was there for Affliction I, I ended up in the ER the next day, and then on Judge Judy where I had to sue my best friend for my hospital bills (true story). Quite possibly the high point and low point of my life at the same time hahaha.
I'm sorry man, but I'm gonna need the backstory on this, it sounds too funny to be true!!
not my proudest moment to reduce myself to the level of "casual drunken MMA fan" but hey we all make mistakes.
Long story short (cause it is a pretty long story with all the idiotic details)
-Started the day off at the Hooters down the street from the Arena pounding pitchers of beer.
-Walked to the arena from there. Directly across from the arena was a sports bar/restaurant of some sort. We got stuck at the crosswalk waiting for the lightto turn red. Being impatient drunks, we decided we needed another drink before going in so we detoured into the bar. We continued to pound a few beers eachwith tequila and jager chasers (or is it the other way around?)
-Finally make it in the Arena and proceed to make a scene acting like a drunken fool (its a common occurance for me). The undercards start and we are sittingin the rafters. Vitor was fighting... Terry Martin I think? and it was the first time I had ever got to see him in person (never got to see an early UFC showin person, and obviously due to his layoff and fighting abroad the opportunities stateside were limited). I got so excited I almost pooped my pants as I amscreaming like a school girl at the top of my lungs PHEEEEEEENOM!!! WE LOVE YOU!!!!!! I honestly think that I was the only person besides my buddy within a100 ft radius of where I was standing who had any idea who Vitor was. Everyone looked at me like I was a !@%#@% idiot (not that I blame them) but moresurprisingly, no one else was cheering for him as if he was just some other no name shleprock undercard fighter.... odd.
-After Vitor KO's Martin we have to celebrate the victory by making another run at the beer station. As luck would have it, 2 of my other friends who Icame with (but had floor seats) said that there are open seats by them so they bring us down to the floor level so we dont have to watch from the nosebleedsanymore. That calls for another celebration, and the least I can do is buy those 2 friends a round of beer (and myself as well)
-Last fight of the night was Fedor v. Sylvia and after he choked his $%! out with that RNC to finish the fight we are amped up and actin like idiot drunkengorillas as we leave the arena.
-Walking back to the cars, my best friend PJ happens to be walkin about 20-30 ft ahead of me. Me and my other boy are trailing behind and the topic of"do you think I can RNC PJ and put him to sleep?" Being drunk and not of sound mind it actually sounds like it would be funny/fun/good idea so I runup on dude and ambush him. Immediately jump on his back and lock it in tight. He panics as he tries to get me to release the choke and get the eff off him. As soon as I let go and jump off, my short attention span causes me to immediately turn to talk to another of my buddys and I get blindsided by either a hammerfist or a knee right to the side of my thigh. I was completely unprepared for it and it completely buckles my leg as I almost topple over. Granted Idon't have any martial arts training but I'm a pretty fat kid (almost 6'0 195lbs) and drunk as hell so my pain tolerance is pretty high at thatmoment. that being said it feels like the worst damn charlie horse/dead leg I ever had in my life.
-I finally make it home and the dead leg has not gone away. I stumble into the house only to be met by my furious fiancee. She is pissed to all hell that Ihurt myself due to my drunken antics (which is a common occurance). Being the upstanding gentleman that I am, I immediately go with the "blame it onPJ!!! he's the one that blindsided me for no reason!" (i conveniently left our the part about me attempting to RNC him). What a class act I am.
- Wake up the next morning and the leg hurts as bad as it did the night before. I pop a couple vicodin and smoke a bowl to ease the pain as I lay on thecouch. Next thing I know my knee starts to blowup to the size of a softball. Then it becomes the size of a mini basketball. I start to freak out. The paingets increasingly worse and worse and finally I say F it and make a trip to the ER.
- They take xrays to make sure there isnt any breaks, and luckily there isnt. The doc asks me what happened and I tell him the story. He immediately startsto laugh in my face. I wonder why its so funny (who am i kidding, it IS funny for everyone cept me). He then tells me that he was at the fights last nighttoo. In fact he was backstage in Fedor's dressing room. Turns out, another doctor friend of him who happens to be Russian was Fedor's translator forthe weekend, and so he invited this doctor to go with him. Turns out the doc is also an amateur MT fighter and he says that he had the EXACT same injuryhappen to him, except his was legit and he got it from taking one too many low kicks to the thigh during training. Basically he tells me that I am going to beimmobile for atleast a week, and I probably wont get full range of motion back for atleast 3-6 months.... yay....
-conclusion: they put me on crutches and high dose percocet which is very nice. I take a week off work laid up in bed icing my dead leg. I am on crutchesfor about 2 weeks, and it did end up taking close to 6 months to finaly get full range of motion back in my knee/leg. The best part was that as the dead bloodthat had pooled in my thigh begins to drain down my leg, my entire leg turns a deep purple/black color. I'm talking all the way from my buttcheek on downto my foot. My friends call me Longfellow Deeds for a few weeks because at one point my entire foot was swollen and purple/black.
-Judge Judy: Even after my insurance covered their portion, my out of pocket expense for the ER visit was something obscene like $700+. I dont want to pay forit. I dont want my boy to pay for it cause its not really his fault it was an accident. So we concoct this idea to twist the truth a little bit, create abackstory about how we were once best friends but now mortal enemies since he put me in the hospital and refused to pay for the medical bill, etc... etc... Wesubmit it to Judge Judy (since they will pay the settlement if you lose) and immediately get a response. Next thing you know, us idiots end up at Judge Judywhere I get reamed by the good ole Judge for being an idiot. I proceed to make a fool out of myself on national television (i dont really care, i have a veryhigh humiliation threshold) and lose the case. Luckily they still paid us a $500 appearance fee just to show up and be on it. My boy kicks me down a portionof his show fee to help offset my hospital bill. He was super shy about the whole thing and didnt want people to know that we were on it, so what do I do? Itell his cousin who proceeds to tell his entire family and hilarity ensues.
** So it looks like someone uploaded the episode onto Youtube. **
To show all my fellow NTers what a complete %%%%%%* I am here is the link. In defense of my friend (the witness) he was not much of an MMA fan at that timeand thus made sweeping generalizing statements that does no good for the MMA community or the publics perception of MMA.
I dont know how to embed clips but here is the link