Suicidal Thoughts

[balloonoboy]

Hopefully in the three years since this post was made OP was able to see just how gratifying life can be and the suicidal thoughts have subsided.

I have had suicidal thoughts in the past but recently I have been on this continual cloud of elation and euphoria that I have no reason to kill myself. I don't want to give that feeling up. I want to experience it for as long as I can, as much as I can, in as many forms as I can.

 

[solexsup]

i think everyone has those thoughts at least ONCE in their life

this.

 

[mangudai954]

He's blessed to be able to have that point of view. I hope he knows it.

 

[andee]

Man don't do it. I've been there more times than I can count. Two weeks ago I was flat broke trying to squeeze dope out of some old cottons. I'm still broke but I went to detox and been clean for a week now. Trust me, it gets better. I wanted to die but now I feel like I was born again. One day at a time. Peace.

 

[T Lo Sweater]

im not afraid to die. i accept it. its going to happen to me one day and i understand that. but suicide? ive thought about it plenty of times before but i dont wanna hurt myself or my friends/family. especially my mom. just thinking about how that would devastate her is heartbreaking man. and someone always has it worse than u. remember that. its not worth it

 

[currensy]

I've thought about it but never acted on it as you can see.

 

[mycoldyourdone]

It's getting to that point. Mom is really pissing me off about my life.

youre living wrong if you let other people take control of your emotion/life

how about give less *****?

how about listen, nod, be happy/smile and do what ever the **** you wanted to do anyway? ala downey j.r.

dont kill yourself. you dont even know how lucky you are to actually live......

you were one out of millions of sperm from your dads penor man. you were the one who won lol. imagine if he had sex the next day or even finished earlier or later, you might have not been here. there is no reset button, you wont ever come back. you will never relive a better life in another lifetime because you wont exist. you only exist once. #YOEO

 

[julesbeats]

Don't do it fam, stay strong.....

This

And you have to have hope things will get better, they will if you improve on your positive thinking and appreciation for the things you ALREADY have, trust.

 

[mplsdunk]

suicide is for cowards.

i'm saying. first it takes mad balls to end it. second, who am i to judge anyone. i've been very close to people who have almost succeeded in it if they weren't found and rushed to the hospital. you don't know what is going on with people or what condition they might have.

 

[macc e-money]

When my life all crashed down, i didnt really think about it. Just pondered the idea of "what If". Never would do it, especially how FANTASTIC my life turned around. Literally having to DROP everything and take nothing and move. Spur of the moment, started my whole life over with nothing. Went from Hawaii to Las Vegas and now im here and doin the best ever in my life. Soon to fully own my house, car, growing shoe collection, bad *** girl who pays for it all and i literally do NOTHING. i sit back like a fat rat hahahaa. living the golden life like a pimp hahaha. Ive always said with the rain comes the sun.... well when Katrina hit my life, that **** turned around with time.

 

[mplsdunk]

Man don't do it. I've been there more times than I can count. Two weeks ago I was flat broke trying to squeeze dope out of some old cottons. I'm still broke but I went to detox and been clean for a week now. Trust me, it gets better. I wanted to die but now I feel like I was born again. One day at a time. Peace.

MAJOR props bro. glad you're off the h. the worst part is over, i wish the best for you man.

 

[airblaster503]

It's just been getting to the point where my social life is getting dragged from under my feet and all I do is go to school, work and come back home. Don't go anywhere with the few friends that I have and my house is like a big jail cell. I'm trapped inside my own house! I need to **** that is the only solution. I've been going through this for years now. Ever since 2000

Man I can relate to this. My social life has been faltering quite a bit over the last few years, mostly because all my friends live in a different city and it has led to me feeling a pretty big disconnect. I am terrible at meeting new people and don't even feel like investing time in new friendships. Just have to keep your head up man, things will work themselves out in the long run.

 

[loskickking23]

Man I can relate to this. My social life has been faltering quite a bit over the last few years, mostly because all my friends live in a different city and it has led to me feeling a pretty big disconnect. I am terrible at meeting new people and don't even feel like investing time in new friendships. Just have to keep your head up man, things will work themselves out in the long run.

Seems like the older you get the more responsibility you get ,the less social life you have... I'm 36 , and at my age now it's so much I focus on to keep my mind from thinking to much.. Between hobbies , work and tryin to set myself up financially to be good in the future , I don't have time to think about social life.. Keep your mind busy and focus on something.. That may help some people... I have had my dark days in the past but beleive me Fam **** gets better

 

[fade on you]

Everyone has dark days but instead of being a punk get your life together and MAKE it better.

 

[curbsideprophet]

think about how much it must suck to NOT be alive though.......

 

[pepperjackchees]

Been having these thoughts everyday for the past 6-7 months. Smh at me for not knowing how to tie a noose to a ceiling fan.

 

[joepac12]

Suicide is selfish

 

[jonathango]

Been having these thoughts everyday for the past 6-7 months. Smh at me for not knowing how to tie a noose to a ceiling fan.

:\

 

[knowledgebones72]

Every day I think about ending my life. I feel like I've done very thing wrong, and not even in an aggressive way. I never got into a life of crime or got a bunch of girls pregnant or anything major. I just feel like instead of a couple huge mistakes I've just made millions if really small mistakes that led me to a life not worth living. The worst part is I swear I've spent my life just trying to do well and be a good person, but at the end of the day it's like failure is part of my DNA. Like my soul is meant for despair and failure and ill never know what the other side of that is like anyway.

Ive had a lot of issues throughout my life with depression and self harm and suicide attempts since I was a little kid (25 now), and I was actually hospitalized for depression and severe self injury about a month and a half ago (beat the **** outta my own face and slashed my wrists up during a breakdown). I just feel like my entire life I've been trying to be "good", I graduated from college in December and before that had a good job that I was fired from for not graduating college in enough time. Now that I've got a degree it's like I'll never get a job that good again. I'm just constantly failing and constantly trying to improve and constantly being shown that I am and it is just not worth it.

I just feel like my life will end up very badly no matter what. I feel like my destiny is pain and sadness. I feel like deep down something inside of my soul is just wrong, and I am going to fail no matter what, because I'm just a defective person. I was born with something wrong with me and its not tangible but definitely real. I've worked hard and focused and stayed away from bad things and bad circumstances and bad people, but it just doesn't matter. I'm still nowhere in life compared to so many people who have done awful things and have negatively affected everyone around them. I'm just bad at life, can't handle the day to day dealings of regular life, and have no real skills other than for a job that I can no longer seem to get despite my experience and education. I have the worst decision making capabilities and no sense of priority. To put it shortly, I truly feel like I'm a waste of human flesh and life. I have a lot of deep anger and hatred toward myself, and it has only grown more intense as the days of my life have gone by.

The only thing stopping me from taking my grandfathers shotgun, putting it in my mouth, and pulling that trigger is the fact that he consigned my student loans and I would never want to leave him with that kind of debt.

 

[Hunnynutcheerios]

i think at one point or another we have all had these thought some more than others i have had these many times but you kinda have to start and think that its true someone out there has it so much worse and there has to be one aspect of your life thats worth living for and as far as people saying that its cowardly i dont think so it takes a brave person to want to fear death since its one of the most common fears in a human being but it is the most selfish there is at least one person who would be soo hurt and upset if you did..just think about it all and realize that things get better with time 

 

[unknwn]

I saw this thread and thought Powerballin was back

 

[36 ounces]

Every day I think about ending my life. I feel like I've done very thing wrong, and not even in an aggressive way. I never got into a life of crime or got a bunch of girls pregnant or anything major. I just feel like instead of a couple huge mistakes I've just made millions if really small mistakes that led me to a life not worth living. The worst part is I swear I've spent my life just trying to do well and be a good person, but at the end of the day it's like failure is part of my DNA. Like my soul is meant for despair and failure and ill never know what the other side of that is like anyway.

Ive had a lot of issues throughout my life with depression and self harm and suicide attempts since I was a little kid (25 now), and I was actually hospitalized for depression and severe self injury about a month and a half ago (beat the **** outta my own face and slashed my wrists up during a breakdown). I just feel like my entire life I've been trying to be "good", I graduated from college in December and before that had a good job that I was fired from for not graduating college in enough time. Now that I've got a degree it's like I'll never get a job that good again. I'm just constantly failing and constantly trying to improve and constantly being shown that I am and it is just not worth it.

I just feel like my life will end up very badly no matter what. I feel like my destiny is pain and sadness. I feel like deep down something inside of my soul is just wrong, and I am going to fail no matter what, because I'm just a defective person. I was born with something wrong with me and its not tangible but definitely real. I've worked hard and focused and stayed away from bad things and bad circumstances and bad people, but it just doesn't matter. I'm still nowhere in life compared to so many people who have done awful things and have negatively affected everyone around them. I'm just bad at life, can't handle the day to day dealings of regular life, and have no real skills other than for a job that I can no longer seem to get despite my experience and education. I have the worst decision making capabilities and no sense of priority. To put it shortly, I truly feel like I'm a waste of human flesh and life. I have a lot of deep anger and hatred toward myself, and it has only grown more intense as the days of my life have gone by.

The only thing stopping me from taking my grandfathers shotgun, putting it in my mouth, and pulling that trigger is the fact that he consigned my student loans and I would never want to leave him with that kind of debt.

be easy bra....jesus loves you, jus focus and get that guap

 

[thebsprky]

What ive come to understand about the way life works its that its like seasons

some days can be tough and you want out, but you guys gotta realize that there's better days ahead!

think about the seasons

If you were in winter with no warm clothes, and thought about ending your life because it was so damn cold, you're forgetting that eventually summer will roll around!

take it easy and always remember that better days are ahead

One Love fam

 

[gllahone84]

OP do you drink alcohol? 

 

[pepperjackchees]

Gynecomastia has ruined my life. Ever since I became aware of it, I've never had the balls to go up to a girl.