Memorial Day. I’m at my mom’s and I hit him up so I can pick some up on the way home. He tells me he at a bar and he’s chilling with some *******. I really just blew it off. Then he send me of a live pic of a girl flashing him. Even still, I’m not really concerned. I was messing with someone at the time, I was grilling, I just wanted to cop some and go home. So I pull up on the bar and my man I’d **** faced sitting at the table with the girl from the pic earlier and two other girls, a brunette and a blonde. He is all boo’d up with the brunette so I do what any real one would do...I hope, start wingmaning and entertain the blonde. The other girl that was flashing folk earlier is sitting here giving the the hardest, “Really?” look. Whatever, bros before ****. No lie, she was hotter, but the blonde was bad looking at all IMO.
I’m really there for the weed, so I talk him into going to grab it, leaving me and the 2 girls. I’m really ready to go but it’s awkward so I force some conversation. I call the blonde the wrong name, but played if off, I guess. The brunette is engaging pretty hard. Now that I think back on it, she was on her wingman too. We keep drinking and talking, all the while, I’m wondering why I’m still there. Fast forward, shots were bought, someone brought up blow, then the blonde asked us to ride with her to go get some. She was from Atlanta and if you’re ever been to Houston, you know the downtown/midtown area is confusing af. Trying to get on the freeway, she jumps a curb and blows a tire. The moment the tire starts flopping, I’m thinking to myself, “There it is. This is why I’m here..”My weedman was like **** them, I’ll text someone to pick us up. I ain’t gonna do them like that so I check the trunk to see if there’s a spare and Jack. Sure enough, there is. I’ve blown enough tires and been called to change my sister’s tire so many times, I can do it in about 15-20 minutes. I start changing it and the girls are flipping out. “Oh my God, that’s so manly! I’m glad you’re here!” My boy was supposed to be helping me, but he was really just watching the whole time. At some point, the blonde calls me over to thank me, gives me a kiss and the eye. Patience is a virtue lol. I get back over to the over side of the car and dude’s laying on the stomach under the car like he’s finishing up. I step all the way over and he’s just laying there in his phone. I hold back a laugh terribly and say something to make it seem like he was helping. I get the spare on, she gets the blow, and we go back to the brunette’s apartment. We get ready to smoke and realize we don’t have any blunts. The blonde is in the bag at this point, so she decides to go rides with me to get some blunts. I open the door and theres this 5’3 Borat looking dude at the door typing in his phone. He just tries to walk in and I stop him with my finger asking if we know who this guy. The brunette is saying it’s her boyfriend and she doesn’t know why he’s here, he’s saying she texted him to come over. It was a lot of that, I noticed. The brunette would say something wild, the blonde would call her out and the the brunette would act like she didn’t know what was going on.
We go and get the blunts, my boy burns out and the brunette, her b, the blonde and me smoke. Me and the blonde are pretty much just waiting in the brunette and her bf to go to sleep. The brunette gets up and was like, “Yeaaa...y’all can’t stay here..” . IMO that’s kinda effed up. You knew what type of night y’all was trying to have. The blonde was looking ***ed out so I say let’s go back to my place. The brunette gives us some weed, gets my number and sends us on our way. Yadda yadda yadda..I smash. I guess he didn’t really get me laid, but he put me in a position to get laid.
Pics for the beasts:
. Happy Thanksgiving TAN!!
