I was the same way last year - actually for the last few years. How I got over was to vilify my ex and really nitpick all of the things that were wrong with her. How she had her multitude of emotional and mental issues. How I tried so hard to make her see. So so very hard to make her see we belonged together (makes me a little bit queasy even thinking how irrational I acted.) and still didn't get any reciprocity.
By putting her in this light and highlighting her negative attributes I was able to see that I was better off. And that my jumping at her beck-and-call and clamoring for her attention was very dangerous. For a time there - the relationship lasted three years - my identity revolved around satisfying her. I, too, thought she was the one and lost sight of who I was trying to please her. So very poisonous and debilitating. And she didn't even care. She knew I was her puppet. We would break up and make up within the week it seemed. That was our idea of love. Or at least mine.
I still think about her to this day but knowing that another guy actually married her crazy *** after knowing her for less than a year makes it so much easier to swallow (and it further confirms my suspicions that she is a looney) and leave the past the past. I nudged her on Hanging with Friends a few months ago. I dodged a bullet by her not responding. That place was so very dark and cold and desolate - I never want to go back there again. The whole cat-and-mouse of it all. I appreciated the life lesson it taught me, but I seriously wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
You have to face the music, Rock. She is gone. The burden is off of your shoulder. You don't have to live for her anymore. And you for damn sure don't have to hold up the microcosm of a life you too once had together. It's difficult enough bearing the brunt of real life - no need to try to juggle a fantasy world along with it. Relearn and regain who you are, without alcohol. It will be doubly difficult since you're more or less trying to break the primary bond of your ex, but also the secondary bond of the alcohol that helped you cope with your breakup.
It's much easier to let it rule you than it is to stand up and say "I'm not taking this anymore. I want to put this part of my life behind me and move on."
Rock, you can do it. I know you know you can. All it takes is the first step.
galaxy imac
what the hell is going on? The last few pages have been funny. Gamblers, farts, ugly babies awww man it's a good Friday.
this is my favorite edible by far
