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Wiping the butt vol. do you stand or sit?
- Thread in 'General' Thread starter Started by jamie dimon,
- Start date
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AYO
Pause, my G
And I'm talking about the prairie dog jump off. Y'all never had the prairie dog jump off?
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I think its time for some poop stories...
I remember a few years back, I was constipated BAD. Like for weeks.
I was living with my aunt and uncle and it was about 3 in the morning. I tried to go but nothing came out. I then made up my mind that I was going to poop and I was going to poop tonight! Im pushing and pushing and pushing, but nothing. Im sweating, taking 5 mintues breaks in between 20 minute attempts. I would feel the tip breaking but never had enough to get it all out. Finally, like an hour in. I break. The tip his the bottom of the toilet like it was stone and made a loud *CLINK* noise. Im sigh in relief because its finally over.......but its not. It just keeps coming and coming...my mind was done, but my angus gave no dambs. Its was like it was my angus on auto pilot. My brain was done pooping but it was still coming...effortlessly. I stood up, turned around and looked...I promise it was a log the length on my entire lower intestine.......with NO BREAK
.
I tried to flush that thing. The toilet clogged up and flooded the bathroom. Had to wake my uncle to get the plunger, which did nothing. Ended up waking up the entire house trying to get my super log down the commode.
I remember a few years back, I was constipated BAD. Like for weeks.
I was living with my aunt and uncle and it was about 3 in the morning. I tried to go but nothing came out. I then made up my mind that I was going to poop and I was going to poop tonight! Im pushing and pushing and pushing, but nothing. Im sweating, taking 5 mintues breaks in between 20 minute attempts. I would feel the tip breaking but never had enough to get it all out. Finally, like an hour in. I break. The tip his the bottom of the toilet like it was stone and made a loud *CLINK* noise. Im sigh in relief because its finally over.......but its not. It just keeps coming and coming...my mind was done, but my angus gave no dambs. Its was like it was my angus on auto pilot. My brain was done pooping but it was still coming...effortlessly. I stood up, turned around and looked...I promise it was a log the length on my entire lower intestine.......with NO BREAK
.I tried to flush that thing. The toilet clogged up and flooded the bathroom. Had to wake my uncle to get the plunger, which did nothing. Ended up waking up the entire house trying to get my super log down the commode.
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Wait how you gon pause me?
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CRINE.
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BRUH! Too many tears shed and reps given in this thread. I'm CRYING! 
Sitter here.
Sit, scoot forward, lean to the side, front to back, dry, wet, dry, til theres no more brown
Sitter here.
Sit, scoot forward, lean to the side, front to back, dry, wet, dry, til theres no more brown
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really... people stand up? :x
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I think its time for some poop stories...
I remember a few years back, I was constipated BAD. Like for weeks.
I was living with my aunt and uncle and it was about 3 in the morning. I tried to go but nothing came out. I then made up my mind that I was going to poop and I was going to poop tonight! Im pushing and pushing and pushing, but nothing. Im sweating, taking 5 mintues breaks in between 20 minute attempts. I would feel the tip breaking but never had enough to get it all out. Finally, like an hour in. I break. The tip his the bottom of the toilet like it was stone and made a loud *CLINK* noise. Im sigh in relief because its finally over.......but its not. It just keeps coming and coming...my mind was done, but my angus gave no dambs. Its was like it was my angus on auto pilot. My brain was done pooping but it was still coming...effortlessly. I stood up, turned around and looked...I promise it was a log the length on my entire lower intestine.......with NO BREAK
I tried to flush that thing. The toilet clogged up and flooded the bathroom. Had to wake my uncle to get the plunger, which did nothing. Ended up waking up the entire house trying to get my super log down the commode.
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Won't work
You better have Quintuple ply tissue
Thats My Word
formerly derrty6232
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Yeah, for those super long ones, you have to clinch and break it up into smaller pieces, otherwise you risk clogging your toilet. Hah.
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Trill said his "angus was on autopilot"
kdawg
Staff member
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If you're standing up you're doing it wrong. I did that my whole life until about 10 years ago and as soon as I learned there was another way, one try and I've never looked back.
You want to finish the biz and then just rotate 90 degrees so one cheek is on the edge of the front of the toilet and then you've got great access and good spreadage.
Like I said you'll never look back. The only irritating thng is when the TP is on the wrong side - you have to twist around to get it.
You want to finish the biz and then just rotate 90 degrees so one cheek is on the edge of the front of the toilet and then you've got great access and good spreadage.
Like I said you'll never look back. The only irritating thng is when the TP is on the wrong side - you have to twist around to get it.
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you gotta pull your buttcheeks open with the left hand. #NTthick
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bravelude
Banned
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That innuendo.
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Anyone ever whip while wearing a long sleeve shirt and while washing your hands realize you now need a new shirt? :x
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Nope my Supreme l/s never get dirtyAnyone ever whip while wearing a long sleeve shirt and while washing your hands realize you now need a new shirt?
bruhhhhhI think its time for some poop stories...
I remember a few years back, I was constipated BAD. Like for weeks.
I was living with my aunt and uncle and it was about 3 in the morning. I tried to go but nothing came out. I then made up my mind that I was going to poop and I was going to poop tonight! Im pushing and pushing and pushing, but nothing. Im sweating, taking 5 mintues breaks in between 20 minute attempts. I would feel the tip breaking but never had enough to get it all out. Finally, like an hour in. I break. The tip his the bottom of the toilet like it was stone and made a loud *CLINK* noise. Im sigh in relief because its finally over.......but its not. It just keeps coming and coming...my mind was done, but my angus gave no dambs. Its was like it was my angus on auto pilot. My brain was done pooping but it was still coming...effortlessly. I stood up, turned around and looked...I promise it was a log the length on my entire lower intestine.......with NO BREAK.
I tried to flush that thing. The toilet clogged up and flooded the bathroom. Had to wake my uncle to get the plunger, which did nothing. Ended up waking up the entire house trying to get my super log down the commode.
bravelude
Banned
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Not even gonna believe the fake story. post pics
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Y'all ever had a long poop go halfway out ya booty, then you put them muscles to work and suck that **** right back in to see what it feel like on some prairie dog ****. Then push it half out again, suck it back in. It's good exercise for ya PC muscles too for all y'all fast 1 minute boys out there. Push it out and Pull it in about 5 times.
Them daily excercises will Have you bustin nuts in no less than 20 minutes of rough stroking with ya lady word is bond. I wouldn't steer you wrong
Them daily excercises will Have you bustin nuts in no less than 20 minutes of rough stroking with ya lady word is bond. I wouldn't steer you wrong
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