Confessions

The people I want in my life, don't want me back. No direct conflict, they'll just slowly drift off and disappear off the face of the earth. Or maybe it is me that disappears, as I am dead to everyone.

Your just a free spirit meeting different people in your life without commitment, nothing wrong with that
 
I usually don't make posts like these because I hate being vulnerable but I'm tired and need to vent.

I've done a lot to turn my life around and I'm happy with it but certain areas I'm still struggling in and it irks me a lot. I've lost 43 lbs, I got back into school, my confidence has increased with age but my social life is still kinda up and down and I still have more weight to burn and I want a real job but I get discouraged. I'm 25 and I feel like I'm losing time. Wish i had the bread to travel like I want too, I wish I was back in NYC full time, wish I had more friends to hit up and chill with. It sounds lame and I have a lot of pride so I hate saying it but its messing with me mentally so I had to say something. I'm in a weird grey area. I assume its just normal growing pains but I'm always feeling like I'm chasing my wants.

Fire away.
http://www.returnofkings.com/33903/get-your-fire-back

Read that.
 
What are you drinking? And is it the drunkenness or the act of drinking that you enjoy?

Spirits, premix or a bottle. I just enjoy the act of drinking, not so much the drunkenness cos I tend to stop when I get that way, just enough to chill, almost a time killer somedays

Ok, nvm. I thought you were drinking beer, was gonna recommend trying non-alcoholic beers.
 
I usually don't make posts like these because I hate being vulnerable but I'm tired and need to vent.

I've done a lot to turn my life around and I'm happy with it but certain areas I'm still struggling in and it irks me a lot. I've lost 43 lbs, I got back into school, my confidence has increased with age but my social life is still kinda up and down and I still have more weight to burn and I want a real job but I get discouraged. I'm 25 and I feel like I'm losing time. Wish i had the bread to travel like I want too, I wish I was back in NYC full time, wish I had more friends to hit up and chill with. It sounds lame and I have a lot of pride so I hate saying it but its messing with me mentally so I had to say something. I'm in a weird grey area. I assume its just normal growing pains but I'm always feeling like I'm chasing my wants.

Fire away.

25 is still young man.

I'm near 30 and still don't have a steady career. All my friends are getting engaged, married, buying homes and shhhhhh. So I know how you feel in a way.
I'll be engaged soon, but I don't think I'm financially ready to fully commit, but the date coming up next year means a lot to us or maybe wait for the following year.
Might have to rent a place at first... shrug.
 
I usually don't make posts like these because I hate being vulnerable but I'm tired and need to vent.

I've done a lot to turn my life around and I'm happy with it but certain areas I'm still struggling in and it irks me a lot. I've lost 43 lbs, I got back into school, my confidence has increased with age but my social life is still kinda up and down and I still have more weight to burn and I want a real job but I get discouraged. I'm 25 and I feel like I'm losing time. Wish i had the bread to travel like I want too, I wish I was back in NYC full time, wish I had more friends to hit up and chill with. It sounds lame and I have a lot of pride so I hate saying it but its messing with me mentally so I had to say something. I'm in a weird grey area. I assume its just normal growing pains but I'm always feeling like I'm chasing my wants.

Fire away.

1. There's nothing to fire away at, this is a confessions thread fam so don't feel like you're being judged (regardless of the responses).

2. The part about "losing time" at the age of 25 might be because you have a predetermined timeline of where you want to be and when you want to be there which means nothing. I'm 25 as well and sometimes when I think about where I'm at I feel the sense of "losing time" but I always remind myself that I can't worry about the things I can't control and if I can control it then I need to take the energy from worrying and apply it to Change. I also think about the things that I have experienced and achieved in my life thus far, it seems like you have a lot you can think about as well. Use those things to eliminate the discouragement.

3. Throw that timeline out and just live life fam, but just do it wisely.

4. Want to have more funds to travel? What's stopping you from saving? What can put you in a better position to save? Want to move back to NYC full-time? What's stopping you from moving back? What can put you in a better position to move back?
Most of my issues revolve around money. Wasn't making enough to save up what I wanted for things outside of bills...currently looking for a better job. I applied to some schools back home so I'm just waiting to see what happens. And your right about the timeline. I always put myself on a timeline because I became a slacker during high school so I completely acknowledge that I led myself to this and that's why I work so hard to fix it. I just want to make something of myself...I'm trying to be that dude :lol
 
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I 100% believe in God & myself.
Im in love with life and the world
As long as I'm alive, I'm happy
I'm ready baby!!! :hat
 
Lets see. I am supposed to get married next year, but I don't think I'm ready. I was so sure last year, but know I don't know.

I have a girl I am seeing on the side.

I left my job last month for another job, which I just quit last weekend.

I had a second job I was supposed to start Monday but I decided not to take it because it was overnight.

I have about 32K in the bank but I still feel broke, probably cause I'm so cheap.

I HATE spending money.
 
Feels like I'm never gonna finish this damn degree. Its taking forever and I'm getting more impatient every day that passes. 
mean.gif
 
 
Lets see. I am supposed to get married next year, but I don't think I'm ready. I was so sure last year, but know I don't know.

I have a girl I am seeing on the side.

I left my job last month for another job, which I just quit last weekend.

I had a second job I was supposed to start Monday but I decided not to take it because it was overnight.

I have about 32K in the bank but I still feel broke, probably cause I'm so cheap.

I HATE spending money.
why do you have a girl on the side bruh 
 
Feels like I'm never gonna finish this damn degree. Its taking forever and I'm getting more impatient every day that passes. 
mean.gif
short term pain leads to long term gain

hang in there

been ******* with my vices too much lately

picked up cigs again and procrastinating. 

gotta get back on my mentality and grind.

its only december 3rd. pick up that slack folks 
 
 
why do you have a girl on the side bruh 

short term pain leads to long term gain

hang in there

been ******* with my vices too much lately

picked up cigs again and procrastinating. 

gotta get back on my mentality and grind.

its only december 3rd. pick up that slack folks 
I just wanted one last hoorah, but now I don't know how to end it. 
 
My homies are the only thing keeping me going. But I ain't even worried.

My cousin lost his older sister today, I mean, I never really knew her. I known her younger siblings well. But it hurts, cuz I know exactly how he feels. I can only hope our loved ones will meet each other up there.

Even though I've changed mentally and improved myself a lot this year, it's been a ****** year all around for my family and loved ones. Don't take those you love for granted.
 
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Lets see. I am supposed to get married next year, but I don't think I'm ready. I was so sure last year, but know I don't know.
I have a girl I am seeing on the side.
I left my job last month for another job, which I just quit last weekend.
I had a second job I was supposed to start Monday but I decided not to take it because it was overnight.
I have about 32K in the bank but I still feel broke, probably cause I'm so cheap.
I HATE spending money.

You're not ready
 
Last time I drank was the day before thanksgiving. I got belligerent again. No one likes me when I get that way. I accidentally recorded some of my antics and the next day when I saw it I was disgusted. No one else knows about the footage and I deleted it off my phone asap.

Through all my therapy, medications I need to be sober for what might be the rest of my life. I'm 11 days sober now. Plus I don't like it anymore. Drinking, smoking, or popping. I need to better myself even if that means I have to be alone and stay away from enablers aka my "friends". I don't have many left anyway. And I don't care about that.

You don't know how hard it is to find new friends who are about that straight edge life. I want to be able to say I'm 30 days sober. 45, 90, all that.
 
Last time I drank was the day before thanksgiving. I got belligerent again. No one likes me when I get that way. I accidentally recorded some of my antics and the next day when I saw it I was disgusted. No one else knows about the footage and I deleted it off my phone asap.

Through all my therapy, medications I need to be sober for what might be the rest of my life. I'm 11 days sober now. Plus I don't like it anymore. Drinking, smoking, or popping. I need to better myself even if that means I have to be alone and stay away from enablers aka my "friends". I don't have many left anyway. And I don't care about that.

You don't know how hard it is to find new friends who are about that straight edge life. I want to be able to say I'm 30 days sober. 45, 90, all that.

I'm your friend bro.
Recently got taken to a Xmas party where there was mad amounts of alcohol. I was with this chick and I didn't know anyone else either. It was fun. Even though I wasn't drinking.

3 years 8 months and 7 days sober 2day. I got plenty of sober friends
 
Man I'm glad my tolerance for hard liquor is crappy these days cause I was headed that way until I had my daughter. Told my lady I wouldn't drink heavy during her pregnancy and never regained that heavy drinking thirst again :lol
 
Thing is my tolerance is pretty high too I would say. But it starts to get to a point where I don't care about my well being at all once I reach a certain point in drinking. I'm just sad all around right now. No reason to look forward to the next day
 
I havent been to the gym since the Monday before Thanksgiving. :{

I still think about that dumb *** girl from time to time. Yesterday was one of those time. I was so depressed, people at work thought I was physically sick.
 
I am full of HATE right now.
HATE. HATE. HATE. HATE.
How can you not trust your own kids.
How can you abandon your kids.
How can some people be so damn cold blooded man. REAL TALK. I'm int mid 20's and I want to cut my parents OFF COMPLETELY.
I just HATE the holidays

Hi,

Try not to let other people's flaws, disgusting behaviour and actions take effect on who YOU are as a person, allowing them to change you and make you angry, bitter, depressed and full of hate etc

Ultimately this is just bringing you down whilst destroying, consuming you from within.
Warping you into something your not. bringing you down to their level, never give your enemy this satisfaction/victory.
This is very hard to take on and put into practice, especially when you have been hurt deeply by those you thought were closet to you.

Now I don't know what happened with your parents to make you feel this way, would you care to elaborate?

Remember you can't always fix the past, but you can change the future.

Fill your life with people who make you happy, who love you. people you can trust and rely on, who will help you, not hurt you.
Cut out the cancers, tumors in your life.

Emotions are a hard thing to keep in check, to be able to step outside of yourself and take a look back at how they are making you act, think and feel. analyse and make changes for a better quality of life.

I hope this helps you.
 
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I don't need to loose weight but I'd like to cos one day imma have to, may as well do it now before its harder.
But I could die tmoro, so I should eat as much as I can tnite lol
 
I don't need to loose weight but I'd like to cos one day imma have to, may as well do it now before its harder.
But I could die tmoro, so I should eat as much as I can tnite lol


Huh? You don't need to lose weight. I'm confused.
 
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