engagement /marriage thread.

And if he doesn't?
That sucks for him. He's going to have to or I'll be that grumpy father who wants nothing to do with him at parties.
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Whenever I hear a couple talk about being best friends I always find it weird. In some cases, over years and years of growing together, and the circumstances surrounding your relationship, it makes sense that two people deeply in love would become best friends. But for the majority of folks, it seems that it's less about growing into that kind of relationship and more about throwing out that label as some sort of false representation of the quality of their relationship. Folks will be in a relationship just a few years and then all of a sudden you're best friends? To me, that's a different kind of relationship. I've had 3 best friends for almost 3 decades now. I would feel weird even referring to my girl as such. It's a different relationship to me. It's deeper than friendship honestly but at the same time its way more volatile. A real and true friendship isn't going to make you go through the gamut of emotions a relationship will. Your wifey can make you sad, happy, frustrated and angry all in one day. 

Or maybe its just some folks have never experienced real and true friendships and their s/o fill that role for them.
I actually agree with you. I might be the odd one to say this but who throws around the "best friend" word around like it merits something that important in a relationship. There are so many factors now a days that something like that is just a percentage of what makes things really work. Plus friends are treated in such a different manner and mostly cause you see them periodically where as your girl is someone that is with you all the time.
 
I don't want this to sound misogynistic but I think a lot of it has to do with women and how they treat friendships. I've known very many women who looked at friendship as sort of a utilitarian thing. They keep friends for gossip, to make them look better, to share clothes with, go to brunch with, and other ridiculous reasons lol. This is why they often have falling outs with their friends at the drop of a dime when they no longer are useful to them. A relationship should have no bearing on your friendships but we've all seen how some women abandon their friends once they've gotten into a relationship. Especially if there's differences or friction between the friends and their man, or they think their friends pose a threat to their relationship. So then they want their man to fill that "best friend" role. And a lot of times this is where frustration in a relationship comes b/c the woman wants to be everywhere and do everything with her man, and the man often times wants to spend time with his friends decompressing from the stress that automatically comes with being in a relationship. We've seen this play out time and time again. Relationships are hard. Friendships should not be. Kinda why I feel like its dangerous in a relationship to promote your feelings for your s/o as "best friend." Unless, you want to spend all your time with your wifey. Then by all means go ahead lol.
 
Me and my old lady became best friends maybe after 8-9 yrs into our marriage. That **** took time to develop. that thin line between love & hate ....
 
Me and my old lady became best friends maybe after 8-9 yrs into our marriage. That **** took time to develop. that thin line between love & hate ....
That's understandable to me. Over time you can definitely develop into that just due circumstances. I'm moreso talking about when things are new or even just at the fiance/just married stage.
 
My mom and her boyfriend have an odd relationship but it works. My mom is a tough SOB and she needs someone to pretty much fight back with her. She married my dad and the guy was just a nice guy and it didn't necessarily work when it came to discussions and even fighting. My dad would just clam up wanting the arguing to be over and my mom just hated that. So now with her new boyfriend, he has more bark in his bight and she actually says she loves how they argue more efficiently which entails works out on the relationship front. Can you believe that BS?!!! Haha.





It's funny how this thread popped up. I think next month I am finally going to look into getting a ring and then pop the question in December. I hope I can find something in that months time cause I hear it can be hard to get the right ring. It's been a long time coming though. Me and my girl have been together for 7-8 years now. I guess that is a long enough wait.
 
It's funny how this thread popped up. I think next month I am finally going to look into getting a ring and then pop the question in December. I hope I can find something in that months time cause I hear it can be hard to get the right ring. It's been a long time coming though. Me and my girl have been together for 7-8 years now. I guess that is a long enough wait.

Same. Been with my girl for 8 1/2 years. People nag me all the time about proposing as if i never plan to. 2016 may be the year for me fellas
 
^^^^Not sure if you feel this way but I swear I don't think a darn thing will change once I am married. Being with someone for that long is damn near marriage by association. I guess it just makes things legal. I think I'd be more changed when I have a kid.
 
Agreed 100% My girl only wants the ring to make it "official" I dont think being engaged will change a thing at all. Only a minor hit to my pockets [emoji]128516[/emoji]
 
^^^^Not sure if you feel this way but I swear I don't think a darn thing will change once I am married. Being with someone for that long is damn near marriage by association. I guess it just makes things legal. I think I'd be more changed when I have a kid.
 It'll change in that the government is now involved in your business
 
Yeah I spoke to her dad as well, more so to get his advice and yeah in a way his blessing, although he wanted me to marry his daughter for some time now...we got married after 10 years together.
 
Btw anyone considering a destination wedding, perhaps in Punta Cana, hills at me I got the perfect planner/makeup/photography combo...they handle everything and create your dream....just shot a wedding there this past week.
 
Not sure but I can point you in the right direction...it's an offsite destination style wedding...is not your typical cookie cutter resort style, is done in a beach front restaurant, very rustic and sheek, is seriously stunning man....I'm not really sure of the budget...id like to say somewhere between 15-20k but EVERYTHING is handled besides photography for up to I believe 90 guests....this include shuttle transport, DJ, entertainment, food, bar, cake, decor, table menus....if you serious shoot me a pm and we can discuss it further and get you the info of the planner.
 
I swear my parents hate the idea of destination weddings. They are that old fashion asian couple that isn't about that life in paying to fly out to see someone get married. They aren't even going to my cousin's wedding and it's in Missouri. Haha.

20K is a good price but just hard to tell your loved once to pay for airfare and hotel.
 
Are women's families still expected to pay for the wedding or is that tradition out of the window by now?
 
we got married on maui and each family member paid their own way. we did ours for way cheaper than 20k (not including the rings) and have not regretted that decision one bit. money comes in real handy once you have a kid(s), my wife will be completing her masters without having to take out any loans and we have plenty in my son's 529 and money to put a down payment for a bigger place when the time comes. i'd rather put our resources into building a family and our marriage than blowing it all on one day.
 
 
Whenever I hear a couple talk about being best friends I always find it weird. In some cases, over years and years of growing together, and the circumstances surrounding your relationship, it makes sense that two people deeply in love would become best friends. But for the majority of folks, it seems that it's less about growing into that kind of relationship and more about throwing out that label as some sort of false representation of the quality of their relationship. Folks will be in a relationship just a few years and then all of a sudden you're best friends? To me, that's a different kind of relationship. I've had 3 best friends for almost 3 decades now. I would feel weird even referring to my girl as such. It's a different relationship to me. It's deeper than friendship honestly but at the same time its way more volatile. A real and true friendship isn't going to make you go through the gamut of emotions a relationship will. Your wifey can make you sad, happy, frustrated and angry all in one day. 

Or maybe its just some folks have never experienced real and true friendships and their s/o fill that role for them.
I can agree with this response. Well said. It always was weird to me as well. Almost as if people were "forcing" themselves to say that some time. Not saying it can't be true at all, don't get me wrong. But it just seems like sometimes people say it because it is the right thing to say.
 
I swear my parents hate the idea of destination weddings. They are that old fashion asian couple that isn't about that life in paying to fly out to see someone get married. They aren't even going to my cousin's wedding and it's in Missouri. Haha.

20K is a good price but just hard to tell your loved once to pay for airfare and hotel.

Trust me bruh, your loved ones will LOVE IT....they might not like the idea at first, but trust me when is all said and done they will be over the top, when you get married away, you don't expect a wedding gift, so that's about 300$ that can go towards the travel expense, to add to that, it's a vacation with the people you care most about...my in laws were not about that life either and my broinlaw got married at the same place I shot at this past weekend 2 years ago, I'm a person that has attended well over 30 weddings, NOTHING beats a destination wedding bro, my own wedding was over in a flash, literally done before I can actually absorb the experience and I paid about 15k my broinlaw I was in the bridal party and so was my wife, they stood in one of the top Punta Cana Resorts (the hard rock) the expense for me and my wife was about 6k 3 nights at the hard rock, suit and bridesmaid dress and then we stood 4 days extra in the capital, we just planned around their wedding and made that one of our yearly vacations....so did the rest of the guests....that's what people that attend destination weddings do, 2 years later that experience was one of the best times of all our lives...friends and family all together, gettin drunk the days approaching the wedding, crying and laughing with our loved ones tying the knot with an amazing backdrop, getting lit and literally diving in the ocean with the bride and groom drunk AF...unmatched experience and I was just there this past weekend and saw a group of strangers share the same exact experience we did and they loved it...so with confidence I'll say a destination wedding is by leaps better than anything you can pull off locally which will be done and over writhin 8 hours.

This was my bro in laws wedding at the same venue I just shot at.

http://www.shoeboxphotography.ca/hard-rock-hotel-huracan-cafe-punta-cana-wedding-chanel-juan/
 
Another question. I am going to my first ever baby shower tomorrow. What is a good enough gift to give? I have this lotion/bubble bath/ foot scrub package from some years ago I was supposed to give someone but never did. Is that cool for the mother? The father doesn't need a gift right?
 
Another question. I am going to my first ever baby shower tomorrow. What is a good enough gift to give? I have this lotion/bubble bath/ foot scrub package from some years ago I was supposed to give someone but never did. Is that cool for the mother? The father doesn't need a gift right?
dude, the present is for the baby...
 
Another question. I am going to my first ever baby shower tomorrow. What is a good enough gift to give? I have this lotion/bubble bath/ foot scrub package from some years ago I was supposed to give someone but never did. Is that cool for the mother? The father doesn't need a gift right?

Never change bro :rollin
 
I didn't get a direct "father" baby gift at my daughter shower but all the diapers/wipes we got had me :hat at all the money I was saving
 
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