Father's Rights .....

[wayniac211]

nah cause i dont have bm drama at all
also again all my kids live with me
except the oldest

Yeah okay.

So you married the love of your life had two beautiful kids that are in junior HS and your wife tells you she's having a third. You're a little stress because money is tight and another child is going to severely hinder your future financial plans. However, because she's the love of your life and because although is going to be tight you can manage you're happy and dont mention anything. Then, during a routine check up doctors warn you that the child is going to have down syndrome. Now, that expense is not only going to be higher than expected is going to hinder your current kids, and you guys present and future living conditions. You do not want to have the kid but she wants to and both of you guys are extremely set on this issue. Why cant a responsible father have a say so and not only jeopardize his life but his kids life?

It goes beyond your statement ...

Man the **** up and pave a path. You put that seed in. Take responsibility and figure a out a way and not a way out. That’s why women nowadays filled with all this feminazi bs cause men use hella excuses. Sound like a straight up B with all these explanations.

Don’t mean to blast off and sound personal. Just sux cuz there’s young men on this board reading and thinking it’s okay to skeet skeet and dipset because your lady don’t wanna listen

 

[nawghtyhare]

I apologize, what I said wasn't clear. What I meant was me and my girl pretty much split the responsibilities evenly. Also, I don't have kids.

no what i meant was just as a MAN
ur responsible for ur families well being u know
same example i gave earlier
ur the last out of the burning building
ur the last to eat that type of thing
ur making sure the fam is straight
thats what i meant

 

[Deleted member 42060]

nah
our sperm gets attacked the moment they enter a womans body
our sperm is considered a foreign invader
our sperm are in a fight with a womans body to get to that egg

i know but i was assuming in terms of time or age. women have a little more difficulty at later ages and men don’t have much of that issue if they are healthy. old dudes young wifey

 

[nawghtyhare]

Why are you projecting, "Making sure the family is straight" as being a father exclusive responsibility/role?

Yes, I am not denying that the father is expected to be the protector of the family but there are other forms of protection that the mother USUALLY provides that we tend to not even deal with.

Emotional support
The nurturing aspect

Time spent with the child in those initial years/months.

Are you speaking from an unfavorable personal situation?

not projecting
just going by the notion of "man of the house mentality"
like how i tell my son
if something happens to me
ur the man of the house and u gotta take care of ur mom and sisters and make sure theyre ok
the protector and all that thats all

 

[keko jones]

Because you are not physically holding the child. It's really simple, as DCAllAfrican said, "it's one of the natural laws". Until we start having children made in artificial wombs, the final say so in an unborn child's life will always be up to the person carrying the child.

No **** ....

The argument is, if a guy has no said so whether to have/not have the child. Shouldn't he at least be relieved of responsibilities if she decides to have the baby without his consent?

If a woman aborts when he wants to keep it, why no reprocutions?

It shouldn't be. Well she is carrying and you should of have used a condom...

 

[DCAllAfrican]

not projecting
just going by the notion of "man of the house mentality"
like how i tell my son
if something happens to me
ur the man of the house and u gotta take care of ur mom and sisters and make sure theyre ok
the protector and all that thats all

You are only looking at ONE style of protection man.

Men and Women BOTH "protect" the family.

One is a security guard (physical), One is the Guidance Counselor (emotional/social). Both are VITAL parts of making sure the family is SECURE.

I think you are limiting your view of "making sure the family is ok."

So that is why I said, re-think this idea of men having it HARDER.

 

[youngogjosh]

The argument is, if a guy has no said so whether to have/not have the child. Shouldn't he at least be relieved of responsibilities if she decides to have the baby without his consent?

Lol you keep going in circles with your arguments. Don't play the game if you fear the consequences.

 

[nawghtyhare]

Man the **** up and pave a path. You put that seed in. Take responsibility and figure a out a way and not a way out. That’s why women nowadays filled with all this feminazi bs cause men use hella excuses. Sound like a straight up B with all these explanations.

Don’t mean to blast off and sound personal. Just sux cuz there’s young men on this board reading and thinking it’s okay to skeet skeet and dipset because your lady don’t wanna listen

why cant we all just have dialog without taking shots at each other
even if u dont agree
cant we at least hear each others opinions in 1 thread without firing shots

 

[sea manup]

You consent to having a child when you decide to not wear a condom.

Like you cant point a gun at someone, pull the trigger and be like nah I'm not okay with shooting the guy all I wanted to do was pull the trigger.

 

[nawghtyhare]

You are only looking at ONE style of protection man.

Men and Women BOTH "protect" the family.

One is a security guard (physical), One is the Guidance Counselor (emotional/social). Both are VITAL parts of making sure the family is SECURE.

I think you are limiting your view of "making sure the family is ok."

So that is why I said, re-think this idea of men having it HARDER.

i think ur limiting how men protect the family though
men are and can be the emotional/social protectors

 

[Deleted member 42060]

maybe totally unrelated

what is the opinion about women making choices to have kids from a sperm donor bank?

choosing to have kids the way they like,
dudes responsible for that? any rights?

 

[keko jones]

Well I have control over whether or not she will even have the option to conceive so yeah...

If I do hit it raw, it is 100% my responsibility to do so with a woman that I know I can communicate and reason with.

LoL

So using protection is 100% safe. For christ sakes, I thought you had more smarts than this. I'm being serious too.

BC + condom + pull out if you're really that scared of this scenario happening.

what that has to do with the scenario? SMH

 

[cosmiccoffee9]

why cant we all just have dialog without taking shots at each other
even if u dont agree
cant we at least hear each others opinions in 1 thread without firing shots

it's a highly emotional subject that goes into the roots of gender roles and interpersonal power dynamics.

honestly surprised it's going so well.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

maybe totally unrelated

what is the opinion about women making choices out of traits from a sperm donor bank?

choosing to have kids the way they like,
dudes responsible for that? any rights?

Do your thing. If that is what they want, that is what they want. Not a morality issue, if that is what you are asking/suggesting.

 

[nawghtyhare]

maybe totally unrelated

what is the opinion about women making choices out of traits from a sperm donor bank?

choosing to have kids the way they like,
dudes responsible for that? any rights?

i think u waive the rights
when u donate to a sperm bank
im not entirely sure
but legally
after u give it to them
ur not on the hook for anything
legally speaking

 

[sea manup]

maybe totally unrelated

what is the opinion about women making choices out of traits from a sperm donor bank?

choosing to have kids the way they like,
dudes responsible for that? any rights?

Well the dudes who donated to the sperm bank did so knowing they would not be responsible for the child.

And the woman getting the sperm also did so knowing that she would not have dude's support.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

keko jones I can sense your frustration man.

 

[Deleted member 42060]

cool. y’all quoted me before i edited it to make it sound right.

 

[niketalker23]

How is this topic complicated? It’s pretty simple, her body her choice. You can’t force anybody, male or female, do something to their body they don’t want to. She ultimately decides what she wants to do because she’s going to go through it.

If you don’t want babies, don’t have sex. Waiving financial responsibility is laughable. Reproduction IS the biological point of having sex. You know the risks going into it, you know the consequence. If you produce a baby, you’re on the hook for it.

Don’t partake in reproductive activities if you aren’t ready to reproduce.

 

[wayniac211]

why cant we all just have dialog without taking shots at each other
even if u dont agree
cant we at least hear each others opinions in 1 thread without firing shots

It’s all good. I said all that with a smile

 

[sea manup]

LoL

So using protection is 100% safe. For christ sakes, I thought you had more smarts than this. I'm being serious too.

what that has to do with the scenario? SMH

nothing is 100% safe, but if you can preform a simple action that will greatly reduce the risk to under 1% but still not choose to do so because of backwards logic like "its not 100% safe tho" then it still is your fault and your responsibility.

 

[nawghtyhare]

it's a highly emotional subject that goes into the roots of gender roles and interpersonal power dynamics.

honestly surprised it's going so well.

which is fine and cool
but still doesnt mean we have to trade shots
a person is liable not to even listen to ur argument
once u throw a shot
they tend to just reciprocate
and then both u guys instead of having crucial and important dialog
and getting an understanding yall arguing and not hearing each other
specially something like this
my dad was NEVER there for me
my moms never tripped off child support none of that
moms had me when she was 15
besides me having my first at 15 my mom did a great job raising me and my sister by herself
we didnt want or need for anything
and with not having a father
i knew what i didnt want my kids to experience
and i want to always add a new way to look at it
another angle
cause folks always talking down on dads

 

[keko jones]

Lol you keep going in circles with your arguments. Don't play the game if you fear the consequences.

Is cook, you cant comprehend and are just looking at one possible consequence of having a child. Thanks for playing .....

 

[nawghtyhare]

It’s all good. I said all that with a smile

yeah okay.

 

[Deleted member 42060]

parents need a mutual agreement then.

make and sign a clear cut contract that covers before during and after pregnancy of what should happen. it sounds crazy.

i don’t think it’s easy to discuss the reasoning. just some type of solution.