Helping friends with marriage issues

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^ I only agree with the last sentence

 

[stay lurkin]

‘Observe social media’

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Somebody help me out

 

[slighted]

These posts are re-confirming my no-marriage stance.

NT fam comes through once again.

 

[panaricanretro]

Spare yourself the stress and the drama. Any married friends should seek advice from a professional and vent/confide in other friends/family who are or were married. If they ask you just say you're there for them no matter what but not really equipped to give good advice on marriage. They'll figure it out.

 

[a blinkin]

Good looking out NT fam.

Homie hit me up today saying that he’s going to fall back from calling his ex and instead try to have a serious discussion with wife. I told him that was a good idea and that I’d try to have his back as best as I could, seeing as I’m not married and don’t have the best idea as to how to handle situations of that magnitude.

It sucks to have friends who are going through tough times. I remember when my g met his now wife. Dude was on cloud 9 and she seemed to feel the same. Cases like this makes me wonder how things go wrong. Especially in such a short span of time.

 

[Master Zik]

The story is a bit long. You can skip it and just go to the questions if you’re in the tl;dr mood.

Spoiler

In the past four years or so, a few of my potnas have ventured down the aisle. Since then, one’s called it quits and got a divorce. While he was coming to grips with the fact that it wouldn’t work out, he’d hit me up for advice. Bare in mind, I’m not married myself, and my closest friends know I’ve had a string of one failed relationship after another. At the time, he was only about 4 months into the marriage and he seemed to have his mind pretty much made up that he was going to chalk it up. I told him to do what he felt was best, and to be sure whatever decision he made was one he was prepared to live with. Homie got divorced, and said he’d rather chalk it up sooner rather than spending a few years trying to force it to work. Cool.


Fast forward to yesterday, another one of my home boys hits me up saying that he wants to reach out to his ex to get closure from where they left off. Told him it serves no purpose to do so because he’s married now, and rekindling a flame would only bring him unnecessary drama. He uses that as the springboard to delve into the fact that he’s unhappy with his wife, and is sure she’s unhappy with him as well. When he said those things, it reminded me of the previous instance where it seemed like son had his mind made up and was looking for validation. So I reiterated the fact that hitting her up would be purposeless, and told him the same thing I told my other potna (do what you think is best, and be sure that whatever decision you make is one you’re prepared to live with).


Now if I know my homeboy, I’d chance a bet that it’s only a matter of time before he ignores my advice and give shorty a call.

My question to you guys is this:


How do you handle a situation where your married friends ask you for advice, when you yourself have never been married.


To my married NT’ers, do you seek advice or different perspective from your single/dating friends? Do you hold it in high regard when you’re about to make your decisions?

Sleep with his wife.

 

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It sucks to have friends who are going through tough times. I remember when my g met his now wife. Dude was on cloud 9 and she seemed to feel the same. Cases like this makes me wonder how things go wrong. Especially in such a short span of time.

Marriage is a lot of work. You cant buy a new whip and get frustrated when it starts acting up after a while. All you did was put gas in it to get where you need to go. But did you get regular oil changes? Tunes ups? Regular scheduled maintenance? When it got scratched in the parking lot, did you touch up and seal it? Or you left it and the elements peeled more paint away. Whats the tread looking like on the wheels? Did you check the tire pressure? Maintaining all these simple things will keep your car lasting as long as it can and stop bigger issues from arising down the road. The engine light might come on, so check it asap. If you really care about your car, then you shouldnt be so quick to start thinking bout jumping in others.