I Can't Get Laid!

[rachi24]

good ol trolling
***** said icarly

***** I'm serious, me & one ***** watch an iCarly marathon b4.

 

[rachi24]

 
this reeks of troll but in case you're serious, check this out:

http://www.artofmanliness.com/2012/08/22/how-to-make-small-talk/

It sounds like a troll, but trust me bro I have diarrhea of the mouth.

 

[waitwut]

this is where you went wrong fam u think she wasnt smashin another dude within them 5 years?

you are either friendzoned or she is a sloot either way if you guys been talkin about it why dont you just ask her on a date bring her to the crib and smash?

forreal if you KNOW a girl is interested in you and you are interested in her it isnt rocket science fam throw dirty joke in when youre flirting and she WILL get the idea

Yea I know, she had a miscarriage, but I was friendzoned hard bro, but like when I was 20 we talked about like dating and she said she wanted to date someone different, but that summer I lost my Grandpa and I was ******g depressed. And the summer of my Senior year we was supposed to go out, but my mom was cock blocking with her Car.

this is why you a virgin fam you doing it wrong very wrong stop talking to that broad stop talking to any broad that has you in the friendzone
you're never gonna smash if you're friendzoned and you dont wanna smash a bird that had a miscarriage anyway
find you a decent looking girl thats interested in you fam if you click with her just ask her on a date

You need to go out, OP. Dorm parties, apartment parties, clubs and or bars. The more you make your self out and about. The more apt you'll be able to find a interested lady.

I've done it all bro, no success.

the hell you doin fam sitting in the corner and crying? getting ***** is over rated anyway get money instead
eventually the right girl will come along we're all gonna make it brah

 

[illicit305]

lol son said icarly

 

[rachi24]

this is why you a virgin fam you doing it wrong very wrong stop talking to that broad stop talking to any broad that has you in the friendzone
you're never gonna smash if you're friendzoned and you dont wanna smash a bird that had a miscarriage anyway
find you a decent looking girl thats interested in you fam if you click with her just ask her on a date
the hell you doin fam sitting in the corner and crying? getting ***** is over rated anyway get money instead

eventually the right girl will come along we're all gonna make it brah

I've just always held out hope we could be together, but I understand where you coming from.

And no I always dance, and drink when I go out, like a talk to females and ****, but my confidence fails me in the end.

 

[jbpkickz]

Frienzone will never get you laid cancel that *****

 

[216301baller]

Jb!! Where have you been?

 

[waitwut]

this is why you a virgin fam you doing it wrong very wrong stop talking to that broad stop talking to any broad that has you in the friendzone

you're never gonna smash if you're friendzoned and you dont wanna smash a bird that had a miscarriage anyway

find you a decent looking girl thats interested in you fam if you click with her just ask her on a date

the hell you doin fam sitting in the corner and crying? getting ***** is over rated anyway get money instead

eventually the right girl will come along we're all gonna make it brah

I've just always held out hope we could be together, but I understand where you coming from.

And no I always dance, and drink when I go out, like a talk to females and ****, but my confidence fails me in the end.

tbh i think all u gotta step up that sext game or somethin u gotta let these broads know u want the yambs

 

[Coromanti]

TAY

pretty good thread.

 

[rachi24]

tbh i think all u gotta step up that sext game or somethin u gotta let these broads know u want the yambs

appreciate it fam, I just don't wanna tell my kids dad was a virgin til his mid 20s you know.

 

[Top Boy]

Spoiler: Warning: Spoiler!

 

[jesusshuttlesworth34]

There are no excuses to not being able to get laid in College.....unless one isn't into that sort of behavior.


Looking for love and looking to get laid or two different trains of thought.....don't mix them up or misconstrue them.


People fall into p**** in the dining hall, dorms, and library. Just make yourself accessible.

 

[Based Jesus]

1. Stop listening to Drake.

2. Forget about your first love bruh. As of now you're just friends. Don't treat her like anything else. Don't be having dreams about piping. You known each other for 5 years and it ain't happened so it ain't happening at all. Continuing to simp will get you nowhere.

3. Act like you're the **** and ******* will believe it. The numbers will flow in and at least one girl will give you the P within a month of getting her digits.

4. Wrap it up.

May Basedgod be with you on your endeavors.

 

[mangudai954]

good ol trolling
***** said icarly

 

[rachi24]

 
1. Stop listening to Drake.

2. Forget about your first love bruh. As of now you're just friends. Don't treat her like anything else. Don't be having dreams about piping. You known each other for 5 years and it ain't happened so it ain't happening at all. Continuing to simp will get you nowhere.

3. Act like you're the **** and ******* will believe it. The numbers will flow in and at least one girl will give you the P within a month of getting her digits.

4. Wrap it up.

May Basedgod be with you on your endeavors.

Will do! Thank You BasedGod!

 

[mw2889]

 

Spoiler: Warning: Spoiler!

That gif is too much lol

 

[Top Boy]

Didn't read OP now, so here's some advice..

1) It's not that serious. I think the biggest pitfall dudes have towards females is overreacting and over analyzing their approach and execution. Women are not magical unicorns.. They're just like you, minus an external sex organ and on top of that, most are simple minded.

2) Read body language. You said you have had girls like you before but can't close the deal.. Did you pay attention to any non-verbal queues? And on top of that, be bold bruh.. Don't hesitate to make that first move. If you're denied, thank god you didn't waste months figuring that out, and if you're approved, well a win is a win.

3) Don't focus all your attention on one girl. You never know how these situations will pan out no matter how good your game is.. You don't want to invest all your time in one female just for her to fall through and you end up assed out. It's about to be winter bruh, you need to begin your draft picks.

4) BE YOURSELF. You need to develop some god damn confidence if you plan on ever losing your virginity. Stop giving a damn what everyone thinks about you and start living for yourself and thinking of yourself in the highest regard. I can talk to anyone like I've known them my entire life, and you can too.. Everyone can. It's within all of us. Break out of your shell homie.

If you have any questions or need guidance feel free to PM me or just hop in TAY.. You will always learn something new in that thread.

 

[createdestroy]

throw all your drake CDs away

 

[jesusshuttlesworth34]

Replace Drake with The-Dream.....

 

[sohoguy]

Replace drake and the dream with The weeknd, then once ya heart gets numb because you don't care for women other than for sex, thank me later, you finally became a man

 

[guzzy]

Replace Drake with The Weeknd

Fixed it for you pleighboi.

 

[lord disick]

don't be so nice...talk less..come off like you wanna smash but don't  be a creep...easy money

 

[jesusshuttlesworth34]

I like Abel a lot, but I think he might get you even more caught up in your emotions.......



But whatever soundtrack gives you the confidence and vibe you need....Go with it.



Give yourself some credit as well, don't put females on a pedestal. There are just ordinary people too. Nothing special.

 

[flaminhotcheeto]

This has to be a troll post.  Vagina falls from the skies nowadays.  Chicks arent exactly playing hard to get anymore. 

 

[aNYone]

Replace Drake with Suga free and Too Short

Now its fixed