i'm 22 and starting to see marriage taking off around me...

[pharelfor3]

this thread. lol

Ont he real when I was 24-26 I saw people getting married left and right. most of them are still together. Now that i'm 30, family is pushing me from all sides to settle down and marry some broad. Aint happening till i'm 40.

 

[patrick bateman]

22 now.. Wanna get married around 32-35. 

 

 

[jking0821]

I'm 24....i never understood the concept of marriage when you break it down.  Made a thread about it a long time ago on here.  

 

[ryair max 1]

24 here.

of my 4 or so really good friends from growing up, 2 are married, and one is engaged (wedding is next summer).

1 has a kid (almost 3), and 1 has a kid on the way. one was Navy the other is Marine Corps.

the only other single one will probably be the next to fall because he is the settling down, stay in one place type and after he finishes his degree, I could see him trying to find a wife.

 

[bruza]

29 here and my career is VERY well underway. 

Years ago, I set 30 as my age to get married.  Nowadays I couldn't tell you.  It really doesn't excite me.  My gf just moved back to UT last week (I live in WA) and we still need to decide how that will pan out .  She is 31 but still in school. 

I'm at the point now where I could get married but it would have to be "right".  I refuse to get married if the chick is not established.  I have worked hard to get where I am (already well into the 6 figure range) and will not settle. 

Several of my friends have not married yet but I see that changing in the next 2-3 years. 

 

[antbanks81]

Originally Posted by ricky409

its crazy fambs...
i got homeboys and old jumpoffs getting married and what not...

my girl is 24 and she's seeing it more than me.

i just dont think marriage is for me, and whenever i say that, people say i'm just immature and it will change in the future...

i dont really know how to explain that immaturity aint the case... i'm sure i'll find someone i want to share my life with...

i'm just not up for all the government interference. plus, marriage seems like my spouse would gain alot while i lose alot...

please tell me i'm not trippin, NT fambs... i dont want to get married... but if i do, it will not pop off till i'm in my 30s ...

i dont think i'm immature for thinking this... i just need reassurance that i'm not alone.

DONT DO IT! YOURE TOO YOUNG! THE MAJORITY OF MARRIAGES STARTED IN THE EARLY TWNTIES FAILS! YOU GOT PLENTY OF LIVING AHEAD OF YOU! WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT

  

 

[xairmaxinx]

It's not for me either man. I can't put that much trust and faith in a woman. All it takes is one bad night, one bad fight, and a little alcohol to destroy something that was there for 10 years. Too much of a risk.

 

[sundoobie]

Don't worry about it.  You get married and have kids to pretend you're living this American dream.  That is until you wake up with a cheating wife who has no problem divorcing you and making you pay 50% of your income for child support and/or alimony.   That's really the end result of a majority of marriages.  Why do you think there are so many single MILFs out here?  

 

[krazy88s]

Originally Posted by SunDOOBIE

Don't worry about it.  You get married and have kids to pretend you're living this American dream.  That is until you wake up with a cheating wife who has no problem divorcing you and making you pay 50% of your income for child support and/or alimony.   That's really the end result of a majority of marriages.  Why do you think there are so many single MILFs out here?  

Well...damn.

 

[blackredxiiigoat]

Originally Posted by GrimlocK

Originally Posted by shatterkneesinc

open your heart and dont be afraid

This literally made me laugh out loud.

 

[pacmagic2002]

WHy do you have a girl then?

quit acting and either let her go or marry her if its been longer than a year

 

[eashawty]

im 21 & im seein my peers startin to get married too, or at least makin steps into marriage wit serious long term relationships. i guess folks just growin up, we aint really kids no more 

 

[troymcclure]

I'm 22 as well. You're just in a stage where it is not for you right now. But, most likely as phases tend to do, it will change.
I feel the same way as you. I think women are ready for marriage earlier. Men like to spend more time on pursuing their interests around this time and women are looking to start a "life" - as if they don't already have one.

 

[lana85]

Marriage isnt for everyone. I know people who said they never want to get married and met someone special and ended up getting married. Then theres people who want to get married but never do. Its different for everyone. You're still young so you have time.

 

[wcghost]

*cues Young, Wild & Free*

OP i feel ya brah, especially living in a nation where the divorce rate is 50-60%.

i have so many friends in the same age range (22-24) that are already getting married and having kids.

Y U SO RUSH?!?

 

[|A-Man|]

I don't see it for myself either. You shouldn't be worried about this at your age anyway. I can bet you the majority of your friends doing this will be divorced shortly or be in 7+ year terrible marriages.

 

[ricky409]

Originally Posted by ceemcee

Yeah, OP mentioned that his girl is "seeing it more" since she's older than him.
Not that she's nagging him about it.

But I feel you completely OP.
My close friends are all unmarried and no kids just like me, but we have those homeboys and homegirls who we're cool with who are starting to settle down.
Starting to have kids.
Starting to look for houses and whatnot.
It freaks us out man, really.
Being married with kids doesn't make you mature.
And not being married, not having kids doesn't make you immature.

but how do you relay this to the people around you?
its like, they think its stepping into adulthood, and if you dont get married, you're just a lil boy.

i'm like, do you SEE the divorce rates in this country??

it seems like people are more concerned about the front end than the long haul.

and the crazy part is EVERYONE thinks that THEIR stuff is different... 

i wonder what the divorce rates are by age... THAT would be an interesting find.

Originally Posted by pacmagic2002

WHy do you have a girl then?

quit acting and either let her go or marry her if its been longer than a year

lettuce try to be cereal here.

 

[josednk1068]

Originally Posted by ksteezy

DC I don't see where he mentioned where his girl stands on all this, are you a wizard?

This, DC made all types of blind assumptions just to make his point ...

  

 

[troymcclure]

worse comes to worse you part ways due to differences. OH NOZ, right? big whoop

 

[ksteezy]

You guys setting projected dates of when you are getting married and those completely opposed to the idea, I have one question....are ya even in a committed relationship???...are you in love?....is like some of you think is a switch you hit, "ok I'm ready, come forward women...marry me" or like the thought of marriage should even cross your mind if you haven't fallen in love or are even in a committed relationship...there are a lot of variables that should influence your decision...but definitely not the fact that all your friends are doing it....marriage is something that should only be influenced by what you and your significant other feel for each other, not even the children you might have should have anything to do wit the decision.

 

[rocky437]

Originally Posted by bruza

29 here and my career is VERY well underway. 

Years ago, I set 30 as my age to get married.  Nowadays I couldn't tell you.  It really doesn't excite me.  My gf just moved back to UT last week (I live in WA) and we still need to decide how that will panout .  She is 31 but still in school. 

I'm at the point now where I could get married but it would have to be "right".  I refuse to get married if the chick is not established.  I have worked hard to get where I am (already well into the 6 figure range) and will not settle. 

Several of my friends have not married yet but I see that changing in the next 2-3 years. 

What do you do?

 

[lou baton]

You're not alone. I was with my ex from age 22 til 29. I always knew that I never wanted to get married but I did it anyway. It only lasted a year. I say I'll never do it again but I get told all the time I'll change my mind. And hey, maybe I will but I am perfectly content spending my life in a monogamous relationship without a piece of paper to prove my love.

 

[iblink]

I'm not big on the idea of marriage in the sense of having a big ceremony, going through the legal ramifications, the thought of having to possibly go through a divorce, etc. But at 23, I'm becoming more open to the idea of having one person in my life with whom I can share different life experiences with. Like having a legit partner for this whole game we call life thing. Not ready for kids or anything like that. I just want someone I can enjoy being with, I guess.

But I don't think that equates to immaturity. If anything, you're being mature in the sense that you're allowing yourself to make your own decisions rather than adhering or conforming to convention.

But that's just me. Money over @+*+!%+, and what not.

 

[PRIME]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Originally Posted by ksteezy

Make your own decisons based on what you feel, if marriage is not for you, then don't get married...why should it matter that everyone else around you is doing it.

Because maybe his girl will use that as a reason to constantly nag him about something that he doesn't really want to do. People around him can influence his world, let's not be naive man. 
And of course you will say, "Just ignore her" but if everyone around him is getting married and his girl wants to get married and he keeps ducking and dodging it, either two things will happen.

A. He will drop her.

B. He will give in.

So again, you can't just say, "Don't worry about what others around you are doing."

So you're saying he should give in and get married even though he doesn't want to? 
Dancing around the ultimatum will do nothing but prolong reality. If he doesn't want to get married then someone is going to be hurt at the end of the day.

You CAN'T worry about what others around you are doing. That called peer pressure.. Its his life, not theirs. 

 

[bruza]

Originally Posted by SunDOOBIE

Don't worry about it.  You get married and have kids to pretend you're living this American dream.  That is until you wake up with a cheating wife who has no problem divorcing you and making you pay 50% of your income for child support and/or alimony.   That's really the end result of a majority of marriages.  Why do you think there are so many single MILFs out here?  

A bit extreme here but for reasons like this, marriage SCARES me.  Especially with the current divorce rate and sense of entitlement I see from a lot of females.  Just doesn't seem right to me that in talking with co workers that they either have to give up a house, retirement or pay $$$ for "spousal support" post divorce. 

Pre-nup ftw!

It would eat me alive to have to support an adult after divorce.  Just doesn't seem right to me.