More Women are giving their Husbands hallpasses

[ninjahood]

http://nypost.com/2016/04/14/why-more-women-are-letting-their-husbands-cheat/

Why more women are letting their husbands cheat



By Jane Ridley April 14, 2016 | 3:59am
Why more women are letting their husbands cheat
Relationship coach Suzie Johnson says she has more clients than ever who give their husbands permission to cheat, as long as it's on their terms. Photo: Shutterstock
Thrashing out the details of their new marriage contract with online relationship coach Suzie Johnson, the wealthy couple who have been wed for 12 years leave their hourlong Skype session feeling satisfied.

The husband agrees they can have a fifth child — while the wife consents to an infidelity clause allowing him to cheat with other women on a strictly annual basis.

“They agreed to a weekend amnesty, where the guy can do what he wants for just one weekend a year,” recalls Johnson, who runs the Dallas, Texas-based goasksuzie.com. “In return, she gets the bigger family she craved.”

According to Johnson, such arrangements are increasingly common in her practice as a growing number of women agree to “widen their monogamy boundaries” and embrace a marriage of convenience, where it’s just the husband who strays rather than an open marriage where both sides cheat.


Linda Jones and Tom JonesPhoto: Popperfoto/Getty Images
It’s a fascinating trend that came into the spotlight this week with the death of 75-year-old Linda Jones, superstar Welsh singer Tom Jones’ long-suffering wife, who put up with his legendary philandering for 59 years.


Hillary and Bill ClintonPhoto: Splash News
Well-known public figures in similar situations include, most famously, presidential candidate Hillary Clinton, as well as Masha Lopatova, spouse of former NBA player Andrei Kirilenko. The mother of four admitted in 2006 that she sets the 6-foot-9 Russian-born athlete “free” once a year so he can sow his wild oats.

Citing 2013 study research that shows more than 50 percent of marriages survive infidelity, Johnson explains: “Fifteen years ago, having an affair would be a deal-breaker, but people now realize that it’s not the end of the world. It’s tough in the initial stages, but many see it as an opportunity to make a fresh deal.

“The more invested you are in your marriage — whether because of love, lifestyle, finances, children or a combination of those things — the more likely you are to make compromises [such as allowing the husband to cheat] to anchor the commitment.”


Masha Lopatova and Andrei Kirilenko
Rather than taking the open-marriage route popular in Europe, in America, it’s usually a case of “don’t ask, don’t tell,” where the wife turns a blind eye to the man’s peccadilloes. Another option, as psychotherapist Joe Kort asserts, is the “eyes wide open” approach that involves a written contract full of rules.

“For example, the woman might agree that the man can attend BDSM play parties once a month or have oral sex — not penetrative sex — once a week, so long as he has blood tests every three months,” says Kort, of Detroit, who often advises clients in mixed-orientation marriage — with one straight spouse and one who’s gay.

Pittsburgh-based former HR executive Sophie, 61, who asked that her last name be withheld to protect her privacy, fits into that category. When her physician husband admitted to a same-sex fling during a business trip in 2006, she remained by his side. “He said it was a mistake, and he was confused by his sexuality,” Sophie tells The Post.

Then, two years ago, he dropped the bombshell that he now considered himself gay and was actively seeking other partners.


Suzie JohnsonPhoto: Brad Johnson
“When it first happened, I thought I was going to lose my mind,” admits Sophie, who last had sex with her husband in the fall. “But, with help from Joe [Kort], we’ve figured out our arrangement.”

The couple, who have no kids, recently bought an apartment in New York City to serve as the husband’s love nest. Other times, Sophie visits the condo when she wants to catch a Broadway show.

So what made her decide to stand by her man? “We’re still very much in love and we have a rich history together,” says Sophie, who has been married for 33 years. “My parents are elderly, and I don’t see any point in telling them and hurting them by getting divorced.”

Other factors include the duo’s comfortable lifestyle in the Pennsylvania countryside and their devotion to their two dogs. But it’s been a difficult road, especially after Sophie confided in her sister and a rigidly Christian friend.

“They are very judgmental and think there is only room for two people in a marriage,” she says. “But, as Joe counsels me, you get to write your own story, and nobody can tell us how to live our lives.”

 

[Mark Antony]

The older I get, the less I see an issue with these and think they may be kinda healthy if done right. But i'd pass, I don't want my wife asking for a hall pass in return.

 

[Xennial]

Horrible deal for that dude, 5 kids just for 1 weekend a year?  horrible deal

 

[slighted]

Just don't get married.

This article basically confirms it's a business transaction.

 

[doozy122]

The older I get, the less I see an issue with these and think they may be kinda healthy if done right. But i'd pass, I don't want my wife asking for a hall pass in return.

So it's only "healthy" if YOU get to cheat. Smh.

 

[mastamind033]

Sophie is delusional

 

[dman22193]

Somebody give me a good reason to get married. As a young lad I can't understand voluntarily signing that contract..

 

[$tacy]

[emoji]128522[/emoji]

 

[gentrification]

It fails to mention what these wives are doing on the side. 

 

[sharpshooter718]

 
Horrible deal for that dude, 5 kids just for 1 weekend a year?  horrible deal

 

[6 Rings G.O.A.T.]

It fails to mention what these wives are doing on the side. 

Because they're doing somebodies..

 

[mvp07]

I guess Lebron got that pass as well


on a related note, does the wife get a pass too? If that is the case, then I don't see most dudes agreeing with that . It could beneficial to some.

 

[tr1ll]

Somebody give me a good reason to get married. As a young lad I can't understand voluntarily signing that contract..

Of course you dont.

The older I get, the less I see an issue with these and think they may be kinda healthy if done right. But i'd pass, I don't want my wife asking for a hall pass in return.

That.

 

[son nelly]

Its all cool until she wants the pass. No point in even setting yourself for that.

 

[the qbz]

Rant
This imo making dudes punkish. I know cheating wrong but tha5 takes a conscious ballsy decision to do but to lay down you maleness to ask to cheat.... which could or would come back on you in the vindictive women era. Trash

Why get married to later ask for permission to cheat.

 

[Fozz]

 
It fails to mention what these wives are doing on the side. 

Because they're doing somebodies..

They're offering hall-passes because they're probably getting blown out good and probably feel bad for their 'husband'. 

If you can't commit to a marriage, don't get married. Simple as that.

 

[ninjahood]

Just don't get married.

This article basically confirms it's a business transaction.

More like a tax credit, same effect thou...

 

[Xennial]

More like a tax credit, same effect thou...

 

[Fozz]

 

Yup. We had to pay taxes this year. lol. So bummed.

 

[Xennial]

 
Yup. We had to pay taxes this year. lol. So bummed.

 

[son nelly]

This is kinda like what Athlete wives do. Because they know the husband will be getting road tail, and will put up with it for the benefits are long as they aren't sloppy and embarrass the wife by getting caught.

But if y'all making the same kinda money, she's giving you pass because she's getting that side D herself.

 

[Mark Antony]

The older I get, the less I see an issue with these and think they may be kinda healthy if done right. But i'd pass, I don't want my wife asking for a hall pass in return.

So it's only "healthy" if YOU get to cheat. Smh.

Your comprehension is off base, that's not what I said. "If done right" implies that both parties agree, are comfortable and are getting what they both want out of the agreement, no built up resentment because it's one sided. This could include her getting hers too. Just saying for me, that ain't my version of marriage, but I can see it working between two folks fine with it.

 

[Based Jesus]

Simplest solution is to not get married.

 

[23kidd]

single for the rest of my life FTW

 

[Mark Antony]

It's easier to get different box to feed the beast and be done with, but the level of care that someone devoted to you can provide is a little different. It's a case of having your cake and eating it, If a couple has ascended to that plane of trust and openness, it could work. Not for me though.


Or marry a bad young *****.