NT : would you mess with a female that has a kid ?

[ro ro 8]

I met this chick about a month ago. She applied at my job and I took her application, and she happened to be a friend of a friend's on facebook.
So we started talking and I saw her as a potential serious girlfriend so I got her a job at another location. I did that to protect myself since I talk to girls all the time at work and I wouldn't want to mess it up with her.
So anyway I would say that we are an item as of now. I've taken her on several fancy dates, she's stayed over my crib a couple times. My mom likes her and she is attractive and independent.
Yesterday we were at the mall shopping, and she was paying at the candy store, and i saw a baby picture in her wallet. It turns out that it is her kid. She has a 2 year old daughter.
She lives with her kid and her mom, and the father is a deadbeat bum. I was shocked and quiet for the rest of the day, and she sensed that something was wrong.
I don't know why but her having a kid just shocked the hell out of me, I didn't think I would take it this way but I see it as a big deal. I'm 20 and she's 21

So NT , could you be with a girl that has a kid? I'm ready to drop this chick

 

[mondaynightraw]

nope

 

[ro ro 8]

I met this chick about a month ago. She applied at my job and I took her application, and she happened to be a friend of a friend's on facebook.
So we started talking and I saw her as a potential serious girlfriend so I got her a job at another location. I did that to protect myself since I talk to girls all the time at work and I wouldn't want to mess it up with her.
So anyway I would say that we are an item as of now. I've taken her on several fancy dates, she's stayed over my crib a couple times. My mom likes her and she is attractive and independent.
Yesterday we were at the mall shopping, and she was paying at the candy store, and i saw a baby picture in her wallet. It turns out that it is her kid. She has a 2 year old daughter.
She lives with her kid and her mom, and the father is a deadbeat bum. I was shocked and quiet for the rest of the day, and she sensed that something was wrong.
I don't know why but her having a kid just shocked the hell out of me, I didn't think I would take it this way but I see it as a big deal. I'm 20 and she's 21

So NT , could you be with a girl that has a kid? I'm ready to drop this chick

 

[mondaynightraw]

nope

 

[eaalto]

Not at age 20.

 

[tim teufel]

I don't descriminate.if its to smash why not but relationship Nah

 

[tim teufel]

I don't descriminate.if its to smash why not but relationship Nah

 

[eaalto]

Not at age 20.

 

[kilojules64]

I couldn't be with a guy who has a kid, just because I wouldn't be able to see myself making a future with him and having the baby's mother coming around all the time knowing that he used to smang her

 

[kilojules64]

I couldn't be with a guy who has a kid, just because I wouldn't be able to see myself making a future with him and having the baby's mother coming around all the time knowing that he used to smang her

 

[beacon ave south]

So you've been on multiple dates, introduced her to your mom, and not once did she mention her kid? I dunno fam she sounds sketchy. To answer your question, mess? yes. Date? nah. Seeing as the both of you are young, you dont wanna deal with that baby daddy/momma drama.

 

[beacon ave south]

So you've been on multiple dates, introduced her to your mom, and not once did she mention her kid? I dunno fam she sounds sketchy. To answer your question, mess? yes. Date? nah. Seeing as the both of you are young, you dont wanna deal with that baby daddy/momma drama.

 

[hellaones]

currently doing so but we're not that serious and I have minimal interaction with her kid

 

[hellaones]

currently doing so but we're not that serious and I have minimal interaction with her kid

 

[illmaticsoulchild]

I feel sympathy for single mothers in their youth. Most men try to take advantage of them and the ones that are genuine have no clue what they're getting themselves into.
Really, only a single father can understand the plight of a single mother.

With that said, if you're not comfortable with the situation, leave her. It'll be for the best (for both of you).

 

[canifly34]

My momma always told me to never mess with a chick who has a kid, so no. For your situation though, if you've been on multiple dates and she hasn't said anything about it then I'd say just to stay away. You found out from looking at a pic... Cmon son

 

[illmaticsoulchild]

I feel sympathy for single mothers in their youth. Most men try to take advantage of them and the ones that are genuine have no clue what they're getting themselves into.
Really, only a single father can understand the plight of a single mother.

With that said, if you're not comfortable with the situation, leave her. It'll be for the best (for both of you).

 

[canifly34]

My momma always told me to never mess with a chick who has a kid, so no. For your situation though, if you've been on multiple dates and she hasn't said anything about it then I'd say just to stay away. You found out from looking at a pic... Cmon son

 

[veryanalytical85]

Can't do it unless I had a kid.
Call it selfish or whatever. But the kid isn't my biological responsibility. On top of that, it's difficult getting over the baby-daddy drama from the first guy (had experience from this before). All I could say is OP, do what you feel is comfortable. If you see yourself in the long run with this chick, go for it. If not, then detach yourself before it gets too intimate.

 

[furrell]

Why wouldn't she tell you that she has a child? Having a relationship based on lies seems to be popular now.

You're 20 years old, you shouldn't tie yourself down this early.

Also, I don't want to have any drama with her baby's father. I'm not trying to become a victim because of their drama.

 

[zk1mpls]

Originally Posted by eaalto

Not at age 20.

 

[zk1mpls]

Originally Posted by eaalto

Not at age 20.

 

[veryanalytical85]

Can't do it unless I had a kid.
Call it selfish or whatever. But the kid isn't my biological responsibility. On top of that, it's difficult getting over the baby-daddy drama from the first guy (had experience from this before). All I could say is OP, do what you feel is comfortable. If you see yourself in the long run with this chick, go for it. If not, then detach yourself before it gets too intimate.

 

[furrell]

Why wouldn't she tell you that she has a child? Having a relationship based on lies seems to be popular now.

You're 20 years old, you shouldn't tie yourself down this early.

Also, I don't want to have any drama with her baby's father. I'm not trying to become a victim because of their drama.

 

[jdi23]

I have before and that s$%^ is not worth it if you are young. As a youngin you would like to start a family with a female not go into a situation that has already been created.

You will never be first. Her kid will always have top priority. Finding a sitter and all of that gets old.

You will eventually get tired of waiting and move on