antonlavey
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- Oct 13, 2008
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Originally Posted by SoleWoman
im ecstatic that you find that funny.Originally Posted by Phil Le0tard0
Originally Posted by SoleWoman
usually im by myself so sleep and cry the day away.
Originally Posted by SoleWoman
usually im by myself so sleep and cry the day away.
thank youOriginally Posted by rsdplaya
Originally Posted by SoleWoman
usually im by myself so sleep and cry the day away.
oh my goodness, that's terrible to hear...you can spend Christmas with my fam.
rsdplaya:
SoleWoman:
usually im by myself so sleep and cry the day away.
oh my goodness, that's terrible to hear...you can spend Christmas with my fam.
I've been offered this a billion times over the years with different holidays. "Oh my gosh! Really? Well you can definitely come chillwith me and my family!"
I'm not going to speak for SoleWoman, but for me, it never helped. Look, some things can't be fixed. Somethings can, and some things can't. The sadness isn't usually derived from loneliness; we're not sad because we're by ourself. The sadness isfrom our families being too effed up for the holidays to matter.
And honestly, what makes me feel better every holiday season is seeing people with less-than-perfect families still in appreciation of each other.
Don't take your family for granted. You might hate your fake a&# cousin and you might want to strangle your brother and you might not want your drunkunkle around, but I'd trade so much to be with family every holiday season, spending time with the people I grew up with, year after year after year, BSingabout all the crap that's happened in the last year.
Originally Posted by SoleWoman
thank youOriginally Posted by rsdplaya
Originally Posted by SoleWoman
usually im by myself so sleep and cry the day away.
oh my goodness, that's terrible to hear...you can spend Christmas with my fam.
since everyone else is laughing @ me
poker. lots of it.Originally Posted by 23ska909red02
What are you doing this Christmas, Club?
Forgive me if you've already answered.
Originally Posted by 23ska909red02
So, you'll obviously be with other people (I don't play poker, but I'm assuming they still haven't come up with a one man poker game.)
Pretty easy to criticize someone else who's going through something that you're not.
"If you judge people, you have no time to love them."
"When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself."
"We evaluate others with a Godlike justice, but we want them to evaluate us with a Godlike compassion."
Originally Posted by 23ska909red02
First, I see you assuming she's looking for sympathy. She certainly never said she was seeking it. Has it ever crossed your mind that some people have sad answers... because they're sad? That's not necessarily a cry for attention. Even though it can be a cry for attention, that doesn't mean that it is. If I'm sad and I want to answer, my answer is either going to be true (which would be 'sad', since I'm sad) or contrived (which would be 'happy', since I'm trying to hide my emotions).
And you're either in her shoes or you're not. You can't 'pretty much' be in someone else's shoes. Either you are or you're not.
And you're not. Just because I have a keyboard in front of me and she has a keyboard in front of her doesn't mean I'm experiencing her experience. You might have a situation very similar, but one distinct difference is the effect your experiences have on you.
"Differences challenge assumptions."
"To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others."
Just trying to help, my dude. There are plenty of critical a-holes in the world; it would be nice if more people were applying for the 'Mr. Understanding' positions of the world.
oh my goodness, that's terrible to hear...you can spend Christmas with my fam.Originally Posted by 23ska909red02
rsdplaya:
SoleWoman:
usually im by myself so sleep and cry the day away.
Club29:
23ska909red02:
First, I see you assuming she's looking for sympathy. She certainly never said she was seeking it. Has it ever crossed your mind that some people have sad answers... because they're sad? That's not necessarily a cry for attention. Even though it can be a cry for attention, that doesn't mean that it is. If I'm sad and I want to answer, my answer is either going to be true (which would be 'sad', since I'm sad) or contrived (which would be 'happy', since I'm trying to hide my emotions).
And you're either in her shoes or you're not. You can't 'pretty much' be in someone else's shoes. Either you are or you're not.
And you're not. Just because I have a keyboard in front of me and she has a keyboard in front of her doesn't mean I'm experiencing her experience. You might have a situation very similar, but one distinct difference is the effect your experiences have on you.
"Differences challenge assumptions."
"To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others."
Just trying to help, my dude. There are plenty of critical a-holes in the world; it would be nice if more people were applying for the 'Mr. Understanding' positions of the world.
hmm, how quick YOU are to judge. interesting.
You dont know me, i dont put my life on here like some folks do. You know nothing about me.
Stop acting like you do.
I know you're a male and she's a female. And I know that you're expressing a 'Life sucks, but I'm not going to whine about itattitude', and she's not. I wasn't saying I know you. I was saying that you're not going through what she's going through.
Those are two things I know about you just from this thread, and even knowing one thing about is enough to know whether or not you're going through herexperience.
And you're not going through what she's going through. A difference in gender experience and a difference in attitude... is still a difference.
I really don't know know why you've taken a defensive tone, though.
"I'm not being defensive. Quit judging me."
Right?
I'm not saying you're defensive or you're being defensive. I'm saying the tone of your replies is defensive, and I can see the replies righthere on the screen.
Club29:
and, no one ever SAYS they're looking for sympathy. I mean how backwards would that be?
"Hey, im looking for sympathy with my next comment, so give it to me please!"
People who feel sorry for themselves and look for pity from others need to realize that they have the power to turn themselves around in some form.
Since you wanna throw out a bunch of quotes, i will too.
'Where there is a will, there is a way'
'Positive vibes make positive lives.'
'YOU are your biggest motivation for change.'
Sulking does nothing but put one in a deeper hole than they were in to begin with.
Excellent quotes, and you're right; people in dire straits do need to realize that they are the most effective vehicle to arriving at theirown change. I've been through a lot in my life and I feel like I've pulled myself out of it.
But my greatest accomplishment is my desire to empathize and help others out of their own darkness. So what? I've been through tough times and didn'tlet myself stay down. Woopie.