Hard times.....How do you cope?

[OGponson]

What have you dealt with in life and how did you get through it?

I also have another qustion kinda related but don’t want to make a new thread. Do you believe in spiritual warfare and spiritual punishment?

My situation. 3 years ago I relapsed on my drug of choice and lost EVERYTHING and also dealt with some serious legal issues. A couple of years prior to that I became involved with a married woman and their marriage ended. I’m apart of that by default because I was the other dude but in my defense (if I even have on) the husband was a porn addict and had been caught videoing women in the grocery store and the woman told me the marriage was basically technical because they owned a house but had been dead because of the porn, videos, and he was caught contacting an ex the night before his wife went into labor.

Bam ff, I relapsed on drugs and lost everything I had even my freedom to an extent. 2 yrs later I lost everything in a flood and spent 9 months living in hotels my car sometimes and wherever else. Got past that. Then bam I get sick and almost die. I had to have an emergency procedure and was left with a physical problem that is able to be reversed. I don’t have insurance and now can’t have my procedure reversed. I can’t work and have been hustling. My house got broken into now I’m in debt and am stuck with a serious medical situation (colostomy bag).
My question is. Am I trippin or am I goin through something bigger than me. What do I do? Just like to hear varying opinions and keep an open mind. I’m at the end of my rope. Not making suicide. Threats but am definitely at a point where I’m about to say **** it and self destruct

 

[DCAllAfrican]

 

[Extrait de Minimalisme]

Right now:
Mom’s dying/dementia
Dad is in jail and headed to prison
Ungrateful BM’s threatening w/ the mental/physical abuse if I dip in her and our two kids (I want joint cust)
Middle sister is going through it as a single mother
Older sister is going through it as a single mother
Student loans, credit card bills out the asss
The shh has hit the fan at both of my decent paying jobs
Realizing I’ve suffered from depression since I was 14 and sometimes acute anxiety attacks
....
With all that being said, this isn’t even the roughest patch I’ve gone through. All I ask/pray for is health, and I can wake up everyday and take care of the rest. I’m in full control of my life, and my kids and that’s all I can really worry about at the end of the day. I’ve been struck with “bad luck” early in my 20’s, like legit poverty issues. Once I held myself accountable and realized I was the only person In control, the bad luck ended.

OP, I would recommend you part with everything of value, all you need is a decent roof over your head. Put pride and ego aside and look into donations or community services to help you get the procedure you need. If you aren’t able to work, file for disability, or some form of aid. Ask for help, is what I’m getting at, family, friends, strangers, and hold yourself accountable.

 

[Nereyda Vuelve Por Dios]

Sadden to hear that op and Extrait de Minimalisme

I would say keep fighting. Keep hustling. You got no choice but up homie. You said you aint making threats of suicide but self destruction is an attempt to end it all.

I have family to confide. Great friends albeit small group. I have fitness, boxing. My kids are my motivation. Its tough fam. And i cant fathom your pain. But it will get better. Focus on the good ****. Build on that. I sound like a cliche AA counselor but its how i see ****.

 

[Ox.]

Each day is a new day to work on what you can change. For the stuff you can't, worrying about them is only going to derail you from your progress. At the end of the day, you only have yourself.

 

[kingkoopa]

What have you dealt with in life and how did you get through it?

I also have another qustion kinda related but don’t want to make a new thread. Do you believe in spiritual warfare and spiritual punishment?

My situation. 3 years ago I relapsed on my drug of choice and lost EVERYTHING and also dealt with some serious legal issues. A couple of years prior to that I became involved with a married woman and their marriage ended. I’m apart of that by default because I was the other dude but in my defense (if I even have on) the husband was a porn addict and had been caught videoing women in the grocery store and the woman told me the marriage was basically technical because they owned a house but had been dead because of the porn, videos, and he was caught contacting an ex the night before his wife went into labor.

Bam ff, I relapsed on drugs and lost everything I had even my freedom to an extent. 2 yrs later I lost everything in a flood and spent 9 months living in hotels my car sometimes and wherever else. Got past that. Then bam I get sick and almost die. I had to have an emergency procedure and was left with a physical problem that is able to be reversed. I don’t have insurance and now can’t have my procedure reversed. I can’t work and have been hustling. My house got broken into now I’m in debt and am stuck with a serious medical situation (colostomy bag).
My question is. Am I trippin or am I goin through something bigger than me. What do I do? Just like to hear varying opinions and keep an open mind. I’m at the end of my rope. Not making suicide. Threats but am definitely at a point where I’m about to say **** it and self destruct

You HAVE to find something to do.

Chase your wildest dream or get s job and build.

I went through a time of alcoholism but found the light.

You are currently alive.

LIVE!

Do whatever makes you happy.

Sounds simple but at the same time impossible.

 

[JetsfanQ]

I got through rough times focusing on 1-things that will bring me more money 2- hobbies that will make me happy

 

[waitwut]

going thru some terrible times right now 2019 showed no love to me. i still got my health tho im good my fams good. stay busy and try to be productive.

 

[ahat]

Keep your heads up

Went through a terrible time 2015-2017. I know how it feels.

Like homie posted above, try not to stress over things that are out of your control. Cliche I know and easier said than done. Just be thankful every morning you wake up and that you are healthy.

As others said pick up a hobby that is healthy and productive. Set some goals and make a plan to achieve those goals. Even smaller goals within that plan, like milestones I guess. Once you hit them you'll feel 100x better that you accomplished something you set out to do and it'll continue to motivate you.

Best of luck to everyone struggling, wish you nothing but success and happiness.

The anthem!

 

[SC kid]

I believe in you op.

You can overcome this

 

[6 Rings G.O.A.T.]

 

[robpzee612]

 

[6 Rings G.O.A.T.]

 

[htg designs]

when you going through hell, dont stop. keep going, til you past it. long as you have breath you have hope for something better

 

[Zainjal26]

I’ve posted a thread about some bs that happened to me earlier this year

I’ve been honestly doing anything to occupy myself to keep myself busy

Been working harder, hitting the gym, getting nice haircuts, going to the movies even if it’s sometimes by myself ( anything to keep myself occupied and away from thinking about a certain person)

Grandma passed a few weeks ago, me and my moms been getting threats from our landlord who’s a racist prick with eviction notices so we’ve been fighting that , my sister wants to get married but we out of money , dad is in bad health
I have the weight of the family on my shoulders because for the past 10 years my dads been too injured to work, so it’s my responsibility to get my mom and dad their own house not to worry about a hole landlords and eviction notices, get my sister married so she’s happy , my dad gets a good doctor for his treatments ( bad diabetes and spinal problems)

To be honest dog, whenever this **** gets me down which is all the time I still thank god for good health, and having a life that many people around the world in worse third world countries don’t have. Some kids In this world don’t have homes, no food, no clean water.. so I’m gonna be the b itch to complain about my tiny problems?

Nah

I listen to Eminem , kid cudi, and that rocky speech where he told his son to never let life knock you down, and when it does knock you down how fast you can get hit and get back up and keep fighting


If anyone here is going through issues, my dms are always open, suicide is never the answer, I thought it was many times but it isn’t

God bless anyone going through problems too. Y’all ain’t alone, and y’all definitely DEFINITELY AINT GONNA LET LIFE KNOCK YOU DOWN!

Some tracks I recommend for anyone angry at life :











I pray anyone going through problems gets through theirs. It’s tough as hell, toughest thing life throws at you, but you can get through it!



God bless

 

[wayniac211]

There’s always someone out there that has it worse.
Stay off them drugs op. Seek social services in your local county for programs to help get you stabilized. You got it in you, you just don’t know it yet

 

[OGponson]

Appreciate any kind words or encouragement. I’ve been off the drugs for 3 years and when I relapsed I had been free of it for like 12 yrs. When I used again it was for like three months but for like 2 I was psychotic. Yeah I’ve definitely learned my lesson. I kinda know I have because I smoke a lot of green but lately it hasn’t been relaxing me like I like. Instead of thinking “I need something to go with this” I get more frustrated because I know hard drugs aren’t an option. I literally don’t want them and feel like how you feel about food that gave you food poisoning.
But yeah my struggle is real, but damn, hearing some of y’all problems I feel bad about lettin mine get to me. I feel for yall real talk. BROTHERS OF THE STRUGGLE.

 

[OGponson]

Does anyone have any insight of the spiritual aspect of this. The drug relapse is my responsibility and something I had control over. But since then it’s been stuff like natural disasters and health back to back to back. Sometimes I feel like I’m old enough to know something is communicating with me through life and there’s a lesson in this. I can’t figure it out tho and I’m scared.
On a positive note the fear I have about what I’m supposed to learn is a fear of God which I’m happy about. I used to not care about things or what happened to me. Now I think deeper and am scared to be living so wreckless mentally or physically that God has to correct me

 

[getback]

Sorry to hear about all the NT brethren going through it. We all have our battles. Better days are ahead if you keep fighting and and find a reason every day to smile. Set small goals and work towards them. Nothing happens overnight. Look into therapy if you need an outlet. It helps a lot of people just to be able to express themselves verbally. Don't sit around and harp on your situation. It's good to be self aware, but don't let the negativity control you. That's a recipe for a downward spiral. Eat healthy, drink water, get outside, get your body moving, listen to music, read, limit your social media consumption. Just keep going.

 

[jaypesoz]

Each day is a new day to work on what you can change. For the stuff you can't, worrying about them is only going to derail you from your progress. At the end of the day, you only have yourself.

That's my outlook on everything and anytime someone needs advice, I just hear them out and I try to remind them this. At the end of the day, life is neutral and all you can control is what and how you do things.

 

[lynchpin33]

Endure -- Alfred said it best.

You got this, one day at a time.

 

[Top Boy]

Pessimism to be brutally honest. Grew up in an emotionally isolated environment and adapted emotional detachment because of it. It has both its pros and cons.

I understand the world doesnt care about me, my life, or my upbringing--the world only cares about what I (you) can give it.

So no matter how depressed/tired/sad/angry I am/was I understand I have to keep moving forward because no one can or will do it for me. Be it making sure I turned all of my assignments in during college, or staying up late to finish my portions of a project to meet my deadlines at work...

I can't let myself be paralyzed by emotions.

 

[getback]

Pessimism to be brutally honest. Grew up in an emotionally isolated environment and adapted emotional detachment because of it. It has both its pros and cons.

I understand the world doesnt care about me, my life, or my upbringing--the world only cares about what I (you) can give it.

So no matter how depressed/tired/sad/angry I am/was I understand I have to keep moving forward because no one can or will do it for me. Be it making sure I turned all of my assignments in during college, or staying up late to finish my portions of a project to meet my deadlines at work...

I can't let myself be paralyzed by emotions.

Heard this was a good read

Amazon product ASIN 0865479410

 

[OGponson]

Pessimism to be brutally honest. Grew up in an emotionally isolated environment and adapted emotional detachment because of it. It has both its pros and cons.

I understand the world doesnt care about me, my life, or my upbringing--the world only cares about what I (you) can give it.

So no matter how depressed/tired/sad/angry I am/was I understand I have to keep moving forward because no one can or will do it for me. Be it making sure I turned all of my assignments in during college, or staying up late to finish my portions of a project to meet my deadlines at work...

I can't let myself be paralyzed by emotions.

I just started reading the laws of human nature and the is the first chapter

 

[Deleted member 42060]

Tough times. My sis passed away June 2019. From stage 3 cancer since 2015, and that **** spread to her reproductive system. Onco was saying if she didnt want blockage from the tumor, they would equip her with a colostomy bag for life. She said nope. She fought with the disease through all the ****ing pain and it took her life after chemo, surgery, radiation, clinical trials. I dont know anyone more mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually more tougher than my sister. 36 years old.

She was about to graduate from medical assistant school and hopefully become a P.A. 1 day. I wanted her to marry and have kids. Cant fight time.

I cant tell all the struggles and **** my family been through since we living in New York since 85. Only things I try to think about after 32 years are:

Positivity. Humor. Love. Imagination. Prayer. Music. Money. Besides money, most of these are free.

Positivity is tough and so is winning. Everyday. It gets tougher especially as you get older and when your situation sucks. Negativity is easy, and so is losing. You just try doing your best as positive as possible.

Find or make good consistent balance with something you try to do. Positivity is key. I strive for it. Barber told me yesterday, aint nothing you can do till the time takes you. Its what it is. Hope you get that loot and fix your issues man. Blessup.