Quick lil gems on dealing with women.

[dropten]

This is less about being "a man" than it is learning to be accountable and responsible.

I could care less how you dress or how many pics you have on instagram. Anyone who DOES care really makes me suspicious.

How can you seriously be concerned about how other men live their lives? Do you gain something out of forcing others to fall into line?

Everyone seems to apparently value the freedom to do what you want, but on the flip-side, but then these "guys" then want everyone to live up to the same standards of what a "man" is.

If you teach people that its more important to be honest with yourself and confident in asserting yourself then you'll address most of these concerns in the first place.

No one i've ever met who apparently fulfilled these qualities ever thought of themselves better than anyone else, they simply lived their lives without regard for how others would feel about it. 

Do you all want more lumberjacks or are you so insecure that having OTHER dudes post pics of themselves makes you feel less of who you are as a person?





Retitle this thread from "how to deal with women" to "how one person thinks men should act"

There is very little in this thread pertaining to understanding women than it is trying to get men to change their behavior. 

Im concerned not so much about how a man dresses, but the image he portrays as a man. Would you as a hetetosexual man be more attracted
to a woman who dresses in lumberjack clothing, shaved head or a woman in a slim fitting dress?
The issue is that men are dressing too close to the gender line when it comes to whats femenin. And also doing "femenin" things like having multiple online images of themselves more so then most women. OP's post can easily be accomplished by most men, ONLY IF the man makes his woman feel secure. And you CANNOT make a woman feel secure when you have more images of yourself than she does or even close to as many images as she does. Woman are naturally supposed to shine more than men. Thats why they dress more elaborately then men. The attention must almost always be on her, and thats what makes her feel secure.

Women are very susceptible to the views and opinions of what the media and the majority deems as "in" or popular. And if the most popular image of a man is skinny jeans and eye liner, weak and frail, she will more than likely approve. But deep down her natural wanting is a man opposite of her. And when thats not met she feels she must take that roll. This is also seen in the animal kingdom. When there is no supreior male in a lions pride the female will often take the lead to protect the pride. This is also seen is single mother families. The woman will often take the roll of the male and female. But that often leads to issues with the family later in life. But few strong women are able to play both rolls accordingly.

I see OPs post speaking more of balance. Nature is self balanced. Gender rolls are natural. And it works. But it starts to fall apart when men start actin like little biyaches

 

[Pedro Navaja]

the real life in this thread is real

 

[falcon4567]

Gender roles aren't natural they come from culture. They're defined by time and place and change constantly. Romeo spent the first act of the play despondently pining after Rosalind and immediately falls in love with Juliet upon seeing her and goes to extreme lengths to get with her ultimately ending in both of their deaths. And that was considered manly at the time. There was a time where a certain degree of foppishness that used to accepted that later stopped being accepted. Maybe we're cycling around back to it who knows but there is no such thing as "natural" masculine or feminine.

And in most animals the males are supposed to be more resplendent in their plumage and coloring because they have to do the most work in attracting mates. Its why Peacocks look like this:

and Peahens look like this:

What women do to get dressed up and put on display says more our cultural expectations of them than anything

 

[truthgetsbusy]

Gender roles aren't natural they come from culture. They're defined by time and place and change constantly. Romeo spent the first act of the play despondently pining after Rosalind and immediately falls in love with Juliet upon seeing her and goes to extreme lengths to get with her ultimately ending in both of their deaths. And that was considered manly at the time. There was a time where a certain degree of foppishness that used to accepted that later stopped being accepted. Maybe we're cycling around back to it who knows but there is no such thing as "natural" masculine or feminine.
And in most animals the males are supposed to be more resplendent in their plumage and coloring because they have to do the most work in attracting mates. Its why Peacocks look like this:

and Peahens look like this:

What women do to get dressed up and put on display says more our cultural expectations of them than anything

Stop it doggie. It is nature. Thats why the male Peacock looks like that and acts like that...its his "nature" he can't control it. You don't see no female peacocks pasting on feathers do you? 1. because they physically can't be 2. because its not "natural" root word being "nature".

Don't come in here with that. Men and women are different. Physically, genetically, emotionally and the adds up to how people carry themselves.

 

[falcon4567]

Yea we're different and culture impacts on us differently and creates different expectations of us. Just because certain things don't change or haven't changed in a long time doesn't make them universal or even natural. If that was the case there'd be no matrilineal or matriarchal societies, there'd be no Goddess religions or bride price. Hell if all people and cultures were natural and universal throughout time and space then sociology and anthropology wouldn't exist at all.

 

[dropten]

Gender roles aren't natural they come from culture. They're defined by time and place and change constantly. Romeo spent the first act of the play despondently pining after Rosalind and immediately falls in love with Juliet upon seeing her and goes to extreme lengths to get with her ultimately ending in both of their deaths. And that was considered manly at the time. There was a time where a certain degree of foppishness that used to accepted that later stopped being accepted. Maybe we're cycling around back to it who knows but there is no such thing as "natural" masculine or feminine.
And in most animals the males are supposed to be more resplendent in their plumage and coloring because they have to do the most work in attracting mates. Its why Peacocks look like this:

and Peahens look like this:

What women do to get dressed up and put on display says more our cultural expectations of them than anything

Peacocks you say? Hmmmm seems ive already replied to ur post over a year ago. Back to the future?

Yes I agree that gender roles have become inpart defined by culture. But how can you say gender roles are not natural and post
About peacocks and peahens in their natural roles? You just contradicted yourself.

When it comes to the animal kingdom and humans, the female human is the most attractive. Women are so attractive heterosexual women find women attractive.

They are the ones seeking mates. You see how males in other species fight each other, flash their feathers to show whos the best choice?
Women do the same damn thing. They dress not only to attract men, but to outshine other women, just like the peacock male tries to outshine other males.
They are NATURALLY LIKE THIS. Gender rolls are natural. Thats why I tell men dont chase after women. Let them chase you.
Somewhere down the line simps tried to.change that up. Romeo was a beta male. If a man was to kill himself over a girl today, he would be the biggest simp. No man would feel sympathy for him. An alpha would just move on to the next one. Juliet dont want him, then susette will simple as that.

 

[josebronx]

once you get your heart broken, you learn to not trust these ******, i rarely even look at chicks all google eyed anymore, it takes alot for me to even notice a chick(no homo) just picky as hell, especially after my last girl, a man will neverreally find a chick until he values his mind and body before some breezy, now if you are lucky to find a chick that cooks, cleans, sows, have good random conversations, actually takes care of you and your thoughts, don't **** over her, wife that **** up, until then **** em and duck em, what i have been doing for the last couple of years, trying to find a woman of substance is hard but hopefully one day,lol

yep, especially one that cleans up right. Dont gotta be a dime but they have to take care of themselves...

 

[snowinsahara]

once you get your heart broken, you learn to not trust these ******, i rarely even look at chicks all google eyed anymore, it takes alot for me to even notice a chick(no homo) just picky as hell, especially after my last girl, a man will neverreally find a chick until he values his mind and body before some breezy, now if you are lucky to find a chick that cooks, cleans, sows, have good random conversations, actually takes care of you and your thoughts, don't **** over her, wife that **** up, until then **** em and duck em, what i have been doing for the last couple of years, trying to find a woman of substance is hard but hopefully one day,lol

respect

 

[gllahone84]

once you get your heart broken, you learn to not trust these ******, i rarely even look at chicks all google eyed anymore, it takes alot for me to even notice a chick(no homo) just picky as hell, especially after my last girl, a man will neverreally find a chick until he values his mind and body before some breezy, now if you are lucky to find a chick that cooks, cleans, sows, have good random conversations, actually takes care of you and your thoughts, don't **** over her, wife that **** up, until then **** em and duck em, what i have been doing for the last couple of years, trying to find a woman of substance is hard but hopefully one day,lol

 

[youngdoc]

Too much real life for me

Exactly. Nobody is telling you what clothes to wear or what music to listen to. That's not "being yourself" but it comes a time when you have to mold yourself to become a desired and respected man. If you have to make changes then do it. "Being yourself" has dudes wearing Bowling shirts with Goku on it. "being yourself" has dudes only speaking to females behind a computer screen. "being yourself" has you dudes scared to take a drink, dance at a club, or go somewhere dolo. "Being yourself" has some dudes scared to check a female when she's being disrespectful, over dramatic, or lazy.

preach

 

[patb23]

Agree with most points. But these teneants and actions are either innately a part of your personality repertoire, or it isnt. Very difficult to change the crux of who you are as a person.

 

[lil black jean jacket]

TLR

 

[teamjordan79]

I don't buy that whole " Be yourself BS"
Because i see dudes who "be their self" and go year after year without getting buns or a girl. The way i look at it is if you want some thing you have to be willing to make the changes that are needed to get it. Am not saying change yourself completely but am saying change for the better to get the results you want.

Too much real life for me

THIS.

How can you be "yourself" in an emasculated society where BS is ubiquitous. Being yourself is another way of saying be complacent with your failures. Never stop working to advance, strive to improve and hone your skills in life. **** here with that feel-good be yourself bs.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

6) Be decisive and always have an answer for something that comes up

This one stood out to me. I know I fall victim when I am asked silly questions. Something I can work on. But in terms of always having an answer, my boys says that whenever he wines and dines his ladies, he orders their food for them and they always seem to like it. She of course tells what she wants through conversation but when the waiter comes, he order the food for them both.

 

[goldenchild9]

That list is on point.

You have to find a woman that is willing to be molded by your male logic and you have to be willing to be upgraded by her female intuition.

Its a give and a take but all of those rules are still 100% correct. Even in marriage.

When you get married you tone it down because you should be more confident in the woman's decision making and moral character by then but don't ake that as a green light to start slipping and stop being a man...you will be emasculated before you know it. You'll be stuck in a miserable relationship where your wife wears the pants. She'll clown you, purposely hurt your feelings (trying to test or chip away at your manhood) and she will cheat with another man who projects more virility and masculinity.

People keep saying to be yourself, which of course is true but if you have character flaws, you shouldn't be accepting of that...you should be constantly trying to improve.

Being flip-floppy, indecisive and over emotional will limit your success in many areas of life, not just romantic relationships.

 

[3stheluckynumbe]

Just to add...
Youll always lose money chasing women, but youll rarely lose women chasing money

 

[me no pass]

I don't buy that whole " Be yourself BS"
Because i see dudes who "be their self" and go year after year without getting buns or a girl. The way i look at it is if you want some thing you have to be willing to make the changes that are needed to get it. Am not saying change yourself completely but am saying change for the better to get the results you want.

Too much real life for me

THIS.

How can you be "yourself" in an emasculated society where BS is ubiquitous. Being yourself is another way of saying be complacent with your failures. Never stop working to advance, strive to improve and hone your skills in life. **** here with that feel-good be yourself bs.

i see NT is learning.

if you're _______  and not satisfied/happy why wouldn't you want to advance, improve, hone specific skills so you're ______?

if you're fat and not satisfied/happy why wouldn't you want to advance, improve, hone specific skills so you're fit ?

if you're failing and not satisfied/happy why wouldn't you want to advance, improve, hone specific skills so you're passing?

if you're bad with women and not satisfied/happy why wouldn't you want to advance, improve, hone specific skills so you're good with women?

self improvement is an ongoing journey and unfortunately a journey many aren't willing to take due to fear of failure, laziness, etc.

instead of "be yourself" i like to use " don't comprise your values"

 

[b smooth 202]

^ all those statements you just made are very relative though....a lot of men are misguided and put value in things that only entrap them and make them prisoners to these material things...it comes down to what should truly be valued?

the media does a good job at portraying false masculinity that perpetuates an endless cycle of irresponsible behavior and resulting destruction in our society.

When you get married you tone it down because you should be more confident in the woman's decision making and moral character by then but don't ake that as a green light to start slipping and stop being a man...you will be emasculated before you know it. You'll be stuck in a miserable relationship where your wife wears the pants. She'll clown you, purposely hurt your feelings (trying to test or chip away at your manhood) and she will cheat with another man who projects more virility and masculinity.

'when you get married' or more like when you get into the sexual partnership...as soon as your a couple the woman has the upper hand in the relationship...the man starts living FOR her and that ********

I had this happen to me with a chick I was genuinely interested in...I didn't spill my heart out to this chick or anything but she knew I wanted her..after hanging out casually a few times she decided to bring her ex around one night....I haven't spoken to the ***** since.. ...her loss

 

[oidreez]

I don't buy that whole " Be yourself BS"

Because i see dudes who "be their self" and go year after year without getting buns or a girl. The way i look at it is if you want some thing you have to be willing to make the changes that are needed to get it. Am not saying change yourself completely but am saying change for the better to get the results you want.

This is the truth right here

 

[truthgetsbusy]

^ all those statements you just made are very relative though....a lot of men are misguided and put value in things that only entrap them and make them prisoners to these material things...it comes down to what should truly be valued?
the media does a good job at portraying false masculinity that perpetuates an endless cycle of irresponsible behavior and resulting destruction in our society.
'when you get married' or more like when you get into the sexual partnership...as soon as your a couple the woman has the upper hand in the relationship...the man starts living FOR her and that ********
I had this happen to me with a chick I was genuinely interested in...I didn't spill my heart out to this chick or anything but she knew I wanted her..after hanging out casually a few times she decided to bring her ex around one night....I haven't spoken to the ***** since.. ...her loss

You are all mixed up my dude. ALL MIXED UP.

 

[b smooth 202]

You are all mixed up my dude. ALL MIXED UP.

I know I'm a rookie...the thing is I'm good completely dolo though. **** all these ****.

 

[BigDanes89]

Just to add...
Youll always lose money chasing women, but youll rarely lose women chasing money

I like this.

 

[jsflip]

once you get your heart broken, you learn to not trust these ******, i rarely even look at chicks all google eyed anymore, it takes alot for me to even notice a chick(no homo) just picky as hell, especially after my last girl, a man will neverreally find a chick until he values his mind and body before some breezy, now if you are lucky to find a chick that cooks, cleans, sows, have good random conversations, actually takes care of you and your thoughts, don't **** over her, wife that **** up, until then **** em and duck em, what i have been doing for the last couple of years, trying to find a woman of substance is hard but hopefully one day,lol

Amen.  My buddy and I dated our GFs for 4+ years (no cheating, no abuse).  Mine broke up with me last year to "find herself."  She became a total ****.  My buddy's girl broke up with him this year to "be independent."  Turns out she was messing with a dude behind the scenes and are now "dating."  Funny part: these girls are best friends.  Oh, and my bud's ex is getting my ex's sloppy seconds.

Think we look at girls the same way?  Hell no 

  Don't chase after any girl fellas.  If you work hard, keep improving yourself, and set goals, the good ones will chase after you along the way.

 

[goldenchild9]

Amen.  My buddy and I dated our GFs for 4+ years (no cheating, no abuse).  Mine broke up with me last year to "find herself."  [COLOR=#red]She became a total ****.[/COLOR]  My buddy's girl broke up with him this year to "be independent."  Turns out she was messing with a dude behind the scenes and are now "dating."  Funny part: these girls are best friends.  Oh, and my bud's ex is getting my ex's sloppy seconds.

Think we look at girls the same way?  Hell no    Don't chase after any girl fellas.  If you work hard, keep improving yourself, and set goals, the good ones will chase after you along the way.

Don't mean to laugh at your pain but the way you put that....

 

[アミーゴ]

Simply put, be a cocky funny jerk, no so cocky your annoying and arrogant so balance it with some funny so chicks always wonder if your serious

Had a girl breakup with me because, "she couldn't tell when I was serious or joking."