Say this to a girl at a party tonight for GUARANTEED SEX*

[million dollar stacks]

Originally Posted by kidUFC

This actually worked for me .. 3 for 3 so far..

Hanging out with a girl in the backseat.. I pulled out a quarter and said " if i flipped this coin, what are my chances of getting head? "
* proceeds with whipping it out*

Another time was at a party.. hanging out with this chick and I said " if i flipped this quarter, what are my chances of getting head?"
Next thong you know.. I'm in the bathroom holding her hair up..

Another back seat story.. after saying the line, she looks at me and smile.. I grab her race towards my manhood... It was a great night.

I don't believe any of this for some reason

 

[Fresh Like Will]

Originally Posted by Mycoldyourdone

thank you BasedLongstroke

Good look on the tip. You just have to be fluid. Dont be hardheaded thinking of rejection, be shaft and direct. Go in and out of these situations, repeatedly, cause its just a numbers game. Everyone hates being ballsdeep in a drought. Most of the time you'll never see these opportunities coming. Have a stiff gameplan and get your Little Richard swag on. Your confidence should only go erect.

 

[Jim Shady]

Originally Posted by VeintiSiete



*Actual sex not guaranteed.

60% of the time it works every time

 

[buggz05]

Originally Posted by kidUFC

This actually worked for me .. 3 for 3 so far..

Hanging out with a girl in the backseat.. I pulled out a quarter and said " if i flipped this coin, what are my chances of getting head? "
* proceeds with whipping it out*

Another time was at a party.. hanging out with this chick and I said " if i flipped this quarter, what are my chances of getting head?"
Next thong you know.. I'm in the bathroom holding her hair up..

Another back seat story.. after saying the line, she looks at me and smile.. I grab her race towards my manhood... It was a great night.

Thanks I'm going to use this for the next 3 decades. Awesome.

 

[buggz05]

Originally Posted by Ballinsam23

not big on pick up lines, but i'm definitely gonna try this one.

that "can i borrow you, i'll promise i'll give you back" line actually worked for me at club/bar once. I was scoping the dance floor tryna see who i'm about to have dry sex with. I see this 

girl who was dancing with her friend. So I gently pulled her towards me....

Me:

Her: I'm dancing with my friend
Me to her friend: can i borrow your friend, i'll promise i'll give her back
Her friend:

. Proceeds to push her towards me.

We ended up hooking up that night. 1/1 with that line thanks to NT

You're welome, b. /Realtalk

 

[amdoctor]

Originally Posted by Mark Antony

Originally Posted by Mr Marcus

Just got fired for sectual harassment

on a porn set my dude?

  

 

[jhova718]

#YOLT

 

[jewseejay]

Originally Posted by ricky409

SpeakUp23 wrote:

Originally Posted by scshift

Negative on my part.

Me: So what do you like to do?
Her: Usual stuff, sports, art, hanging out. Blah blah.
Me: Cool... some dude is going to hit the jackpot some day.
Her: Aww thank you!
Me: But I'm going to hit you tonight.

(stupid slip up

)
Her: What? Don't hit me

Me: %*+!

hardest ive laughed on here since like 05... srs

thx to everyone involved

dat humility to telll that story

that gif execution

that thought of her reaction.... bahahbabahbahabha

 

[deepinthajeep]

Originally Posted by AKA LONGSTROKE

The only way to guarantee that you are getting laid, is to not expect to get laid. 
Women are easy to understand. Make them feel comfortable, and they will do almost anything. As soon as they feel pressure, they tighten up, then lose their sexual desires. As soon as you meet a woman, she already knows if she is going to give you a piece, so it is up to you to mess that up. 

Don't expect any, don't try and be too funny, nor manly, being macho, be at ease, treat her as if there is no safer place in the world than being with you. No judgement, apply no pressure, let her feel in control of herself, and you'll get some, first date.

In other words, act as if you've already got it. Don't act like you own it, act as if you've been there before.

BTW, this works on ALL women, of ALL races.

You're welcome. 

Truth. This man speaks it.


This thread is hilarious btw.


"moisture, rigamortis, penetration, breakfast"

 

[Renaldo Balkman]

woke up sunday morning expecting more tales of fails.... cmon NT... I know some of you tried this last night

 

[raptors29]

Originally Posted by onewearz

Originally Posted by rayray3thousand

video proof of people trying this would have thread of the year potential...

cmon NT... keep us married men entertained

exactly , i live through u young dudes, succeed for the old married dudes

can't wait to hear how many of u eff this up

Hell naw I'm not using this! I don't need lines yet. Maybe when I'm old

 

[10 piece nuggets]

Originally Posted by MILLION DOLLAR STACKS

Originally Posted by kidUFC

This actually worked for me .. 3 for 3 so far..

Hanging out with a girl in the backseat.. I pulled out a quarter and said " if i flipped this coin, what are my chances of getting head? "
* proceeds with whipping it out*

Another time was at a party.. hanging out with this chick and I said " if i flipped this quarter, what are my chances of getting head?"
Next thong you know.. I'm in the bathroom holding her hair up..

Another back seat story.. after saying the line, she looks at me and smile.. I grab her race towards my manhood... It was a great night.

I don't believe any of this for some reason

Its better than that story some fool made in the awkward sexual encounters thread. Talkin bout how moms caught her daughter doming up a dude and he dipped but told him to come back cause she aint done or something.

No dambs given at all.


But for real, imma use that line next time.

 

[usafant]

Originally Posted by ricky409

SpeakUp23 wrote:

Originally Posted by scshift

Negative on my part.

Me: So what do you like to do?
Her: Usual stuff, sports, art, hanging out. Blah blah.
Me: Cool... some dude is going to hit the jackpot some day.
Her: Aww thank you!
Me: But I'm going to hit you tonight.

(stupid slip up

)
Her: What? Don't hit me

Me: %*+!

A+ I haven't seen this gif in a min

 

[brocomeatme]

Originally Posted by scshift

Negative on my part.

Me: So what do you like to do?
Her: Usual stuff, sports, art, hanging out. Blah blah.
Me: Cool... some dude is going to hit the jackpot some day.
Her: Aww thank you!
Me: But I'm going to hit you tonight.

(stupid slip up

)
Her: What? Don't hit me

Me: %*+!

come on, virgin

 

[staystrong]

Originally Posted by theekinqq

Originally Posted by AKA LONGSTROKE

The only way to guarantee that you are getting laid, is to not expect to get laid. 
Women are easy to understand. Make them feel comfortable, and they will do almost anything. As soon as they feel pressure, they tighten up, then lose their sexual desires. As soon as you meet a woman, she already knows if she is going to give you a piece, so it is up to you to mess that up. 

Don't expect any, don't try and be too funny, nor manly, being macho, be at ease, treat her as if there is no safer place in the world than being with you. No judgement, apply no pressure, let her feel in control of herself, and you'll get some, first date.

In other words, act as if you've already got it. Don't act like you own it, act as if you've been there before.

BTW, this works on ALL women, of ALL races.

You're welcome. 

 

[bruce negro]

Originally Posted by Ballinsam23

not big on pick up lines, but i'm definitely gonna try this one.

that "can i borrow you, i'll promise i'll give you back" line actually worked for me at club/bar once. I was scoping the dance floor tryna see who i'm about to have dry sex with. I see this 

girl who was dancing with her friend. So I gently pulled her towards me....

Me:

Her: I'm dancing with my friend
Me to her friend: can i borrow your friend, i'll promise i'll give her back
Her friend:

. Proceeds to push her towards me.

We ended up hooking up that night. 1/1 with that line thanks to NT

 

[dajondondo]

I told a chick she had 2 choices.... either come home with me, or go home with a picture of me to masterbate to.

 

[troymcclure]

I got that don't give a %!$+ look going for me. Perfect messy hair and facial hair, smooth, not jazzed up, well fitting outfits and comfortable stance, slouch and sitting positions.
Chicks are just comfy around me.

I usually chat for a little, ask if they wanna blow this place for a minute, take a walk and spark up a J..

then just ACTUALLY try to get to know them with silly things in between like "damn, you lookin' more sexy than a chocolate covered strawberry right now".

 

[marvel man]

Originally Posted by toast1985

Worth the try

definitely

 

[scshift]

I'm going to die a virgin. I can't even get sex when I do things which give me guaranteed sex

 

[ricky409]

Originally Posted by scshift

I'm going to die a virgin. I can't even get sex when I do things which give me guaranteed sex

scshift... its aight brudda...

once you get on your feet... get established, and #bawse up, then you'll be jumpin yambs left and right...

and you like... 17, right? you're at the bottom of the totem pole, and the young tight dumb girls are at the top..

everybody wants them... nobody wants you...

as you get older, the tables turn.

every wonder why those "worlds sexiest men" are always over 30?

knowledge, fambs... i just kicked it..

 

[scshift]

Originally Posted by ricky409

Originally Posted by scshift

I'm going to die a virgin. I can't even get sex when I do things which give me guaranteed sex

scshift... its aight brudda...

once you get on your feet... get established, and #bawse up, then you'll be jumpin yambs left and right...

and you like... 17, right? you're at the bottom of the totem pole, and the young tight dumb girls are at the top..

everybody wants them... nobody wants you...

as you get older, the tables turn.

every wonder why those "worlds sexiest men" are always over 30?

knowledge, fambs... i just kicked it..

It's all good man. I want to smash someone but I'm not dying to do it. I want to make sure I really like the girl too.

I'm just getting started in this life thing... check back on me in a few years to see how I've done.

Good stuff too

 

[Mark Antony]

Originally Posted by scshift

Originally Posted by ricky409

Originally Posted by scshift

I'm going to die a virgin. I can't even get sex when I do things which give me guaranteed sex

scshift... its aight brudda...

once you get on your feet... get established, and #bawse up, then you'll be jumpin yambs left and right...

and you like... 17, right? you're at the bottom of the totem pole, and the young tight dumb girls are at the top..

everybody wants them... nobody wants you...

as you get older, the tables turn.

every wonder why those "worlds sexiest men" are always over 30?

knowledge, fambs... i just kicked it..

It's all good man. I want to smash someone but I'm not dying to do it. I want to make sure I really like the girl too.

I'm just getting started in this life thing... check back on me in a few years to see how I've done.

Good stuff too

Naw for real, get it how you get it, like her or not live your life.  I gotta dude now 27 still a virgin for no good reason.  Mind bottling.

 

[patent2305]

Originally Posted by VeintiSiete


You're chatting her up, making her demonstrate value to you by telling you her hobbies and whatnot blah blah blah


so you say

"well, a very lucky man is going to hit the jackpot some day." (referring to her, obviously)

she'll be flattered, and then you go in for the kill with:

"but im trying to hit it tonight"

DOUBLE ENTENDRE.

throw out a coquettish (but not creepy) smile and BOOM!

moisture, rigormortis, penetration, breakfast.

Now go.


*Actual sex not guaranteed.

Lmao this made me laugh. Won't be trying this at work haha. Get hit with sexual harassment.

 

[hendrix watermelon]

Originally Posted by Mark Antony

Originally Posted by scshift

Originally Posted by ricky409

scshift... its aight brudda...

once you get on your feet... get established, and #bawse up, then you'll be jumpin yambs left and right...

and you like... 17, right? you're at the bottom of the totem pole, and the young tight dumb girls are at the top..

everybody wants them... nobody wants you...

as you get older, the tables turn.

every wonder why those "worlds sexiest men" are always over 30?

knowledge, fambs... i just kicked it..

It's all good man. I want to smash someone but I'm not dying to do it. I want to make sure I really like the girl too.

I'm just getting started in this life thing... check back on me in a few years to see how I've done.

Good stuff too

Naw for real, get it how you get it, like her or not live your life.  I gotta dude now 27 still a virgin for no good reason.  Mind bottling.

god level neckbeard achieved

his right forearm must be huge yo.