TAY: thread about yambs...

[tonton32]

brothers, looking for a bit of insight on two separate instances, hopefully someone can drop some yamb knowledge bc i swear females are the hardest to understand sometimes

i'll start by saying around mid Feb. i was fortunate enough to close out a brutal 4 month drought {). i met a older female at a bar that i frequent (shes 28 im 22). its a manchester united bar in the city and i usually go there to chat it up with the regulars and enjoy some great banter over a cold one. On weekends, the bar has live entertainment and she was one of the performing acts the night i met her. Shes a singer song writer, actually really good, and after her performance 3 of the guys i was sitting next to wasted no time and instantly expressed their interest. The thirst was so real, i mean buying her drinks, "i should quit my banking job to be your agent", yadayadada. Meanwhile, i just sat there and continued talking to the barman and every now and then i would jump into the conversation and drop some one liners, each time i made sure to very obviously establish eye contact with her. After sometime the guys headed out for a smoke and i was left alone with her. We spoke for awhile and once she established that i actually didnt know the other guys we had a couple of laughs making fun of how thirsty they were. By the time the dudes came back we made it clear that we were talking and they shoved off. Though i wasnt expecting to hit, she eventually invited me over to her crib and the ruckus was brought. She ended up booty calling me at 2am the following friday, same thing the next day, and by the following weekend she had made plans to be a regular performer at the bar. For almost the entire month of march and a bit of april, we met up on either friday or sat roughly every weekend at about 130 or 2 am, had a few drinks after her performances and smashed. Having just closed out a drought this whole thing was absolutely ideal for me, had a brotha walking around thinking i was marcus graham () telling my friends how to handle older chicks and stuff lol. All of a sudden, she unprecedentedly txt me on a sunday and asks if i want to catch a movie, no problem. she then starts inviting me to her shows during the week, impossible i got work. she makes it seem like its no big deal, but after smashing on a friday i get a txt at 130am the next night, saying "hey, sorry babe im seeing someone now"...im like wtf we just smashed yesterday! the next weekend i go back to the bar to have a drink, shes there with her busted *** friends, just being real, and all night she makes awkward eye contact, at some point when shes alone i eventually walk up to her and say hey she awkwardly says hey and pretty much just dips at the end of the night without acknowledging me at all really. At this point im like **** it, im never txting her again w/e. problem is its now May and i havent been back to my favorite bar since april bc she makes it impossible for me to be there w/o making it awkward as (*$ and she now makes her bread there...wtf is up with this broad, i dont know where this came from, but as a result ive lost my go to bar! anyone ever have something similar before?

secondly, sorry for the write up i just need to vent, ive since moved on and have been getting txt from this girl who i hooked up with a bit back in high school. i never txt her she always hits me up and invites me out, every single time weve met up its been the same thing. we meet at a speak easy or bar, get drunk together, right when we start getting intimate she invites one of her friends and i get blocked this has happened on three separate occasions. this last time, after ignoring her txt for a few weeks she txt me to meet up saying that she misses me. we meet up and the cycle repeats itself, right when were dancing and getting close she invites her friend who just stands there third wheeling asking me if i have any friends, straight blocking! i eventually say **** it and dip. she txt me the next morning saying "where did you go? sorry i was really drunk lets hang again this weekend" wtf do these *****s want from a *****, somebody let me know!?

#rant #wall of txt #goodnight

 

[アミーゴ]

i hate mixed signals :x there's this, like, certain tension/chemistry between us. i don't know what it is. but we get along so well in person. whenever he doesn't text me back, however, it makes me think that he lost interest to the point where i don't know if i should give up on him. i feel like he's playing hard to get with ME sometimes.

Ask him if he wants to smash?

 

[bluexsneakerhead]

Appears he knows the game and is manipulating it to his advantage by dictating your emotions. Playing you hot and cold. Controlling the direction of the conversation.

The more he seems unavailable, the more you yearn for his attention.

THIS. but i just control myself because i don't want to seem clingy.

Ask him if he wants to smash?

this waiting game is killing me :x

 

[アミーゴ]

THIS. but i just control myself because i don't want to seem clingy.
he already knows. this waiting game is killing me :x

Nah u need to make it much more clear. On that note, when is Scotty invited to UCR!?

 

[champcruthik]

Blue: Self-control is valuable. I'd never reveal the depth of your emotions or perceived "clingy-ness". Would likely scare him off or play right into his hands.

My guess is that him knowing he "has you," that you openly want it, makes it too easy. Guys want a challenge.

I'd flip the script and make him chase to balance out the shift in power and control. Text less often, shorter responses, cut off conversations abruptly.

Make him wonder what's wrong or what's changed. Either he starts chasing or he didn't care that much to begin with.

 

[champcruthik]

tonton: I see two options. The mature route is having a clear personal conversation with her to set boundaries. This is my soccer bar for matches but I understand your work/livelihood also exists here. We're both mature enough to co-exist. Won't kill the awkwardness, but at least there's clear understanding and agreement.

The other route is invoking jealously. Bring the hottest girl you know that's a sure thing. Be sure she's touchy, feely and extremely flirty in a visible manner all night in the presence of the other female (singer). Makes a passive aggressive statement that you're fine without her, and actually the "winner" post-breakup/post-hookup. This route tends to be better if you're ready, willing, yearning to smash again because if it works, she'll run back into your arms.

 

[champcruthik]

tonton: Second scenario is simpler. Cut off the connection because she's playing games or not down/ready to smash. Or bring a male friend to wingman to preoccupy her female friend. Iso technique.

 

[Top Boy]

To my collegiate black NT'ers,

How does one go about bringing in white yambs in college?

It's like a whole different game from HS.. I was enrolled in almost all honors classes so smashing them then was easy. Smash one, they would talk, leading to another getting curious and so on and so on..

But now im at a state college thats almost 93% white and I just feel like that lone black crayon in an ocean of white. Dont say a word in class, or on the shuttle. All the people I hang with is my same crew from HS (who all go to this university too, but are fine strictly smashing the go-nowhere black JO's from HS) and the only white friend i've made is my roommate.

Attempt to take a photo of myself at 2 AM. Not a bad lookin dude. Lock eyes with chicks all the time, just don't even know how to go about approaching them in college.

 

[216301baller]

Relax bro your thinkin way too hard about it just be yourself..be social n they will come easy..they are naturally drawn to brothers in college.. in conclusion stay swaggy n let nature take its course

 

[216301baller]

Relax bro your thinkin way too hard about it just be yourself..be social n they will come easy..they are naturally drawn to brothers in college.. in conclusion stay swaggy n let nature take its course

 

[blackdynamite]

average looking black dude, so should get a couple...just tell em you on the bball team and you will be lavishing in quadruple somes 

 

[bluexsneakerhead]

Blue: Self-control is valuable. I'd never reveal the depth of your emotions or perceived "clingy-ness". Would likely scare him off or play right into his hands.

My guess is that him knowing he "has you," that you openly want it, makes it too easy. Guys want a challenge.

I'd flip the script and make him chase to balance out the shift in power and control. Text less often, shorter responses, cut off conversations abruptly.

Make him wonder what's wrong or what's changed. Either he starts chasing or he didn't care that much to begin with.

yeah i don't want to scare him off i guess i should just stop texting him all together. i mean, i'm sure he knows that i like him. i tell him straight up when i'm in the mood and whatnot but since he badly injured his leg a few weeks ago, we weren't able to spend time together. now that he's healing, the ball is in his court. it's his turn to make a move but i'm down to give him a challenge. but my feels are pretty obvious through my body language. sometimes being a girl sucks since i start smiling like crazy when i'm in his presence.

 

[216301baller]

U gotta work on ur confidence jay..swag comes from success not what you buy..just thought I put that out there

 

[tdogg2k]

Relax bro your thinkin way too hard about it just be yourself..be social n they will come easy..they are naturally drawn to brothers in college.. in conclusion stay swaggy n let nature take its course

qft. most white chicks think all black dudes are either extreme players or just hate white girls. ove been told several times by white girls I don't look like I would give a WG a time of day. until you let your personality shine and make them comfortable. (how I got my WG , now) be you throw a joke in...show your diversity and break the stereotype.



@tonton
1 of 2 things happened in 1st scenario. she was seeing u and another dude at the same time and he may of showed more interest in wifing her and giving her time.
or
same thing but maybe she chose him over you (because of more interest shown by dude. )
not saying u werwnt putting in your work. just saying u seemed like u were only interested in the booty call aspect and a chick that age. is looking for more

 

[joepac12]

Tonton. For both scenarios I would scratch both chicks and try to find some new females to talk too. Both sound flaky to me. That's not a quality you want in a female regardless if your just smashing.

 

[tr1ll]

Are the ladies still in this thread? I need some advise from a female...

 

[Mark Antony]

Seems like as soon as you decide you're off that, the more intimidated and interested they get. Strange creatures.

 

[bluexsneakerhead]

Are the ladies still in this thread? I need some advise from a female...

wassup boo?

 

[tr1ll]

Are the ladies still in this thread? I need some advise from a female...

wassup boo?

I been friends with this chick I work with for about a year now. When I first met her she had a girlfriend, but I never believed that ish for a second. I still let her buddy up with me and we became real friends. Thats my homie.

Shes always been the flirty typem but recently its been feeling like its a little bit more there. Yesterday, I went to kick it and smoke with her. We're sitting on the couch and we're silent(partly because we're baked), and shes over there just playing with her phone. This situation is feeling familiar, like high school when shes waiting on me to make a move.

I dunno if I'm trippin, is she just that comfortable around me and I'm trying to make things what I want it to be?

I hold my friends close to me and I know if I was to make a move its gonna change things. I know it sounds so lame, but I don't want to eff up our friendship because Im thinking with my small head.

 

[lamekilla]

For all my Atlanta NT'er where is the best place to find some white yambs? I've been wanting to try something new for a min. But not just yambs though either. Actually mingling and hanging out would be cool too

 

[dakingii]

For all my Atlanta NT'er where is the best place to find some white yambs? I've been wanting to try something new for a min. But not just yambs though either. Actually mingling and hanging out would be cool too

Buckhead.

Go to Buckhead Saloon or go to the adjacent bars down the street on East Andrews on a Saturday. White yambs are plentiful there.

 

[guccjermaine]

For all my Atlanta NT'er where is the best place to find some white yambs? I've been wanting to try something new for a min. But not just yambs though either. Actually mingling and hanging out would be cool too

Buckhead.

Go to Buckhead Saloon or go to the adjacent bars down the street on East Andrews on a Saturday. White yambs are plentiful there.

THIS also parks within the metro area. The best are in Athens,Ga. Broad street. They love brothers and they love drinking.

 

[T Lo Sweater]

today is her bday. i told her happy bday. she tells me she wants us to to to the city. i told her no some other time

 

[T Lo Sweater]

doublè

 

[lamekilla]

Thanks fellas! I knew Athens had em cause of UGA and what not buy its a little far from my area (riverdale) but I frequent buckhead every weekend. Def gonna be in the bars around there!