There are NO benefits for men to get married.

[DCAllAfrican]

Originally Posted by bboy1827



Honestly, if you can live with someone for a long time without wanting to kill them then you might as well get that tax break...but get a prenup. A wise man once said "You've got to hold on to your receipt"

How do you (or anyone) respond to the logic, "if you get a pre-nup, you are already throwing in the towel of defeat." Some people view getting one is a way of saying, "I know this won't work." I have even heard folks say that if you really love someone you wouldn't do that to them,

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Originally Posted by bboy1827



Honestly, if you can live with someone for a long time without wanting to kill them then you might as well get that tax break...but get a prenup. A wise man once said "You've got to hold on to your receipt"

How do you (or anyone) respond to the logic, "if you get a pre-nup, you are already throwing in the towel of defeat." Some people view getting one is a way of saying, "I know this won't work." I have even heard folks say that if you really love someone you wouldn't do that to them,

 

[green rhino123]

if it makes you, your spouse & family happier for whatever reason,
isn't that a benefit?

not like one has to explain their reasoning to every neighbor to receive
the benefit

i feel sad about some of the people in here thinking they have a grounded perspective on this
some of rationals lack any wisdom, you don't have to overtly agree with me to know it's true

 

[green rhino123]

if it makes you, your spouse & family happier for whatever reason,
isn't that a benefit?

not like one has to explain their reasoning to every neighbor to receive
the benefit

i feel sad about some of the people in here thinking they have a grounded perspective on this
some of rationals lack any wisdom, you don't have to overtly agree with me to know it's true

 

[bboy1827]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Originally Posted by bboy1827



Honestly, if you can live with someone for a long time without wanting to kill them then you might as well get that tax break...but get a prenup. A wise man once said "You've got to hold on to your receipt"

How do you (or anyone) respond to the logic, "if you get a pre-nup, you are already throwing in the towel of defeat." Some people view getting one is a way of saying, "I know this won't work." I have even heard folks say that if you really love someone you wouldn't do that to them,

I've seen people in love do some f up +%+ to each other.  I respond with the 50+% divorce rate and my moms two terrible divorces, not to mention alteast three of my friends that went to terrible terrible divorces, plus countless family members. I get the whole "if you love someone thing" but in real life, the real world people are f'd. and it's funny because I would gladly get married if a prenup is signed but will never get married without one, divorces are way to stressful and I pray that she would respect that. And besides if she really really loved me she would respect my wishes, otherwise we can get that good ole common law.

 

[bboy1827]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Originally Posted by bboy1827



Honestly, if you can live with someone for a long time without wanting to kill them then you might as well get that tax break...but get a prenup. A wise man once said "You've got to hold on to your receipt"

How do you (or anyone) respond to the logic, "if you get a pre-nup, you are already throwing in the towel of defeat." Some people view getting one is a way of saying, "I know this won't work." I have even heard folks say that if you really love someone you wouldn't do that to them,

I've seen people in love do some f up +%+ to each other.  I respond with the 50+% divorce rate and my moms two terrible divorces, not to mention alteast three of my friends that went to terrible terrible divorces, plus countless family members. I get the whole "if you love someone thing" but in real life, the real world people are f'd. and it's funny because I would gladly get married if a prenup is signed but will never get married without one, divorces are way to stressful and I pray that she would respect that. And besides if she really really loved me she would respect my wishes, otherwise we can get that good ole common law.

 

[whywesteppin]

Originally Posted by 23ska909red02

dreaface:

---

I think I've just given up on the idea having a good marriage with a good husband... it seems more like a fairy tale to be honest with you. I'll just let society 'win' I can be happy single.

 Btw "old lady" "main chick" sounds even worse. I dont see how people cant understand where I'm coming from society doesnt praise the faithful, good woman its always the girl thats taking off her clothes and vying for male attention. NT is a perfect example of this...

Do men seem to flock towards the half naked attention seekers? Yep, and the decent chick on the sidelines is like 'What the hell, man?' But you know what? That decent chick is locked in on some cocky, billy bad-a, deadbeat dad type, leaving decent dudes on the sidelines like 'Really? Have fun getting beat down and wondering how you're gonna get out, I guess.'

For every chick wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, good woman to get the praise and attention of males, there's some dude out there wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, humble man to get some shine. Tons of good women are thinking "I guess I have to start slutting it up to get a decent guy" while tons of good men are thinking "I guess I need to be a more arrogant jerk to get a decent guy."

Didn't know you rolled like that, ska. You free this weekend? I'm an arrogant jerk. 

 

[whywesteppin]

Originally Posted by 23ska909red02

dreaface:

---

I think I've just given up on the idea having a good marriage with a good husband... it seems more like a fairy tale to be honest with you. I'll just let society 'win' I can be happy single.

 Btw "old lady" "main chick" sounds even worse. I dont see how people cant understand where I'm coming from society doesnt praise the faithful, good woman its always the girl thats taking off her clothes and vying for male attention. NT is a perfect example of this...

Do men seem to flock towards the half naked attention seekers? Yep, and the decent chick on the sidelines is like 'What the hell, man?' But you know what? That decent chick is locked in on some cocky, billy bad-a, deadbeat dad type, leaving decent dudes on the sidelines like 'Really? Have fun getting beat down and wondering how you're gonna get out, I guess.'

For every chick wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, good woman to get the praise and attention of males, there's some dude out there wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, humble man to get some shine. Tons of good women are thinking "I guess I have to start slutting it up to get a decent guy" while tons of good men are thinking "I guess I need to be a more arrogant jerk to get a decent guy."

Didn't know you rolled like that, ska. You free this weekend? I'm an arrogant jerk. 

 

[whywesteppin]

Originally Posted by scshift

Also, what's wrong with marrying later on in life?

The 20s-late 30s are the prime of ones' life, why can't one wait until they're 40-50 before they settle down? It seems like most people are getting married around their late 20s-30s.

Well a woman optimally has children from ~20-35. So she needs to be thinking children/family by 35. As a guy, we can wait until we're in our 40's and marry a younger girl, but you need to find a girl who will marry someone who is beginning to age (which isn't necessarily difficult but it gets harder the older you are).

 

[whywesteppin]

Originally Posted by scshift

Also, what's wrong with marrying later on in life?

The 20s-late 30s are the prime of ones' life, why can't one wait until they're 40-50 before they settle down? It seems like most people are getting married around their late 20s-30s.

Well a woman optimally has children from ~20-35. So she needs to be thinking children/family by 35. As a guy, we can wait until we're in our 40's and marry a younger girl, but you need to find a girl who will marry someone who is beginning to age (which isn't necessarily difficult but it gets harder the older you are).

 

[-Red-]

Originally Posted by LDJ

Originally Posted by Hazeleyed Honey

Originally Posted by LDJ

Lol well i hope you never have kids cause guess what they will lie/cheat/decieve you at some point in there life? So are you saying kids dont love their parents? Ok even when they get older and conscious of what they are doing aka teens etc 20's they will do this. So are you saying they dont love you anymore and you wouldnt love your kids anymore? And if you trying to use the whole its different marriage is a sacred bond lol thats lol. Cause there is no way your gonna convience me or even yourself that a marriage bond etc is more closer then your child, someone who regardless of a ceremony/ring/pact will always be connected to you for life.

You just completely twisted what I said.

How can you compare a child lying to you about where they are going to go to some club or party to drink it up to a lie such as your husband lying to you that he is at work when he is +@$@@#+ some jump-off?

I meant when it came to lying and deception for cheating. That is completely two different things. Lying ,deception, and infedility in ROMANTIC relationships is not on the same level as you being lied to by your child because they want to do certain things.

When you are in a commited EXCLUSIVE and polygamous relationship, you have given that commitment to your significant other to only be with them. If you love them, how can you be so selfish to do something so vile to cheat on them? Utmost betrayal.

This goes for friendships too. I have love for a lot of my friends. But, if they do anything in which they might backstab me or lie and deceive me, in certain circumstances, you will be cut. That's not love to me. Loyalty is a virtue I regard very very highly. Not to be messed with.   

Oh lol ok you sounded real christianed then. This whole oh its different types of lyinf deciept cheating etc. No it isnt a lie is a lie, cheating is cheating, deception is deception. Its like whether you take 5 buck or 5 million, the amount doesnt change the fact, in of the day you stole something and are a theft.


How can you compare a child lying to you about where they are going to go to some club or party to drink it up to a lie such as your husband lying to you that he is at work when he is +@$@@#+ some jump-off?


The same way as if my mom took 100 bucks or my wife took 100 bucks from me, or a stranger took 100 bucks end of the day you stole from me and are a theft, who you are to me or closeness doesnt change whagt you did. Same way as lying is lying. Plus you mentioned the husband wife dynamic is different because of marriage, well ok your right, because with a marriage the only bond connection, you have is by some words you said and a piece of paper, whereas no matter what no paper no words can be said etc to change the fact that if you gave brth to a person that bond commitment is forever, There isnt a divorce of being a parent. so how can you even compare and say husband/wife bond closeness>parent and child. One is sematics, and based on religion in some cases, society, tradition etc.. and the other is an absolute.

YOU don't believe the !####@+$ you typed right here... you just can't

This is the guy in here dudes are giving so much homage for his posts?

 

[-Red-]

Originally Posted by LDJ

Originally Posted by Hazeleyed Honey

Originally Posted by LDJ

Lol well i hope you never have kids cause guess what they will lie/cheat/decieve you at some point in there life? So are you saying kids dont love their parents? Ok even when they get older and conscious of what they are doing aka teens etc 20's they will do this. So are you saying they dont love you anymore and you wouldnt love your kids anymore? And if you trying to use the whole its different marriage is a sacred bond lol thats lol. Cause there is no way your gonna convience me or even yourself that a marriage bond etc is more closer then your child, someone who regardless of a ceremony/ring/pact will always be connected to you for life.

You just completely twisted what I said.

How can you compare a child lying to you about where they are going to go to some club or party to drink it up to a lie such as your husband lying to you that he is at work when he is +@$@@#+ some jump-off?

I meant when it came to lying and deception for cheating. That is completely two different things. Lying ,deception, and infedility in ROMANTIC relationships is not on the same level as you being lied to by your child because they want to do certain things.

When you are in a commited EXCLUSIVE and polygamous relationship, you have given that commitment to your significant other to only be with them. If you love them, how can you be so selfish to do something so vile to cheat on them? Utmost betrayal.

This goes for friendships too. I have love for a lot of my friends. But, if they do anything in which they might backstab me or lie and deceive me, in certain circumstances, you will be cut. That's not love to me. Loyalty is a virtue I regard very very highly. Not to be messed with.   

Oh lol ok you sounded real christianed then. This whole oh its different types of lyinf deciept cheating etc. No it isnt a lie is a lie, cheating is cheating, deception is deception. Its like whether you take 5 buck or 5 million, the amount doesnt change the fact, in of the day you stole something and are a theft.


How can you compare a child lying to you about where they are going to go to some club or party to drink it up to a lie such as your husband lying to you that he is at work when he is +@$@@#+ some jump-off?


The same way as if my mom took 100 bucks or my wife took 100 bucks from me, or a stranger took 100 bucks end of the day you stole from me and are a theft, who you are to me or closeness doesnt change whagt you did. Same way as lying is lying. Plus you mentioned the husband wife dynamic is different because of marriage, well ok your right, because with a marriage the only bond connection, you have is by some words you said and a piece of paper, whereas no matter what no paper no words can be said etc to change the fact that if you gave brth to a person that bond commitment is forever, There isnt a divorce of being a parent. so how can you even compare and say husband/wife bond closeness>parent and child. One is sematics, and based on religion in some cases, society, tradition etc.. and the other is an absolute.

YOU don't believe the !####@+$ you typed right here... you just can't

This is the guy in here dudes are giving so much homage for his posts?

 

[dreaface]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Originally Posted by TruthGetsBusy

Originally Posted by dreaface

After reading the first part of this thread, I am surprised at how many men disagreed with OP. I am glad to see that there are a few men out there who do want to get married. As a woman, I have never been sold on the idea of marriage. [Let me just say, I dont think I'll be having kids either. If I wanted kids then I would of course want to be married.] I think I just have commitment issues and seeing how much our society hates the idea of marriage (esp. from a man's perspective) I just find it impossible for to people to make it last. There is just something about the word "wife" that leaves a bad taste in my mouth
  

.

 this might be the saddest statement I've ever read on NT.  Maybe you are around the wrong people if the word "wife" leaves a bad tast in your mouth.  Being somebody's "old lady" or "main chick" should leave a bad taste in your mouth.  Your whole post gives off a vibe of defeat and low self-esteem. 

If she doesn't want the title, why would it be viewed as defeat? Only if she holds value to that title, should she feel defeated? Or is it because you hold value to the title and feel that being a wife is something special. As I said to you before, every woman doesn't value marriage. So because one doesn't, she is now suffering from low-self esteem?

Thanks DC... my thoughts exactly. I will add this though my perspective on how a wife is viewed has been largely shaped by society. Maybe if women/wives were more valued in our society I wouldn't be so against it. I feel that becoming a wife is the ultimate self sacrifice for women and yet so many guys refer to marriage as a "prison" or looking for a "hall pass" if your always looking for a way out why would I sacrifice my independence.

 

[dreaface]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Originally Posted by TruthGetsBusy

Originally Posted by dreaface

After reading the first part of this thread, I am surprised at how many men disagreed with OP. I am glad to see that there are a few men out there who do want to get married. As a woman, I have never been sold on the idea of marriage. [Let me just say, I dont think I'll be having kids either. If I wanted kids then I would of course want to be married.] I think I just have commitment issues and seeing how much our society hates the idea of marriage (esp. from a man's perspective) I just find it impossible for to people to make it last. There is just something about the word "wife" that leaves a bad taste in my mouth
  

.

 this might be the saddest statement I've ever read on NT.  Maybe you are around the wrong people if the word "wife" leaves a bad tast in your mouth.  Being somebody's "old lady" or "main chick" should leave a bad taste in your mouth.  Your whole post gives off a vibe of defeat and low self-esteem. 

If she doesn't want the title, why would it be viewed as defeat? Only if she holds value to that title, should she feel defeated? Or is it because you hold value to the title and feel that being a wife is something special. As I said to you before, every woman doesn't value marriage. So because one doesn't, she is now suffering from low-self esteem?

Thanks DC... my thoughts exactly. I will add this though my perspective on how a wife is viewed has been largely shaped by society. Maybe if women/wives were more valued in our society I wouldn't be so against it. I feel that becoming a wife is the ultimate self sacrifice for women and yet so many guys refer to marriage as a "prison" or looking for a "hall pass" if your always looking for a way out why would I sacrifice my independence.

 

[dreaface]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Originally Posted by dreaface

Idk why you would say low self- esteem... defeat maybe... I think I've just given up on the idea having a good marriage with a good husband... it seems more like a fairy tale to be honest with you. I'll just let society 'win' I can be happy single.

 Btw "old lady" "main chick" sounds even worse. I dont see how people cant understand where I'm coming from society doesnt praise the faithful, good woman its always the girl thats taking off her clothes and vying for male attention. NT is a perfect example of this...

I would like to have a discussion about this in a different thread with you. This is a whole different can of worms but I can understand where you are coming from.

I would question where you are trying to meet men at. I know there are good men in the clubs and terrible men in the church, so where you meet someone is a crap shoot. But yea this would be a good discussion

Lol Well I havent been in the dating scene for a while... Ive been in a relationship for the past 5 years. 

 

[dreaface]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Originally Posted by dreaface

Idk why you would say low self- esteem... defeat maybe... I think I've just given up on the idea having a good marriage with a good husband... it seems more like a fairy tale to be honest with you. I'll just let society 'win' I can be happy single.

 Btw "old lady" "main chick" sounds even worse. I dont see how people cant understand where I'm coming from society doesnt praise the faithful, good woman its always the girl thats taking off her clothes and vying for male attention. NT is a perfect example of this...

I would like to have a discussion about this in a different thread with you. This is a whole different can of worms but I can understand where you are coming from.

I would question where you are trying to meet men at. I know there are good men in the clubs and terrible men in the church, so where you meet someone is a crap shoot. But yea this would be a good discussion

Lol Well I havent been in the dating scene for a while... Ive been in a relationship for the past 5 years. 

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Andrea, few question

1. Do you plan on having kids? Desire, etc. If you don't marry, are you willing to do it by yourself?

2. I see where you are coming from about marriage. It is hard to want to commit to something when all you see is failure when it comes to that role. Either folks aren't married or folks are divorced. The 30 year love-fest is rare. But it happens, so there is hope. But you want to do what is probable and not base your decisions on hope. I understand. But my question is, what sparked this feeling? Did a dude do you wrong? Did your parents have a nasty breakup? Just wondering what your base is.

 

[DCAllAfrican]

Andrea, few question

1. Do you plan on having kids? Desire, etc. If you don't marry, are you willing to do it by yourself?

2. I see where you are coming from about marriage. It is hard to want to commit to something when all you see is failure when it comes to that role. Either folks aren't married or folks are divorced. The 30 year love-fest is rare. But it happens, so there is hope. But you want to do what is probable and not base your decisions on hope. I understand. But my question is, what sparked this feeling? Did a dude do you wrong? Did your parents have a nasty breakup? Just wondering what your base is.

 

[dreaface]

Originally Posted by 23ska909red02

dreaface:

---

I think I've just given up on the idea having a good marriage with a good husband... it seems more like a fairy tale to be honest with you. I'll just let society 'win' I can be happy single.

 Btw "old lady" "main chick" sounds even worse. I dont see how people cant understand where I'm coming from society doesnt praise the faithful, good woman its always the girl thats taking off her clothes and vying for male attention. NT is a perfect example of this...

Do men seem to flock towards the half naked attention seekers? Yep, and the decent chick on the sidelines is like 'What the hell, man?' But you know what? That decent chick is locked in on some cocky, billy bad-a, deadbeat dad type, leaving decent dudes on the sidelines like 'Really? Have fun getting beat down and wondering how you're gonna get out, I guess.'

For every chick wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, good woman to get the praise and attention of males, there's some dude out there wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, humble man to get some shine. Tons of good women are thinking "I guess I have to start slutting it up to get a decent guy" while tons of good men are thinking "I guess I need to be a more arrogant jerk to get a decent guy."

Isn't that part of the journey in finding companionship, good people trying to find each other.

 

[dreaface]

Originally Posted by 23ska909red02

dreaface:

---

I think I've just given up on the idea having a good marriage with a good husband... it seems more like a fairy tale to be honest with you. I'll just let society 'win' I can be happy single.

 Btw "old lady" "main chick" sounds even worse. I dont see how people cant understand where I'm coming from society doesnt praise the faithful, good woman its always the girl thats taking off her clothes and vying for male attention. NT is a perfect example of this...

Do men seem to flock towards the half naked attention seekers? Yep, and the decent chick on the sidelines is like 'What the hell, man?' But you know what? That decent chick is locked in on some cocky, billy bad-a, deadbeat dad type, leaving decent dudes on the sidelines like 'Really? Have fun getting beat down and wondering how you're gonna get out, I guess.'

For every chick wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, good woman to get the praise and attention of males, there's some dude out there wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, humble man to get some shine. Tons of good women are thinking "I guess I have to start slutting it up to get a decent guy" while tons of good men are thinking "I guess I need to be a more arrogant jerk to get a decent guy."

Isn't that part of the journey in finding companionship, good people trying to find each other.

 

[kenji714]

Originally Posted by whywesteppin

Originally Posted by 23ska909red02

dreaface:

---

I think I've just given up on the idea having a good marriage with a good husband... it seems more like a fairy tale to be honest with you. I'll just let society 'win' I can be happy single.

 Btw "old lady" "main chick" sounds even worse. I dont see how people cant understand where I'm coming from society doesnt praise the faithful, good woman its always the girl thats taking off her clothes and vying for male attention. NT is a perfect example of this...

Do men seem to flock towards the half naked attention seekers? Yep, and the decent chick on the sidelines is like 'What the hell, man?' But you know what? That decent chick is locked in on some cocky, billy bad-a, deadbeat dad type, leaving decent dudes on the sidelines like 'Really? Have fun getting beat down and wondering how you're gonna get out, I guess.'

For every chick wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, good woman to get the praise and attention of males, there's some dude out there wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, humble man to get some shine. Tons of good women are thinking "I guess I have to start slutting it up to get a decent guy" while tons of good men are thinking "I guess I need to be a more arrogant jerk to get a decent guy."

Didn't know you rolled like that, ska. You free this weekend? I'm an arrogant jerk. 

 

[kenji714]

Originally Posted by whywesteppin

Originally Posted by 23ska909red02

dreaface:

---

I think I've just given up on the idea having a good marriage with a good husband... it seems more like a fairy tale to be honest with you. I'll just let society 'win' I can be happy single.

 Btw "old lady" "main chick" sounds even worse. I dont see how people cant understand where I'm coming from society doesnt praise the faithful, good woman its always the girl thats taking off her clothes and vying for male attention. NT is a perfect example of this...

Do men seem to flock towards the half naked attention seekers? Yep, and the decent chick on the sidelines is like 'What the hell, man?' But you know what? That decent chick is locked in on some cocky, billy bad-a, deadbeat dad type, leaving decent dudes on the sidelines like 'Really? Have fun getting beat down and wondering how you're gonna get out, I guess.'

For every chick wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, good woman to get the praise and attention of males, there's some dude out there wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, humble man to get some shine. Tons of good women are thinking "I guess I have to start slutting it up to get a decent guy" while tons of good men are thinking "I guess I need to be a more arrogant jerk to get a decent guy."

Didn't know you rolled like that, ska. You free this weekend? I'm an arrogant jerk. 

 

[dreaface]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Andrea, few question

1. Do you plan on having kids? Desire, etc. If you don't marry, are you willing to do it by yourself?

2. I see where you are coming from about marriage. It is hard to want to commit to something when all you see is failure when it comes to that role. Either folks aren't married or folks are divorced. The 30 year love-fest is rare. But it happens, so there is hope. But you want to do what is probable and not base your decisions on hope. I understand. But my question is, what sparked this feeling? Did a dude do you wrong? Did your parents have a nasty breakup? Just wondering what your base is.

1. No I dont want kids...but if I did I would definitely want to be [happily] married. My decision on wanting kids is partly based on the fact that I dont want to get married.
2. Nope I've been in a relationship for the past 5 years. This is actually my first real relationship that I've had so I'm lucky to have found someone to make it work with. My parents are divorced but I dont think that plays a huge part in my decision. I'm just basing it on what I see around me. You described it perfectly " But you want to do what is probable and not base your decisions on hope"

 

[dreaface]

Originally Posted by DCAllAmerican

Andrea, few question

1. Do you plan on having kids? Desire, etc. If you don't marry, are you willing to do it by yourself?

2. I see where you are coming from about marriage. It is hard to want to commit to something when all you see is failure when it comes to that role. Either folks aren't married or folks are divorced. The 30 year love-fest is rare. But it happens, so there is hope. But you want to do what is probable and not base your decisions on hope. I understand. But my question is, what sparked this feeling? Did a dude do you wrong? Did your parents have a nasty breakup? Just wondering what your base is.

1. No I dont want kids...but if I did I would definitely want to be [happily] married. My decision on wanting kids is partly based on the fact that I dont want to get married.
2. Nope I've been in a relationship for the past 5 years. This is actually my first real relationship that I've had so I'm lucky to have found someone to make it work with. My parents are divorced but I dont think that plays a huge part in my decision. I'm just basing it on what I see around me. You described it perfectly " But you want to do what is probable and not base your decisions on hope"

 

[mplsdunk]

Originally Posted by KenJi714

Originally Posted by whywesteppin

Originally Posted by 23ska909red02

Do men seem to flock towards the half naked attention seekers? Yep, and the decent chick on the sidelines is like 'What the hell, man?' But you know what? That decent chick is locked in on some cocky, billy bad-a, deadbeat dad type, leaving decent dudes on the sidelines like 'Really? Have fun getting beat down and wondering how you're gonna get out, I guess.'

For every chick wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, good woman to get the praise and attention of males, there's some dude out there wondering why it's so difficult for a faithful, humble man to get some shine. Tons of good women are thinking "I guess I have to start slutting it up to get a decent guy" while tons of good men are thinking "I guess I need to be a more arrogant jerk to get a decent guy."

Didn't know you rolled like that, ska. You free this weekend? I'm an arrogant jerk.