Why Are So Many Successful Black Women Unmarried?

[dirtylicious]

Originally Posted by blackmagnus514

but I think there's a difference to dating around vs. when you trying to pursue a REAL relationship....to have a backup in hand just in case it doesn't work out.

like I said on my blog, sometimes my backup is my hustle. i'm a workaholic. It just so happens that i hate being assed out when i like someone and it doesnt work out and I spent time,$ and emotions on this person. I'm a bit of a workaholic+party animal when i want to be and i'm always meeting people....I cant help that....girls knock it...but its not like they dont know what time it is.


....ok...but how do you get upset at the fact that a girl kept her own options open when you were doing the same thing?

 

[38816]

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

Originally Posted by blackmagnus514

but I think there's a difference to dating around vs. when you trying to pursue a REAL relationship....to have a backup in hand just in case it doesn't work out.

like I said on my blog, sometimes my backup is my hustle. i'm a workaholic. It just so happens that i hate being assed out when i like someone and it doesnt work out and I spent time,$ and emotions on this person. I'm a bit of a workaholic+party animal when i want to be and i'm always meeting people....I cant help that....girls knock it...but its not like they dont know what time it is.

....ok...but how do you get upset at the fact that a girl kept her own options open when you were doing the same thing?



exactamundo.

the reason i don't understand the whole Main and Sidepeices thing....

if you privy to sides, stick to the sides, @@@@$, you can be full off like...6 sides...

if your privy to a main, stick to the main, shouldn't be no sides to a MAIN course...you cats got corn and rice @%!!$@% up the full flavor of the grilledlobster

(yes, reference to my other post)

 

[nawlinsjunkie]

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

Originally Posted by blackmagnus514

but I think there's a difference to dating around vs. when you trying to pursue a REAL relationship....to have a backup in hand just in case it doesn't work out.

like I said on my blog, sometimes my backup is my hustle. i'm a workaholic. It just so happens that i hate being assed out when i like someone and it doesnt work out and I spent time,$ and emotions on this person. I'm a bit of a workaholic+party animal when i want to be and i'm always meeting people....I cant help that....girls knock it...but its not like they dont know what time it is.

....ok...but how do you get upset at the fact that a girl kept her own options open when you were doing the same thing?


I think that was his "learning" experience...I remember blackmagnus and I were talkin about that in a thread I made way back when mygirlfriend broke up with me to get with another guy, less than 24 hours after calling me to tell me that she loved me, missed me, etc...after that incident Ibasically gave up and since then I've avoided any type of commitment. I've occasionally talked with some girls who liked me, and even though I wasattracted to physically and mentally, I remembered that to most females, with all these dudes constantly trying to get at them, you're never the onlyoption at any given time, so why not act the same for now?I'm young so theres plenty of time to find a real relationship down the line, but females intheir early 20s are too fickle for me, so its not even worth it

 

[blackmagnus514]

....ok...but how do you get upset at the fact that a girl kept her own options open when you were doing the same thing?
that was my learning experience..after that i was like this is mad wack....to me it was the blatant disrespect. Like I went to Jersey for theweekend and that's what she did. You wouldnt feel some type of way about it? Yes, NJ, you remember that...I do as well.

Let the chips fall where they may...I have my freedom and i use it accordingly. i dont knock a girl for having options...i do the same thing...just be honestand keep it 100%. worse comes to worse, we can be friends with benefits.

 

[kix4kix]

Originally Posted by thytkerjobs

"backups" to me show signs of insecurity. i dont see why its so hard to just give your all to 1 person, and if things dont work its not the end of the world to be alone until someone else comes along. the need for a constant "somebody" in your life just show that you're incapable of being alone at any point in time.

99.9% of ones relationships will end in breakup. So I think it is perfectly logical to have a back up. What isn't logical is expecting said relationship towork.

 

[38816]

Originally Posted by kix4kix

Originally Posted by thytkerjobs

"backups" to me show signs of insecurity. i dont see why its so hard to just give your all to 1 person, and if things dont work its not the end of the world to be alone until someone else comes along. the need for a constant "somebody" in your life just show that you're incapable of being alone at any point in time.

99.9% of ones relationships will end in breakup. So I think it is perfectly logical to have a back up. What isn't logical is expecting said relationship to work.

one can argue the reason why the relationship wont work is because everyone is running around with "sides"

as if it's some sort of emotional safeguard...like, "oh, you were cheating? me too! somehow cheating on you makes it hurt less that you cheated onme....and we're breaking up...." why even be together?

that's lightweight lame, imo.

 

[throwedindagame]

This is the mindset of a man that turns to women of other races. Submission is a not what a women is supposed to do, and for the most part black women don't do it. This is what men want and this is why black men turn to women of other races who are more willing to serve their man. Compliment, Support, these are the traits of an ideal mate. Submission is what your pet is supposed to do, not your partner.

Exercise in logic, please follow:
Most people in the United States claim to be Christians

Colossians 3:18 (any translation)

Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
The words will vary but wives, husband and some verb/noun that delegates the authority of a woman to a man in the eyes of God will all be present.

The New Testament states that wives are supposed to be submissive to their husbands. If you argue that maybe half the self proclaimed Christians in Americaactually read the bible and attempt to follow it's teachings, then logic would suggest that millions of Americans believe that wives should be submissiveto their husbands. If this is stated in the old testament then maybe Jewish people also believe in this.

Add that number to the people who think wives should be submissive due to years of mainstream gender role conditioning.

I'm not Muslim but It would not surprise me if something to that effect was in the Qur'an as well.

Now we're talking a pretty large percentage of the U.S. and really the entire world.

Of course, we must not forget Colassians 3:19 is as follows

Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.
So women submit to their husbands, but husbands do not abuse your wives as if they were some kind of possessions. Too many dudes take thecolassians 3:18 and run with it without remembering the verse that immediately follows 3:18. It's a two part deal if you want to take a biblical look atmarriage.

 

[thytkerjobs]

Originally Posted by Nike Star Jay

Originally Posted by kix4kix

Originally Posted by thytkerjobs

"backups" to me show signs of insecurity. i dont see why its so hard to just give your all to 1 person, and if things dont work its not the end of the world to be alone until someone else comes along. the need for a constant "somebody" in your life just show that you're incapable of being alone at any point in time.

99.9% of ones relationships will end in breakup. So I think it is perfectly logical to have a back up. What isn't logical is expecting said relationship to work.

First off,

at your high *#% random percentage. Secondly, it's now illogical to expect relationships to work? Then why even put in the effort of being in one? Why even bother with having a gf/bf, it'd be best if you just keep smashing random people and living the single life. There's no point in having a backup. If things don't work out THEN you can go look for another person if you really need that rebound.

i

'd at that as well. but i agree with NSJ and enphan. kixyou're 1 of my fav nt'rs but you clearly are against commited relationships

like the male version of nyota lol.

 

[solefood229]

all chicks have a dude they can call right know if something goes wrong with their sa

they may not admit it but they do.


i dont think most females have anything to worry about when it comes to finding a mate, unless youre just like those women in that video

 

[cobra kai]

solefood229 wrote:

---

all chicks have a dude they can call right know if something goes wrong with their sa

they may not admit it but they do.


i dont think most females have anything to worry about when it comes to finding a mate, unless youre just like those women in that video
So do all dudes, though.

Everybody has somebody to fall back on if things don't go their way. Being that person must suck, though.

 

[cycopth]

from experience...........these girls don't know what they want. because of that they have become selfish and crazy. tv has also made them delusional(look at their high expectations). juss take a piece and bounce. in their eyes what theirs belongs to them and what is yours belongs to them. i feel no wayfor them, cause they are hard-headed already from the start and their "success" just makes their head even harder.

they dont want someone who is equal (successful) in match with them cause they cant put you down or look down at you. they want someone who is less than them(in their eyes), so they can mimic all of their tv shows they watch (basically boss you around), and walk all over you. too much control they want.

 

[38816]

it is illogical to think the relationship will work with backups present.

"Oh, you disagree?" -calls backup-


thats not how relationships work.

 

[kix4kix]

Originally Posted by eNPHAN

Originally Posted by kix4kix

Originally Posted by thytkerjobs

"backups" to me show signs of insecurity. i dont see why its so hard to just give your all to 1 person, and if things dont work its not the end of the world to be alone until someone else comes along. the need for a constant "somebody" in your life just show that you're incapable of being alone at any point in time.

99.9% of ones relationships will end in breakup. So I think it is perfectly logical to have a back up. What isn't logical is expecting said relationship to work.

one can argue the reason why the relationship wont work is because everyone is running around with "sides"

as if it's some sort of emotional safeguard...like, "oh, you were cheating? me too! somehow cheating on you makes it hurt less that you cheated on me....and we're breaking up...." why even be together?

that's lightweight lame, imo.

But that's what I just said bro.

But admittedly it didn'tmake much sense, What I meant was it isn't illogical to have a side piece, but what is illogical is to have a side piece and ac shocked when therelationship don't work.

 

[kix4kix]

Originally Posted by thytkerjobs

Originally Posted by Nike Star Jay

Originally Posted by kix4kix

Originally Posted by thytkerjobs

"backups" to me show signs of insecurity. i dont see why its so hard to just give your all to 1 person, and if things dont work its not the end of the world to be alone until someone else comes along. the need for a constant "somebody" in your life just show that you're incapable of being alone at any point in time.

99.9% of ones relationships will end in breakup. So I think it is perfectly logical to have a back up. What isn't logical is expecting said relationship to work.

First off,

at your high *#% random percentage. Secondly, it's now illogical to expect relationships to work? Then why even put in the effort of being in one? Why even bother with having a gf/bf, it'd be best if you just keep smashing random people and living the single life. There's no point in having a backup. If things don't work out THEN you can go look for another person if you really need that rebound.

i

'd at that as well. but i agree with NSJ and enphan. kix you're 1 of my fav nt'rs but you clearly are against commited relationships

like the male version of nyota lol.

You already know you on my indefinite swaglist, but when you thinkabout it if you aint getting hitched you just in the process of breaking up. I don't need no relationship to learn about myself I use meditation ya feelsme? Having a side piece is like picking a fight while you in Jail. You just adding to your situation. That doesn't mean some cats can't handle thesituation. And besides, I am all for commited relationships, the fact remains these floozies out here aint worth my commitance.

 

[capricorn1229]

Originally Posted by kix4kix

but when you think about it of you aint getting hitched you just in the process of breaking up. I don't need no relationship to learn about myself I use meditation ya feels me? Having a side piece is like picking a fight while you in Jail. You just adding to your situation. That doesn't mean some cats can't handle the situation. And besides, I am all for commited relationships, the fact remains these floozies out here aint worth my commitance.

See the thing is I know you are actually being serious and that you probably will get those side jonts that will have no idea you think they are trash or theyknow it they they just ignore it trying to think they can change you. Staying around longer than they should trying to look in deeper for some warmth.

 

[38816]

well, as long as we agree.......

 

[kix4kix]

Originally Posted by Capricorn1229

Originally Posted by kix4kix

but when you think about it of you aint getting hitched you just in the process of breaking up. I don't need no relationship to learn about myself I use meditation ya feels me? Having a side piece is like picking a fight while you in Jail. You just adding to your situation. That doesn't mean some cats can't handle the situation. And besides, I am all for commited relationships, the fact remains these floozies out here aint worth my commitance.

See the thing is I know you are actually being serious and that you probably will get those side jonts that will have no idea you think they are trash or they know it they they just ignore it trying to think they can change you. Staying around longer than they should trying to look in deeper for some warmth.

I just wait unil THEY get the message. I am all about non-verbalcommunication. Just for giggles I'll give an example.

I had a chick who was messing with me for about 2 months or so. I was doing my thing or what not, then right before winter vacation she tells me she sad cuzher and her BF broke up. I had the

face on, cuz the chic aint even let me know. Like she assumed I was coo with that. Dropped her on site. I don't play that mess. Atleast havethe decensy to let me know I am perpitrating. I would let any chick who wasn't my main know the deal. And to be honest, I let the main even know afterwardsin full detail, and brutal honesty. If they want to leave GL finding a man who is cleaner and shares my demeanor, cuz I sure aint trippin.

 

[veryanalytical85]

Didn't realize this was such an issue in the Black community. But for those of other ethnicities (Caucasian, Asian, Latino males) by dating Black and otherethnic women, is it the same problem for you all? Personally I feel as an Asian-American Male a lot of the women I meet (especially those of Asian/Mixed AsianAmerican descent) are still on a "girl" mentality and haven't even matured to even earn the right of being known as a woman. As what a lot ofother NT'ers have chimed in, I like to keep things honest (even if things aren't working out or that I've been dating around). However to have thesame to be reciprocated is few and far between.

 

[sooperhooper]

Originally Posted by memphisboi55

Too strong.
Too independent.
Can do w/o a man attitude.
No time for sex.
No time for nothing but their career.

in a nutshell.
most men want a woman that's a bit submissive and recognizes him as the bread winner. Sista ain't havin that.

 

[nash]

Nineteen pages on this junk?

 

[blackmagnus514]

double

 

[blackmagnus514]

The New Testament states that wives are supposed to be submissive to their husbands. If you argue that maybe half the self proclaimed Christians in America actually read the bible and attempt to follow it's teachings, then logic would suggest that millions of Americans believe that wives should be submissive to their husbands. If this is stated in the old testament then maybe Jewish people also believe in this.

Funny...marriage vows for woman are "love, honor and obey" as well....

About backups....i think if you're in a committed relationship, that should be ya'll. No backups and w/e issues you have should be worked outbetween you. When i say backups/options, I'm referring to the dating realm.

 

[optimusprimeaphia]

Originally Posted by kicksfiend

Originally Posted by Yeezy St Laurent

Originally Posted by ninjahood

i heard in atlanta da men are so outnumbered by women that they actually holla at u......

Originally Posted by blackmagnus514

heard that too, i heard they MAD aggressive too

That happened to me when I was there

National NT Summit in Atlanta? I'm down to chill with fellow NTer's and fail to meet the relationship expectations of multiple successful black women (as long as they realize that after we spend the night together).

OHLEHDEWIT!

</FLOCKA!>

 

[ronj23]

Originally Posted by OptimusPrimeAPhiA

Originally Posted by kicksfiend

Originally Posted by Yeezy St Laurent

Originally Posted by ninjahood

i heard in atlanta da men are so outnumbered by women that they actually holla at u......

Originally Posted by blackmagnus514

heard that too, i heard they MAD aggressive too

That happened to me when I was there

National NT Summit in Atlanta? I'm down to chill with fellow NTer's and fail to meet the relationship expectations of multiple successful black women (as long as they realize that after we spend the night together).

OHLEHDEWIT!

</FLOCKA!>

that is not how you spell it fam

its OLEDOIT

 

[optimusprimeaphia]

Originally Posted by ronj23

Originally Posted by OptimusPrimeAPhiA

Originally Posted by kicksfiend

Originally Posted by Yeezy St Laurent

Originally Posted by ninjahood

i heard in atlanta da men are so outnumbered by women that they actually holla at u......

Originally Posted by blackmagnus514

heard that too, i heard they MAD aggressive too

That happened to me when I was there

National NT Summit in Atlanta? I'm down to chill with fellow NTer's and fail to meet the relationship expectations of multiple successful black women (as long as they realize that after we spend the night together).

OHLEHDEWIT!

</FLOCKA!>

that is not how you spell it fam

its OLEDOIT

mine is more phonetically accurate.



Die slow.

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