Wifing a Girl Who...... (update page 3)

[tim teufel]

If you feel she is worth it talk to her and feel her out. The eyes never lie Chico

 

[greatesqueape]

let her go, stand up for yourself. she's obviously still in love with dude, no need to waste your time and effort on a situation like this.

 

[|A-Man|]

She don't want to be saved man.

 

[cafinest23]

Be careful fam dude has her mind, body, and soul jack.

 

[nymvp]

Originally Posted by blazinRook

U ever run your concerns by her?

I too think ur fighting an uphill battle..but u can help her realize what she's doing..hopefully she can work out her stuff..and maybe later y'all can see wsup, but as for now..it's not a good look

 

[ladieslovechris]

Originally Posted by chokeonsmoke

Do what you want bro its your life

 

[wwsindicate]

Originally Posted by GrimlocK

I remember when people used to post cliffs.

Spoiler

Spoiler

Spoiler [+]

Spoiler

be patient...

 

[nychiphophippo]

She rolled through with Valentines Day gifts for my mom and sis and I said !$*! it theres a reason why shes trying so hard to win them and me
over so I wifed it. And I kinda regret it already. She keeps saying I love u and when I say it back I know I barely mean it. Whatever though. I didn't
want to let another man control how I live my life. And if he wins in the end then I think what she could have been was worth fighting for. I also wanna use this as a learning experience on how to treat women, love, romance, etc.

I def do think there's a high possibility that even months removed from her relationship that I'm a rebound cuz I just found out AFTER telling her I want something more serious too ab some other #%%@ she's been through. This probably won't end well for me but eff it. And even though I didn't take it, thanks for the advice fellow NTers. I'll rem to update this and let u guys learn from my experience how this eventually turns out.

 

[night marcher01]

Originally Posted by nYcHipHopHippo

She rolled through with Valentines Day gifts for my mom and sis and I said !$*! it theres a reason why shes trying so hard to win them and me
over so I wifed it. And I kinda regret it already. She keeps saying I love u and when I say it back I know I barely mean it. Whatever though. I didn't
want to let another man control how I live my life. And if he wins in the end then I think what she could have been was worth fighting for. I also wanna use this as a learning experience on how to treat women, love, romance, etc.

I def do think there's a high possibility that even months removed from her relationship that I'm a rebound cuz I just found out AFTER telling her I want something more serious too ab some other #%%@ she's been through. This probably won't end well for me but eff it. And even though I didn't take it, thanks for the advice fellow NTers. I'll rem to update this and let u guys learn from my experience how this eventually turns out.

Wow! Damn OP... It's ashame to see the change of emotions in your post from now compared to your original post.

You know what's your first real mistake bro? And I'm being completely honest... But coming on here to ask NT for advice about your situation. You're letting a bunch of dudes who don't know you or her or anything about you dictate your feelings.

You should never do that! It's like talking to elderly people, they always think they are always right, always thinking they know what's best. On some "don't do it, I made that mistake when I was kid" or "I already been through what your going through so I already know what's gonna happen"... Hell no, you gotta live YOUR life! That's what life is about, taking chances and building and learning from experiences.

Goodluck homie!

 

[8pm at msg]

Well if that's the choice you want to make then all I can do is wish you good luck. Just remember if BS starts becoming the norm, whether it be this dude from her past or whatever other issues she has it might be best to go the other way.

 

[alchemist iq]

Son, I got a 4G Phone this thing promise me fast internet that will render pics really quickly. I got two both from Sprint and Verizon, I'm disappoint....

 

[nawlinsjunkie]

I think every guy ends up with a girlfriend like this once in their lives 

My ex from a few years back swore she was in love with me. Funny thing is, I had rejected her twice already, not because I didn't have feelings for her, but because I was being extra cautious. When we finally got together, she kept telling me "You're so much better than my ex...all he did was cheat on me, disrespect me, etc. he still calls me to talk @#%" and all that other nonsense. I offered to talk to him and suggested that she change her number, but she said "No, don't do that; I don't want any drama" so I let it slide.

 I'm not even exaggerating : the MORNING AFTER she tells me that she's "seriously in love" with me, she texts me : "I can't do this, I'm so sorry......I can't be with anyone right now"with 0 explanation, and then she starts ignoring my texts/calls/etc..

Few months later I find out from a mutual acquaintance that she was cheating on me with the same dude she was complaining 24/7 about. Naturally I was heartbroken, until I learned that she got pregnant (and I know it's not mine, I always strapped up, and the baby was born 11 months after she broke up with me). I was so relieved I literally did a jumping fist pump and called my boys over for celebratory beer pong

I don't even feel mad or angry at her anymore, cause her baby daddy has completely vanished after she gave birth. That should be punishment enough...but even to this day, I feel angry at myself for getting with an undercover hood rat

Basically I learned that any girl who's always talking about her ex, even if it's negative, still feels for him if she's mentioning him that much, keeping in touch with him, etc.

 

[put em up]

Originally Posted by tim teufel

If you feel she is worth it talk to her and feel her out. The eyes never lie Chico

You and OP are suckers.

 

[tego calderon el abayarde]

OP you're doin it wrong.

I already know what the update or your new thread is gonna sound like

 

[sportsjunkie]

Originally Posted by nYcHipHopHippo

Will this be able to end well..
This girl who I've been dating for 4 months has been telling me that she wants to have a serious relationship and has told me she's loved me for ab a month now. I'm 22 and she's 20 btw. About 6 months before she met me she had just gotten out of a 4 year relationship. So from soph year HS to soph year of college. The dude was her first for everything and she was crazy about him to the point that he would cheat on her nonstop and she'd stay with him no matter what. Dude would even cheat in parties she was at, once had a girl visit a social at his house and told his girl hes been having sex with her, and cheated on the day she had an abortion. And he eventually dumped her after 4 years for someone else instead of her saying it was enough. I know im disgusted by it too that she stayed with him but she was his first everything from a young age and they lived down the block from each other and dude had bread so it was hard for her to let go. She then continued having relations with him after their break up for a while but that ended before she and i met. Dude moved but now sees her at the gym she works at, still tries sweet talking her ab their past, and still on rare occasions tries hitting her up and told her he just wants to be friends which is obviously %#$!+%*+.

Girl then says to me ab a week ago shes changing her num so people from her past dont hit her up. I assumed he'd be a person she doesnt give her new num too but i saw she texted it to him and flipped yesterday that she had the chance to move on from that abusive dude but still kept him in her life esp when she has me, says she loves me, and wants a relationship. She then tells me she's not completely over him and said that she cant completely let go of someone that meant that much to her, and she misses the love and affection she would get. And even somewhat defended his actions by saying he was immature and not ready for a monogamous relationship and still isnt which is why he cheats on the girl hes with now. Theres a different between that and being completely grimey and doing it right in front of her. She did say though that she'll never allow herself to be with him again.

I then realized I've been giving her so little of that and she still loves me and has been with only me since we've been dating (her best friend lives with and in a relationship with my best friend and she tells him everything.) And I havent been doing it cuz i dont want her loving me any more than she does and eventually breaking her heart.

I've never been in a serious relationship before but this chicks beautiful, smart, on point with what shes doing in life and school, and seems to be willing to give me everything I want and need from a girl. The only thing I'm worried ab is that dude seems to have some kind of mind !#@! over her that might never end. And everything I do for her is just her trying to relive the memories of him. And also that she'll always have a place for that dude even though he was beyond grimey. And obviously worst of all that she'll go back to him.

I think by showing her the love and affection she wants/misses she might eventually be able to move on from that and realize she has someone and something better than shes ever had. But on the other hand its like she'll always wish it was him she can be with.

NTers with wisdom/experience in the game, is this chick bad news cuz of her past or should i just say !#@! it and give it a chance and by giving her what she needs in that regard she'll eventually be able to get over it and realize he should have no place in her life.

DO NOT GET IN A SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP WITH HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  HER EX BOYFRIEND CAN TAP THAT WHEN HE WANTS.  TELL HER THAT YALL CAN BE FRIENDS THATS IT.  YALL CAN BE FRIENDS BECAUSE SHE WAS HONEST WITH YOU. BOTH OF YALL YOUNG. SHE WAS 20 (SHE DONT KNOW WHAT SHE WANTS. SHE CONFUSED) DONT GET IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH HER.

  

 

[finnns2003]

at wifing her. Good lord...

 

[jking0821]

You can never really judge a situation like this unless you are in it.  Everyone has known getting with a chick was prob a bad idea and did it anyway because emotions are involved (and by emotions i mean P)
Good Luck OP.  Try not to get too emotionally attached.  Keep her at arms length until she really proves herself to you.

 

[donttalkitlivit]

I respect ur decision, because it's ur choice. But ur simpin HARD. U just said u didnt want him to dictate ur life, and then he did... u got wit someone ur already regretting being with? WACK

 

[BranchLifestyle]

Um, pics?

 

[quincy powell]

DON'T SAVE HER.

 

[datboi81]

is there a reason why you replace the word "about" with "ab" ? is that new internet lingo i don't know yet? either way, i'll fully read later and chime in.

 

[nychiphophippo]

First off by wifing I mean exclusively seeing each other, being public ab our relationship like letting people know ur in relationship and unavailable. Not marrying like some of u guys think

Just spoke to my sis who's older, married with kids...basically she told me every girl deserves a chance at being treated right. Told me she wasn't a saint when she was younger, had an attachment to another guy even after marriage, but she always stuck with her husband and that her husband changed her.

I got surgery and was bedridden and on crutches for 5 weeks and she would come to my crib all the time while I was going through that, and has done a lot to change herself for me. I really never did anything affectionate/romantic, or bought her anything, but she still tried so hard to win me over and I think there's a reason for it.

My sis then told me that if I'm not emotionally attached to that extent and dont plan on being together very long term then I need to stop stressing and just enjoy what I have now.

 

[zoomgp]

Probably wont end well n ur gonna tire yourself out cuzz this chick is gonna keep in contact n possibly cheat regardless of how much u tell her not to etc etc

But u have to learn on ya own n altho the signs point to a disaster... It isnt definite.

Goodluck

 

[retro23j]

Originally Posted by nYcHipHopHippo

And if he wins in the end then I think what she could have been was worth fighting for.

You're fighting for her potential and what you're imagining she's capable of after being exposed to what she's really doing?

You're blinding yourself yung bol.

 

[nychiphophippo]

My sis also told me that she was with this guy that was a thug when she was younger. My old school dad found out about it and threatened to kill him and scared him away. My mom then told the guy and his mom that if he really wants to be with her that if he gets himself and his life together that one day he can come back. Dude eventually finished school and got on point with his stuff and contacted my sis but by that time my sis had been married and told him its too late. The guys mom then called a few days later to thank my sister and my mom for being the reason he changed his life.

The moral of the story from my sis is that one person is capable of changing another ones life. The odds are stacked against me but $#** it gunna just ride out with this.