Any1 here deal with social anxiety/phobia?

[rickwonder]

Op I advise you to see professional help. This is an actual psychological disorder called social anxiety disorder. I know because a close friend of mine has it. He is real comfortable and almost near arrogant with ppl he knew from back in the days. With strangers, girls, work etc he has the same problems. But my dude has it worst because his anxiety shows. He looks like Patrick Ewing in the 4th quarter. I feel bad for him and he never had this problem until a few years ago. I mean we can go eat, clubbing, chilling anything and he'll just start getting real antsy and start sweating. Usually, his anxiety is triggered by one of his perceived fear factors as our group of friends like to call it. To be honest, since he began to get help and opened up to us about it, he's been a lot better. Do yourself a favor OP and go get help. If you have Ny questions you can ask me, I'll try to find out for you.

 

[da doc03]

Originally Posted by ricky409

Lemme break this down in a crisp and clear manner fambs.

Either A. You think people are focusing in on you or B. You worried about being embarrassed or humiliated.

Solution for A. Understand that rarely... RARELY are any dambs given when it cones to you... folks aren't watching you, folks aren't saying "that guy is this or that ". You're just another face, fambs

Solution for B. Get some kind of job where you have to talk to people cuz your money depends on it. Get a commissioned based job at a women's shoe store...

This will give you confidence cuz women HAVE to talk to you...

Once you get confidence (confidence = not giving a damb what people think) you'll be straight!

  

 

[Fong$tarr]

I find myself the most confident person at times. I am not shy at all but when it comes to work in this corporate environment, I tend to always clam up and never wanting to talk to anyone. Part of it has to do with me doing something I am not too familier with (insurance) and part of it is cause I don't really fit well with the people here. It's not like I am ghetto but people here seems like they came from white picket fences or something.

Anyways.....it's crazy how that happens and find myself feeling anxiety when people are around me.

 

[solexsup]

I cant speak outloud for like a presentation or something of that sort. I get all nervous and turn tomato red, thats my only problem :/

 

[brocomeatme]

i use to be like that, than i joined a fraternity.

 

[imvictor]

Originally Posted by Rusty Shackelford

I don't know if it's social anxiety but
Everytime i'm in public I feel people are judging me every where I go

Whether they are looking at me or not

I'm great at public speaking so it's weird

This. 

 

[whyhellothere]

why can't people just leave quiet people alone?
acting like i'm some sort of zoo animal because i choose to sit away from the rest of the class

nobody even noticed until you made it an issue & then all period i have these people looking at me like im on display or something 
4 more months 

 

[ricky409]

Originally Posted by blakep267

Originally Posted by ricky409

Lemme break this down in a crisp and clear manner fambs.

Either A. You think people are focusing in on you or B. You worried about being embarrassed or humiliated.

Solution for A. Understand that rarely... RARELY are any dambs given when it cones to you... folks aren't watching you, folks aren't saying "that guy is this or that ". You're just another face, fambs

Solution for B. Get some kind of job where you have to talk to people cuz your money depends on it. Get a commissioned based job at a women's shoe store...

This will give you confidence cuz women HAVE to talk to you...

Once you get confidence (confidence = not giving a damb what people think) you'll be straight!

of course I know people arent watching me, but I still have the anxious feeling when in crowds. Its just how it is for the time being. Ex. I know whenever I give speeches in class, nobody  really cares. i dont even care when other give speeches. but I still get that crazy anxious/nervous feeling when it comes to it. I can rationalize it now, but when Im in the moment I dont think that way.  And the thread really wasnt about women, I was just using that as an example. Its more of dealing with strangers in general
  

Also Im pretty sure part of my anxiety comes from the fact that I used to stutter when I was a kid. So whenever Im speaking to people I get really anxious about not stuttering because I think they'll judge me ( most people dont but there are the a-holes that giggle and laugh) and being so anxious about not doing it, makes me actually stutter. so its like an endless cycle.

fambs... i feel all what you said... i used to actually be clinically depressed...
not the same, but its a battle in your mind... 

the main goal is to understand that you are battling against yourself... and many people are having the same problem as you.

you always have this "anxious" feeling... do you ever stop to think that maybe... they're anxious as well?

you never stop to think that "damb... why is this guy so anxious/nervous? i aint worried about you, fambs"  

when you understand that your mind is going thru similar stuff to everyone else, then you'll see that you're normal... and there's no reason to be super anxious/nervous...

 

[an dee 51o]

There are a bunch of different levels of anxiety, from being shy, to borderline paranoia. I fall closer to the latter. That's why I started taking anti-anxiety meds, but stopped after they made me a zombie. I promise to only mention medical marijuana once, but it really did save my life. Although I am still an introvert, it has made me way more sociable.

 

[georgecantstandya]

I'm fine socially, now at least. It was really bad in high school. but the biggest problem i have is EATING in social situations. I get nervous really easily and just the thought of food makes me want to throw up. I have an extremely weak stomach, anytime i go to eat with friends or on a date i have to eat extremely slow and only a few bites (that's usually all i can keep down). everybody is like "wth is wrong with you?" When I'm with my family, I'm fine and can eat anything and everything. I know it's all mental but i have been struggling with it for years. This problem has kept me from enjoying a better social life but it has been getting better since high school.

 

[ill steelo]

Self confidence homie.

I used to stutter when I was a kid too. Really really bad. What made it worse was that whenever I had a convo, the little kids with the short attention span used to walk off right in the middle of my sentences as I'm struggling mightily to pronounce a damn word

Cats used to clown me in class when the teacher called on me to read and I stuttered on damn near every word

My mother enrolled me in a class at my school and I got it fixed eventually.

But I still used to get nervous that it would strike back at some point when I'm in convo with someone.

Only way I got past that was continually putting myself in positions where I had to speak to folk I didn't know. I mostly did this in student organizations where we had network with the people that we invited to meetings.

Now, I could a give a damn if I'm talking to 1 stranger or a thousand.

The best way that you can get past this OP is to continually step out of your comfort zone and speak homie!

Just remember to relax and be at ease. It worked for me

 

[jrdnsrnss]

I experience something similar to OP. HATE talking to people out in public, i worked retail for close to five years and i was able to talk to people because i had to. But when it comes to a non work setting i can never talk to people or initiate conversation. Walking up to girls i can never do just cause i lack the self confidence to do it. Should be more aggressive when it comes to things like this but at the same time its just my personality type. I know i'm a shy introvert which doesn't help anything at all. When i had to give speeches in front of a class it was torture, felt like every eyeball in the room is fixated on me and their just waiting for me to %+#% up and judge me.

I've got the why are you so quiet several times and my homies try to take me to clubs and parties to get me out of my comfort zone thinking it'll help me but really it just makes me extremely uncomfortable.

 

[mf doomer]

Being introverted and self confident are intertwined in a introverted personality. I could say 'i'm confident', but until someone speaks the measurements of confidence in the real world is always speculated. I don't get it. shy/introversion, fine line and difference. Another thing is to speak up, even if your wrong it's better to say something than nothing.

 

[mrdieselfuel09]

Never thought of me having this disorder, until today.

 Company had a Valentines Day gathering in the meeting room, I felt pretty controlled walking in there and once I see how many people were in there conversating, I just grabbed the food and bounced back to my cubicle. Not sure why..maybe because I'm still new to the job or what. Not a good feeling...

 

[8pm at msg]

Just keep working at it. I know how you feel, I used to be the same way in high school. Over time I've become better at verbalizing myself in public to others, not to mention working retail will force you to interact with people. After sometime, it becomes easier and it just flows. I also had confidence issues because I gained weight, but I been working on that recently. Taking care of your physical appearance also helps when it comes to confidence.

 

[ayodun]

I do. I get along fairly well NOW after years of constantly pushing myself to go outside my limits but it still isn't where I want to be and has taken too long with not enough progress imo. I'm not the best with women because of this but my looks usually outweigh the initial awkwardness and I rarely have trouble smashing

I'm planning on seeing a therapist within this month to help and hopefully speed this up and becoming a social butterfly which is what I really want. I've read all you can read on this and no matter how much sense all the advice makes it is easier said then done. The fear is too overwhelming to follow the advice most of the time.

 

[tupac jordan]

It started in 7th grade for me. I used to be the dumb kid that had trouble reading. Every time it was my turn to read aloud my peers would bust out laughing because I couldn't read more than 4 words in a row without help. Plus I couldn't read without having my finger right under the word and my lips moving. One day I said "F it!" And just became the class clown. My confidence shot through the roof and I'm now reading and writing at an 8th grade level.

 

[fly23s]

Lol do anybody else have this feeling. when a girl looks at me I automatically assume she likes me and get all Moody. Why?