Bathroom habits Vol. At Work

[eb4president]

Yo is it just me. But I feel like I have some of the strangest bathroom habits while a work1. Will never take a number 2 on the same floor I work. Will always go up or down a level(sometimes 2 or 3 floors)2. I laugh so hard when standing at a urinal and a neighbor(normally senior manager) just farts like it's nothing :Rollin3. Build the ultimate tissue fort when sitting down, layers on layers, on layersAny one else?Side note: every time I use the urinal there is like hair on the edge and I'm always thinking man these people nasty

 

[eb4president]

Yo is it just me. But I feel like I have some of the strangest bathroom habits while a work1. Will never take a number 2 on the same floor I work. Will always go up or down a level(sometimes 2 or 3 floors)2. I laugh so hard when standing at a urinal and a neighbor(normally senior manager) just farts like it's nothing :Rollin3. Build the ultimate tissue fort when sitting down, layers on layers, on layersAny one else?Side note: every time I use the urinal there is like hair on the edge and I'm always thinking man these people nasty

 

[teamjordan79]

got me my own bathroom word to george costanza 

 

[teamjordan79]

got me my own bathroom word to george costanza 

 

[mojodmonky1]

Originally Posted by EB4President

3. Build the ultimate tissue fort when sitting down, layers on layers,   

our office bathroom situations seem way different so its probably not fair to say this but damn do i hate people like you.  I work for a smaller company so our offices dont take up the entire floor of our highrise.  We share the floor (and by default, the floor bathroom) with 2-3 other companies on the same floor.  There is one a-hole on our floor (yet to be determined who) that I refer to as the double +#%% gasket bandit.  There are only 2 stalls in the bathroom.  One is the handicap stall that is has the privacy of being tucked in the corner, and it is very spacious and open.  The 2nd stall is tight as hell.  ATLEAST once every 2 weeks I will walk in there and one of the stalls (usually the handicap stall) is rendered useless by the D-A-G-B.  That fool will lay down no less than 8 seperate +#%% gaskets.  The worst part is HE DOESNT CLEAN UP AFTER HES DONE!  I aint tryin to touch another mans +#%% gasket.  I mean really... who does that?  It's almost like he is teasing the rest of us on the floor.  A double hand double finger F-U to everyone.  Not only is the toilet completely covered in used +#%% gaskets, but he also uses up 2 rolls of TP and leaves his poop behind.  I still dont know how he manages to do that since all the toilets have automatic flush sensors.  Maybe the sensor is blocked by all of the damn paper he is using?

Just typing this out has gotten me all riled up.  I'm effin livid right now.  For the next month, if I ever go to the bathroom and hear someone in the stall, I'm waiting til they come out so I can check.  The day I find the D-A-G-B is the day I will get arrested for kicking him in the belly, then smashing his face into the damn toilet so it can marinate in the mess he left for everyone else.

 

[mojodmonky1]

Originally Posted by EB4President

3. Build the ultimate tissue fort when sitting down, layers on layers,   

our office bathroom situations seem way different so its probably not fair to say this but damn do i hate people like you.  I work for a smaller company so our offices dont take up the entire floor of our highrise.  We share the floor (and by default, the floor bathroom) with 2-3 other companies on the same floor.  There is one a-hole on our floor (yet to be determined who) that I refer to as the double +#%% gasket bandit.  There are only 2 stalls in the bathroom.  One is the handicap stall that is has the privacy of being tucked in the corner, and it is very spacious and open.  The 2nd stall is tight as hell.  ATLEAST once every 2 weeks I will walk in there and one of the stalls (usually the handicap stall) is rendered useless by the D-A-G-B.  That fool will lay down no less than 8 seperate +#%% gaskets.  The worst part is HE DOESNT CLEAN UP AFTER HES DONE!  I aint tryin to touch another mans +#%% gasket.  I mean really... who does that?  It's almost like he is teasing the rest of us on the floor.  A double hand double finger F-U to everyone.  Not only is the toilet completely covered in used +#%% gaskets, but he also uses up 2 rolls of TP and leaves his poop behind.  I still dont know how he manages to do that since all the toilets have automatic flush sensors.  Maybe the sensor is blocked by all of the damn paper he is using?

Just typing this out has gotten me all riled up.  I'm effin livid right now.  For the next month, if I ever go to the bathroom and hear someone in the stall, I'm waiting til they come out so I can check.  The day I find the D-A-G-B is the day I will get arrested for kicking him in the belly, then smashing his face into the damn toilet so it can marinate in the mess he left for everyone else.

 

[Mound Raised]

i just know i lysol and TP pad the hell outa the toilet....for cushion and sanitation purposes

 

[Mound Raised]

i just know i lysol and TP pad the hell outa the toilet....for cushion and sanitation purposes

 

[ooiron manoo]

@ people that OD with paper tissue around the seat. It's really not that serious.

 

[ooiron manoo]

@ people that OD with paper tissue around the seat. It's really not that serious.

 

[tfromthe617]

Originally Posted by Mojodmonky1

Originally Posted by EB4President

3. Build the ultimate tissue fort when sitting down, layers on layers,   

our office bathroom situations seem way different so its probably not fair to say this but damn do i hate people like you.  I work for a smaller company so our offices dont take up the entire floor of our highrise.  We share the floor (and by default, the floor bathroom) with 2-3 other companies on the same floor.  There is one a-hole on our floor (yet to be determined who) that I refer to as the double +#%% gasket bandit.  There are only 2 stalls in the bathroom.  One is the handicap stall that is has the privacy of being tucked in the corner, and it is very spacious and open.  The 2nd stall is tight as hell.  ATLEAST once every 2 weeks I will walk in there and one of the stalls (usually the handicap stall) is rendered useless by the D-A-G-B.  That fool will lay down no less than 8 seperate +#%% gaskets.  The worst part is HE DOESNT CLEAN UP AFTER HES DONE!  I aint tryin to touch another mans +#%% gasket.  I mean really... who does that?  It's almost like he is teasing the rest of us on the floor.  A double hand double finger F-U to everyone.  Not only is the toilet completely covered in used +#%% gaskets, but he also uses up 2 rolls of TP and leaves his poop behind.  I still dont know how he manages to do that since all the toilets have automatic flush sensors.  Maybe the sensor is blocked by all of the damn paper he is using?

Just typing this out has gotten me all riled up.  I'm effin livid right now.  For the next month, if I ever go to the bathroom and hear someone in the stall, I'm waiting til they come out so I can check.  The day I find the D-A-G-B is the day I will get arrested for kicking him in the belly, then smashing his face into the damn toilet so it can marinate in the mess he left for everyone else.

i feel your pain but this whole story has me dying.. you make it sound like he's slowly ruining your life

 

[tfromthe617]

Originally Posted by Mojodmonky1

Originally Posted by EB4President

3. Build the ultimate tissue fort when sitting down, layers on layers,   

our office bathroom situations seem way different so its probably not fair to say this but damn do i hate people like you.  I work for a smaller company so our offices dont take up the entire floor of our highrise.  We share the floor (and by default, the floor bathroom) with 2-3 other companies on the same floor.  There is one a-hole on our floor (yet to be determined who) that I refer to as the double +#%% gasket bandit.  There are only 2 stalls in the bathroom.  One is the handicap stall that is has the privacy of being tucked in the corner, and it is very spacious and open.  The 2nd stall is tight as hell.  ATLEAST once every 2 weeks I will walk in there and one of the stalls (usually the handicap stall) is rendered useless by the D-A-G-B.  That fool will lay down no less than 8 seperate +#%% gaskets.  The worst part is HE DOESNT CLEAN UP AFTER HES DONE!  I aint tryin to touch another mans +#%% gasket.  I mean really... who does that?  It's almost like he is teasing the rest of us on the floor.  A double hand double finger F-U to everyone.  Not only is the toilet completely covered in used +#%% gaskets, but he also uses up 2 rolls of TP and leaves his poop behind.  I still dont know how he manages to do that since all the toilets have automatic flush sensors.  Maybe the sensor is blocked by all of the damn paper he is using?

Just typing this out has gotten me all riled up.  I'm effin livid right now.  For the next month, if I ever go to the bathroom and hear someone in the stall, I'm waiting til they come out so I can check.  The day I find the D-A-G-B is the day I will get arrested for kicking him in the belly, then smashing his face into the damn toilet so it can marinate in the mess he left for everyone else.

i feel your pain but this whole story has me dying.. you make it sound like he's slowly ruining your life

 

[hybridsoldier23]

Originally Posted by ooIRON MANoo

@ people that OD with paper tissue around the seat. It's really not that serious.

THIS.

 

[hybridsoldier23]

Originally Posted by ooIRON MANoo

@ people that OD with paper tissue around the seat. It's really not that serious.

THIS.

 

[4wrestling]

I bring my own toilet paper to work.  I can't use the single ply sandpaper they have here.  I'm delicate.

 

[4wrestling]

I bring my own toilet paper to work.  I can't use the single ply sandpaper they have here.  I'm delicate.

 

[ballinamillion1]

Everytime I use the bathroom I squat, therefore I never touch the seat.

 

[ballinamillion1]

Everytime I use the bathroom I squat, therefore I never touch the seat.

 

[mojodmonky1]

Originally Posted by Tfromthe617

Originally Posted by Mojodmonky1

Originally Posted by EB4President

3. Build the ultimate tissue fort when sitting down, layers on layers,   

our office bathroom situations seem way different so its probably not fair to say this but damn do i hate people like you.  I work for a smaller company so our offices dont take up the entire floor of our highrise.  We share the floor (and by default, the floor bathroom) with 2-3 other companies on the same floor.  There is one a-hole on our floor (yet to be determined who) that I refer to as the double +#%% gasket bandit.  There are only 2 stalls in the bathroom.  One is the handicap stall that is has the privacy of being tucked in the corner, and it is very spacious and open.  The 2nd stall is tight as hell.  ATLEAST once every 2 weeks I will walk in there and one of the stalls (usually the handicap stall) is rendered useless by the D-A-G-B.  That fool will lay down no less than 8 seperate +#%% gaskets.  The worst part is HE DOESNT CLEAN UP AFTER HES DONE!  I aint tryin to touch another mans +#%% gasket.  I mean really... who does that?  It's almost like he is teasing the rest of us on the floor.  A double hand double finger F-U to everyone.  Not only is the toilet completely covered in used +#%% gaskets, but he also uses up 2 rolls of TP and leaves his poop behind.  I still dont know how he manages to do that since all the toilets have automatic flush sensors.  Maybe the sensor is blocked by all of the damn paper he is using?

Just typing this out has gotten me all riled up.  I'm effin livid right now.  For the next month, if I ever go to the bathroom and hear someone in the stall, I'm waiting til they come out so I can check.  The day I find the D-A-G-B is the day I will get arrested for kicking him in the belly, then smashing his face into the damn toilet so it can marinate in the mess he left for everyone else.

i feel your pain but this whole story has me dying.. you make it sound like he's slowly ruining your life

hahahaha i'll admit it.  sometimes i let the little things get to me, and this really is getting to me.

we've (my coworkers and i) complained to building management about it so they put up signs in the bathroom and inside each stall that say something like "please refrain from using excessive amounts of paper in the toilets as it can create plumbing issues" or something to that effect.  Still the Double *#% Gasket Bandit continues.  My buddy took it a step further and left a very unprofessional message taped to the bathroom mirror that said something like "Hey you inconsiderate bleepety bleep.  How about you learn some bleepin manners and not bleep it up for the rest of us".  Still nothing.  I am full convinced that this dude is doing it just cause he knows it upsets the rest of us on the floor.  Thats why I have to resort to street justice once I find out who it is.  I'm pretty sure that dude will stop once he gets to taste his own doo doo. 
  

 

[mojodmonky1]

Originally Posted by Tfromthe617

Originally Posted by Mojodmonky1

Originally Posted by EB4President

3. Build the ultimate tissue fort when sitting down, layers on layers,   

our office bathroom situations seem way different so its probably not fair to say this but damn do i hate people like you.  I work for a smaller company so our offices dont take up the entire floor of our highrise.  We share the floor (and by default, the floor bathroom) with 2-3 other companies on the same floor.  There is one a-hole on our floor (yet to be determined who) that I refer to as the double +#%% gasket bandit.  There are only 2 stalls in the bathroom.  One is the handicap stall that is has the privacy of being tucked in the corner, and it is very spacious and open.  The 2nd stall is tight as hell.  ATLEAST once every 2 weeks I will walk in there and one of the stalls (usually the handicap stall) is rendered useless by the D-A-G-B.  That fool will lay down no less than 8 seperate +#%% gaskets.  The worst part is HE DOESNT CLEAN UP AFTER HES DONE!  I aint tryin to touch another mans +#%% gasket.  I mean really... who does that?  It's almost like he is teasing the rest of us on the floor.  A double hand double finger F-U to everyone.  Not only is the toilet completely covered in used +#%% gaskets, but he also uses up 2 rolls of TP and leaves his poop behind.  I still dont know how he manages to do that since all the toilets have automatic flush sensors.  Maybe the sensor is blocked by all of the damn paper he is using?

Just typing this out has gotten me all riled up.  I'm effin livid right now.  For the next month, if I ever go to the bathroom and hear someone in the stall, I'm waiting til they come out so I can check.  The day I find the D-A-G-B is the day I will get arrested for kicking him in the belly, then smashing his face into the damn toilet so it can marinate in the mess he left for everyone else.

i feel your pain but this whole story has me dying.. you make it sound like he's slowly ruining your life

hahahaha i'll admit it.  sometimes i let the little things get to me, and this really is getting to me.

we've (my coworkers and i) complained to building management about it so they put up signs in the bathroom and inside each stall that say something like "please refrain from using excessive amounts of paper in the toilets as it can create plumbing issues" or something to that effect.  Still the Double *#% Gasket Bandit continues.  My buddy took it a step further and left a very unprofessional message taped to the bathroom mirror that said something like "Hey you inconsiderate bleepety bleep.  How about you learn some bleepin manners and not bleep it up for the rest of us".  Still nothing.  I am full convinced that this dude is doing it just cause he knows it upsets the rest of us on the floor.  Thats why I have to resort to street justice once I find out who it is.  I'm pretty sure that dude will stop once he gets to taste his own doo doo. 
  

 

[dgk3188]

this makes me think of that episode of "curb your enthusiasm"

 

[dgk3188]

this makes me think of that episode of "curb your enthusiasm"

 

[sgtpeppers12]

At any public bathroom couple layers of tp but make sure you clean up when you are done

 

[sgtpeppers12]

At any public bathroom couple layers of tp but make sure you clean up when you are done

 

[ryair max 1]

Originally Posted by EB4President

1. Will never take a number 2 on the same floor I work. Will always go up or down a level(sometimes 2 or 3 floors)

 I'm the same way. I interned in the House of Representatives over the summer and was like there is no way in hell I am bumping into any staffers from my office and they hear me dropping a deuce. I worked on the 7th floor and I would go to the 4th or 5th floor of office building I was in and use their bathrooms.