NT's "True" Hollywood Stories (athletes, too)...post up anything you got that's funny.

[ears1351]

My Freshman year of College ( I went to IU), while riding the bus,I see this tall dude sittin' across from me with a fitted and legit air force ones. I realize they were part of the chamber of fear collection and all that other stuff, so me being a huge sneakerhead at the time, I start lookin' at his shoes too hard. All of a sudden, he yells at me, "Dawg, what the F@c& are you lookin' at. I look up, and it's this fool Jordan Crawford (now shooting guard for the Wizards). I apologize tons of times and just tell him I'm a sneakerhead, and I was admiring his shoes. He saw I had on altitude 13's and we started talking a bit. Turns out he lived in the dorm across from me with Eric Gordon; he invites me over later that night, mad white girls in the room, drinks, and smoke . . .easily one of the best nights of my college career lol.
 

 

[gatzbygordon]

last year me and some homegirls were at the bar and one of em asked if any of us watched the office and i said yeah why...then she said cuz kevin is behind us, i walked over to him told him that it was  going to be my birthday at midnight, which it was, and he told me you couldnt wait 10 effin minutes 

 then he said aiight get over here man..cool *** dude.

 

[cj003]

Nothing great, but I met Anthony Randolph when he was on the Warriors. I was at this ****** club in Walnut Creek, literally like 25 people were there. Randolph is by himself roaming around w/ a bottle of goose. I rarely go up to celebs, but when I was in the patio area with my boys chilling he comes to lean on the railing right next to me. Like there is this big patio area w/ plenty of space and he comes and stands 2 feet from me and my boys sipping on his goose. I was really drunk and had nothing to say to the guy, but I was drunk so I thought it was a good idea to spark up a convo b/c he was standing right next to me. I say, "How's the team looking this year?" He says nothing just stares at me. There's like this awkward silence for like 10-15 seconds between him, me and my friends. He's still staring at me, not saying a word. I turn to my friends and say lets get a drink. I say, "Good luck this year I think the team will be dope." Put out my hand for a dap. Nothing, the guy still doesn't move. No expression. Nothing. My hand is in the air hanging hella awkward so, I pat the guy on the back as hard as possible and walk away.

I met Bill Burr at the laugh factory in LA. He did his set and killed it of course. Dude is my favorite stand-up comedian right now. I listen to his podcast every week. I go to the bathroom and theres a line in the hall way, and Bill is standing right next to me. I tell him I'm a huge fan and listen to the podcast weekly. He tells me he wasn't feeling the one he just did. And I'm like no it was great man, that I listened to it on the ride from AZ (where I go to school) earlier that day. That it kept me awake from laughing so hard. He then says "Thanks, what was your favorite part?" I completely froze and couldn't remember a single thing from the podcast. Mind you I had just listened to it a couple hours ago. I say, "uhhhhh the whole thing" He looks at me like 'ya this mfer don't listen to my ****' But says thanks. I got a pic w/ him and ducked out.

 

[smangalang]

My godmother used to smoke with biggie back in the day and my mom and aunt knew jay z back in the 90s
My dad wrote paper soldiers. The movie was about what he used to do. Kevin hart plays him and his girl and son are supposed to represent my moms and me
He also knows the roc a fella crew

PAPER SOLDIERS IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE MOVIES!!!

"THE ***** IS IN THE WINDOW!"

"The left cheek or the right cheek?"

 

[sonunox34]

Reporter for an NBA team, this is my second season. Met a bunch of dudes but these are the only semi-interesting stories...

Asked Artest what his favorite Biggie record was... it was the anniversary of his shooting, and I figured since Artest was from NYC and around the same era, he'd be familiar... he just paused and said "I don't really listen to rap like that" must have been trolling me.

Dirk Nowitzki jumped out and said "BOO" to one of our interns, who spilled nachos on their shirt and Dirk just laughed

Tom Thibodeau has the deepest voice you've ever heard, and really doesn't want to answer any questions, ever.

Was taking a photo for our Twitter of DeMarcus Cousins warming up at his morning shootaround... he turned to me and said "shut that shht off, son" so I did.

Rubio is a good guy who is genuinely nice.

Nothing great, but I met Anthony Randolph when he was on the Warriors. I was at this ****** club in Walnut Creek, literally like 25 people were there. Randolph is by himself roaming around w/ a bottle of goose. I rarely go up to celebs, but when I was in the patio area with my boys chilling he comes to lean on the railing right next to me. Like there is this big patio area w/ plenty of space and he comes and stands 2 feet from me and my boys sipping on his goose. I was really drunk and had nothing to say to the guy, but I was drunk so I thought it was a good idea to spark up a convo b/c he was standing right next to me. I say, "How's the team looking this year?" He says nothing just stares at me. There's like this awkward silence for like 10-15 seconds between him, me and my friends. He's still staring at me, not saying a word. I turn to my friends and say lets get a drink. I say, "Good luck this year I think the team will be dope." Put out my hand for a dap. Nothing, the guy still doesn't move. No expression. Nothing. My hand is in the air hanging hella awkward so, I pat the guy on the back as hard as possible and walk away.

LOL

Not a surprise. Guy has barely anything going on in his head.

 

[beh235]

Damn this thread is ill, I gotta come back

 

[beh235]

Yooooooo that Demarcus Cousins encounter tho...... My dude ain't playin

 

[216301baller]

dude i would be legitamately scared if i did something like that to terrell suggs

 

[yvespo3]

After the bucs vs falcons game I saw Aqib Talib at the airport, guess he came down to pick some stuff up since the pats played on thursday. We looked at each other and I gave him the head nod and dude just straight looked away, then I said thats why we traded your @#$ and he smirked.

 

[216301baller]

sheryl underwood bought me a drink on my 21st bday at this comedy club in miami
got a lapdance by black chyna
grabbed courtney cumz butt
met eddie george, sam jones, & helly other athletes at card show conventions
paul pierce played me on a autograph to go talk to a cavs cheerleader..I was 12 and had on celtics gear smh
lebron "shooed" my dad when he asked for a pic
Lebron broke his neck staring at my 6's and my boy told him kobe was better at ceader point summer of 2011
Met roddy at the currensy concert in dc past summer..took a pic with him..told him it was pretty cool he flowed over the gimme yours beat by AZ
stayed with Maurice Clarett at his uncles condo(friend of the family) in Columbus for the games against texas tech and penn state
Met the whole magic team before game 5 in Cleveland..Dwight howard signed my cousins sandals lmao & my boys ice creams
Michael Pietrus is a douche..I told JJ Redick he couldnt shoot the whole team started laughing
Met Robert Griffith when he played for the browns at a Cavs game..my dad told them they should be getting ready for the steelers game..they played the following day
met Mike Cameron when played for the Marlins..my cuz was a pitcher for the Marlins in the early 2000's

 

[Deleted member 38182]

 

this might be the longest sentence i never read

I gave up 3 lines in

 

[vanillagorilladx]

Saw Aziz Ansari after the Kanye West 'GOOD' Music showcase at SXSW. Dude was drunk as hell

 

[akajae]

When I was working in DTLA me and my coworker would hit up Wokcanos for happy hour. Anyway, Jalen Rose would always be there sippin on sangrias lol. We met these chicks for drinks and this dude Jalen Rose walks over to our table and hugs the chicks and gives us dap. The chicks go on to tell us that he hit on them a few weeks back and they agreed to meet him for drinks. They said when they arrived to the bar, Jalen Rose was with some asian chick. They come over to his table and dude is drunk as hell getting a handjob under the table


When I was a freshman in college I used to party at USC (had a couple athlete buddies who went there). This was during USC's glory days with the likes of Reggie Bush, Lendale White and co. We were at a party and all the football players mob in there like they own the place. One of our boys was drunk and must've bumped into Lendale White or something. Anyway, this dude Lendale White one pieced our boy and knocked him out cold. I grew up a few blocks from SC so we called some of our boys. Lendale White then came over and apologized for knocking out our boy


It was during this time that Natalie Nunn was going to USC. One of my boys smashed her

Spoiler: Warning: Spoiler!

We also used to kick it with Carole Rodriguez (Nick Young's girl)
Everyone was trying to get at her but she wasn't out there like that.

Spoiler: Warning: Spoiler!

 

[youngdoc]

Cousin's bachelor party in ATL (Onyx) - Ludacris had the section next to us and kept making it rain and was hogging all of the bad strippers including the one I wanted bad

Have run into lots of athletes in Vegas especially at the tables - Amare, Granger, Floyd Mayweather, Morris Twins, Domonique Wilkins. The 30 for 30 Broke makes sense - these dudes be gambling 10K+ a hand and make my $200 "big" hands feel puny

Another time in ATL was next to Jeezy at a light while my girl was driving. I told her to race him (he was in a Ferrari) - semi srs but she said no. He sped off crazy and then like a minute or two later we catch up to him and he's pulled over in the middle of Peachtree and surrounded by 3 or 4 cop cars and they're searching his vehicle

4 or 5 years ago at Love in DC. Tried to get at this bad broad and she stiff armed me. Minutes later I see her in VIP all hugged up on Darren Sharper.

 

[onewearz]

One of the funniest things on NT that I've read on NT, was dude who was playing beer-league softball in the BX and had an encounter w. Triple Seis from the Terror Squad. You would think dude was on one of the teams that was playing but no....he was the ump. Dude raised his mask while dusting off the plate and homie up at bat was

To this day

That was me

That **** was crazy cause while he's calling balls and strikes I kinda recognized his voice. When he took off his mask and I seen his face We were dying

Cool dude though, after the game he had a couple brews and told us about the fall of terror squad

 

[DCAllAfrican]

I made Deron Derozan's and his girl's Platinum Debit Card. His girl sounded sexy as hell when I had to call them.

Who is that?

 

[youngdoc]

The softball story reminded me of this

http://deadspin.com/5929497/terrell...to-become-a-softball-ringer?tag=Terrell-Owens

A friend was on the team. Oh how the mighty have fallen

"On Thursday, Owens made his debut for the Flashes of the Santa Monica Recreational League. You might have caught wind of this on Deadspin, but here's the inside story from a teammate who hasn't had the requisite amount of time to hate his guts.

• T.O. -- with glove, new cleats and two bats in tow -- rolled in 10 minutes before gametime and took the field without any warmup tosses or stretching. Most 38-year-old softball players in America risk a double hamstring explosion by attempting this same feat.

• Owens was quiet, but not standoffish, with teammates. When asked if he was going to play in the NFL this season, he responded, "That's the plan." He chuckled later when a teammate said, "Nice hit, rookie."

• Batting cleanup, Owens popped out to left in his first at-bat. A crowd of approximately 20 people were watching the game, rivaling the attendance of your typical Allen Wranglers contest. He doubled the next two times up. He slid awkwardly into second base on one of the hits, but seemed fine.

• Owens moves extremely well and had a cannon arm in left field, which he enjoyed showing off (shocker). He has an awkward right-handed swing, but it's not nearly as ugly as had been explained on Deadspin. "You really see the difference between somebody who's a world-class athlete and someone who just plays softball," Rhino said.

• After the game (a blowout win for the Flashes), Owens posed for pictures with players on the opposing team. A teammate told him he'd be in touch. Owens replied, "Cool" and walked off, taking 1,078 career receptions (and two doubles) with him.

"It's very surreal, you know?" Rhino said. "I guess it's a wait-and-see. Is he really going to keep playing with us? He's a great player, he can be an asset, but can he take the attention he gets coming out to play recreational softball?"

Something tells us Owens will take all the attention he can get. Especially right now. "

 

[DCAllAfrican]

My godmother used to smoke with biggie back in the day and my mom and aunt knew jay z back in the 90s
My dad wrote paper soldiers. The movie was about what he used to do. Kevin hart plays him and his girl and son are supposed to represent my moms and me
He also knows the roc a fella crew

 

[3miyasaki3]

My brother worked for Skullcandy so I've got to chill with all of their NBA crew. KD actually sent a video to my little bro and me wishing us good luck at state basketball. Super nice guy.

Deron Williams is a cool dude too. I told him a story about him giving me one of his shoes after a summer league game and me getting them stolen and he laughed and then gave me a signed jersey.

Andre Iguodala is definitely the coolest dude though. He cooked us wings, let me drive his whip, and just is the most down to earth dude. I actually have a candid video of me asking him about the picture he has with the niketalk shirt. He said he doesn't have a username but that he gets on the website.

Met Larry Bird when I was in junior high and he was with the pacers. Asked him for his autograph and he asked what I would do for it...kinda awkward dude.

 

[mplsdunk]

riff raff stayed at my house a few weeks back. not that uncommon since i live with his brother. we shot a video in my kitchen but he didn't drop it yet. he said it will be a few months.

 

[guttagetsbusy]

My Freshman year of College ( I went to IU), while riding the bus,I see this tall dude sittin' across from me with a fitted and legit air force ones. I realize they were part of the chamber of fear collection and all that other stuff, so me being a huge sneakerhead at the time, I start lookin' at his shoes too hard. All of a sudden, he yells at me, "Dawg, what the F@c& are you lookin' at. I look up, and it's this fool Jordan Crawford (now shooting guard for the Wizards). I apologize tons of times and just tell him I'm a sneakerhead, and I was admiring his shoes.
 

You soft cuh.

 

[cocotaso1]

My Freshman year of College ( I went to IU), while riding the bus,I see this tall dude sittin' across from me with a fitted and legit air force ones. I realize they were part of the chamber of fear collection and all that other stuff, so me being a huge sneakerhead at the time, I start lookin' at his shoes too hard. All of a sudden, he yells at me, "Dawg, what the F@c& are you lookin' at. I look up, and it's this fool Jordan Crawford (now shooting guard for the Wizards). I apologize tons of times and just tell him I'm a sneakerhead, and I was admiring his shoes.
 

You soft cuh.

as baby ****.

 

[00david00]

When I was working in DTLA me and my coworker would hit up Wokcanos for happy hour. Anyway, Jalen Rose would always be there sippin on sangrias lol. We met these chicks for drinks and this dude Jalen Rose walks over to our table and hugs the chicks and gives us dap. The chicks go on to tell us that he hit on them a few weeks back and they agreed to meet him for drinks. They said when they arrived to the bar, Jalen Rose was with some asian chick. They come over to his table and dude is drunk as hell getting a handjob under the table


When I was a freshman in college I used to party at USC (had a couple athlete buddies who went there). This was during USC's glory days with the likes of Reggie Bush, Lendale White and co. We were at a party and all the football players mob in there like they own the place. One of our boys was drunk and must've bumped into Lendale White or something. Anyway, this dude Lendale White one pieced our boy and knocked him out cold. I grew up a few blocks from SC so we called some of our boys. Lendale White then came over and apologized for knocking out our boy


It was during this time that Natalie Nunn was going to USC. One of my boys smashed her

Spoiler: Warning: Spoiler!

We also used to kick it with Carole Rodriguez (Nick Young's girl)
Everyone was trying to get at her but she wasn't out there like that.

Spoiler: Warning: Spoiler!

yo thats hilarious

I've seen that chick numerous times on campus before

even met her at a olympic reception for usc athletes at the london olympics

 

[destination kicks]

Met David Banner at Kith back in March. I thought it was Justin Tuck until he started talking. Took some pics and chatted for a minute.

 

[christhedolphin]

Me and my homie were walkin through Tysons Corner on a regular *** saturday afternoon. We were walkin by the food court when I see these three tall *** dudes in sweats and ****.  In my head I'm like 

 because you just don't three tall *** ****** roaming together like that.  Then i realize dude in the middle was Caron Butler. They start walking in our direction ,  so i'm like to my boy "yo thats Caron Butler." He hits me with the 

 Now knowing how I don't know this ***** regardless of the fact that he's famous, I wasn't tryna show out or do too much. So I just play it cool and go "what's good mr. butler" and he responds "chillin".  After we pass my boy proceeds to clown me for hours for calling him 'mr butler' . 

 He was cool tho