Stupid things adults used to tell you as a child

[imrichboy]

if i sleep more, and take naps i will get taller. If you let newborns sleep on the side they will a nice round shape head. instead of flat back head if youwere to sleep on you're back.

 

[minotauro nogueira]

"if you cry. you're face will get stuck crying forever."- i refused to listen n keep crying lol.

 

[mateen cleaves]

Originally Posted by Cobra Kai

Jacking off will make you go blind.... Although I do wear glasses.

 

[bad n fluenz]

The whole "It hurts me more than it hurts you"

Masterbating will make me go blind

Playing with my golf balls while doing some random thing will make them fall off

looking at Porn will send me to hell

I swear to god for the longest time i thought this was true!!! - my dad told me you can catch HIV/AIDS even if you and the other person do not have it. I'mlike "wait a minute, if i don't have aids and they don't have aids and we do it like they do it on the discovery channel I can get aids?????"and he said yes. SMH I believed that for the longest time ever! I lost my virginity at 20. I called up the AIDS hotline to see if it were true SMH at myself

eating chicken and nothing but chicken will make me grow a gizzard like a chicken.

staying up late at night will wake up zombies to come get me. the night of XMAS my parents used to put in Night of the Living Dead in the VCR so I wouldn'trampage on the presents. IT WORKED TOO.

I got caught with my dads porn once watching it on tv he told me that if I ever steal his porn again he was going to tie me up and drop me off in that bigol' graveyard in Buffalo.

Wearing a hat will make me go bald

getting my ears pierced will turn me gay ( sry dad ur genetics did that, look at the other boys with your last name, there's 7 of us Leith boys, 4 aregay/bi , 3 are str8.

the smallest twitch hurts the least amount when used to discipline me with, %##+# it was the BIGGEST ones that hurt the least they had a dull feeling and thelil ones had the stinging feeling

eating nothing but cereal will make me look like i just came from a concentration camp.

Drinking alcohol will make me super sick and turn into a crazy person and throw up all over like that fat guy in the pie eating contest from the movie"Stand By Me"

loads of others can't think of them right now

 

[im self abs0rbed]

my mom used to tell me the devil was gonna come rip my tongue out one night, all the time when i was a lad

i had a big mouth, talked a lot & talked back a lot
but never anything CRAZY, i didn't curse my mom out or anything .. but i guess she was tired of my voice

pretty f***ed up if you ask me

& she used to tell me they charged you to go into certain stores, the one's with moderately expensive-expensive merchandise of course

i believed her & didn't ask to go into those stores for mad years

then i realized it was lies when i was old enough to know they can't charge you to step foot in hallmark

 

[solematic j21]

you better be good so santa clause can give you lots of presents.
leave your tooth under your pillow and the tooth fairy will give you money.

 

[dendanskesimon]

everything already in here lol

but my Chemistry HONORS teacher swore on her life that any negative number multiplied by an even positive number became positive. Shes obv wrong, and stillhealthy as ever, still teaching people this foolishness

 

[mister916]

Originally Posted by Nktran001

Try being Asian, you get tons of funny/weird things being told to you as a child.

I can't think of any right now but there were many indeed.

 

[ev209]

santa claus

 

[khalfani]

Originally Posted by SlamCity

Originally Posted by pr1nts

if i made a funny face it would get stuck like that

I got this all tie time

I think I heard this one at least 10 times a day when I was growing up lol

 

[jayhood23]

My sisters used to tell me that if I swallowed a watermelon seed a tree would grow out of me, and that if you play with your belly button by digging in it youwould die

 

[trueshotaura]

Santa, God, Jesus and co.

 

[vendetta]

Safe from the A-bomb?

 

[roll 22]

Eating Carrots are good for your eyes!

 

[trillipinotrapstar]

Eating black-eyed peas on New Year's day will give you good luck.

I hate eating those.

 

[vendetta]

Originally Posted by Roll 22

Eating Carrots are good for your eyes!

That's actually true lol. Though prolly not to the degree they told you.

 

[dom90]

Originally Posted by Roll 22

Eating Carrots are good for your eyes!

i was told this.
i now wear contacts

 

[ku jhawx]

If I play too much video games I would get "Videoitis" and get bumps and blisters and my hands would start peeling off...my dad even said "Yeah,there was this kid on Oprah the other day in a wheelchair..he had Videoitis."

 

[juice2352]

Lol at the baby bottle stories...and the flinstones vitamins were

 

[seventh letter]

Originally Posted by Vendetta

Safe from the A-bomb?

, never seen that one

 

[habib77fm]

Originally Posted by Cobra Kai

Jacking off will make you go blind.... Although I do wear glasses.

 

[besthandsindm]

If you keep crying you'll run out of tears and have no more for the rest of life.

 

[abominalsnowman]

I was told if you swallowed watermelon seeds they would they would grow in your belly!

 

[ii jovo ii]

if i drank coffee at a young age i would grow a tail.. i remember one day i took one sip and then they kept on telling me i was going to grow i tail i ran tothe bathroom locked myself in there and just cried..

 

[selectaclutchstar]

Originally Posted by KanyeWestJayZ4life

Dad: Ill give you something to cry about.
Me: **%$@ im already cryin (you never said it out load though)

I thought I was the only one who thought that!!! Even at what ever age that was that you cried, your logic was on point.

I was told if you made a face at someone for a long time, it was gonna stay that way permanently.
Your eyes being crossed if you cross them too much.
Too much fapping will make you go blind.