Whats the most Simpish thing you've ever witnessed

[whyhellothere]

Originally Posted by k3stacks

Well I once intertwined fingers with a girl while she was topping me off. I think thats considered simpish no?

 

[witnessmycalm21]

Originally Posted by Dunk These

iight yall.. after reading all of this, i HAVE to post this one.

this is about my boy.. a very good friend since middle school.

he gets with this chick from school but she has crazy baby daddy issues.. he proceeds knowing this too.

after about a month, he comes at me with his problems on some super sad tip.. obviously, girl cheats on my homie for her baby daddy. he is devastated and i tell him "dude, just let her go, no matter what, BD is always gonna be around.. dead that beezy." he comes back at me with the "its so hard bc i love her.." i hit him back with the

 but i keep hearing him out.

this dude has talked to ALL of our friends, even homegirls too and we all tell him that she aint the one, what she's doin to him is F'd up and to have more respect for himself..

fast forward to this past month.. she starts flakin out on dates w/ him, not getting back to his texts and calls. at this point, he's desperate to win her over. well, what do you know? the garden tool has been chillin with BD this whole time. after a few days of no call/no text, this herb i call my friend goes with his instincts and drives by BDs pad and guess what, her car is there!!

to make a long story short, she finally comes clean with my homie and tells him SHE GOT PREGNANT again by BD but she got an abortion and that "she's done" with baby daddy..

and to no one's surprise.. THE HOMIE GETS BACK WITH HER!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dude is a lost cause ...

651akathePaul wrote:

---

I remember one time having a sleep over when I was in the 4th or 5th grade and one of my friends told me his sister told him that a guy she really liked told her how beautiful her eyes were and how she ate it up.

Next schoold day on the bus I remember trying find one of the few empty seats because her stop was right after mine, hoping she sat next to me. She did, and I mustered up the courage to look at her straight faced to tell her "Sarah, you have beautiful eyes." Never really remember much after that with her 

damnitzdom wrote:

---

this was on my homegirls tumblr

"Welp... "

Did dude tell himself that his lil gatorade line was cute? 

 

[0cks]

Originally Posted by whyhellothere

Originally Posted by k3stacks

Well I once intertwined fingers with a girl while she was topping me off. I think thats considered simpish no?

They were "bonding" 

 

[airthompson]

Funny story, TRUE story!

So I messed with this chick in 11th grade. She was sub par lol, but her body was the banging. I nvr burn bridges with girls, because you never know when you may need them . . . or to borrow there bodies, ha. FF>> to earlier this year. I go to her crib mess around with her, and her boyfriend comes (I didnt know she had one) and proceeds to be like whats up man? Remember me? I was with this dudes girl ALONE.

Now, I dont know if that makes him a simp, or dumb but I had to share that.

 

[Sir San Diego]

Air Thompson you just reminded me of a high school adventure I once had.

I was messing with this girl on the track team and at that time my car was wrecked and getting some body work done. She was supposed to give me a ride home but insisted that we stop at her house. I figured she was finally gonna let me smash so I didn't argue with her. We get to her house, started messing around a little and she jumps out of bed, looks out the window and says her boyfriend is out there. Keep in mind, she would pull @%+* like this all the time when we were alone at her house, so much so that I was getting tired of messing with her because she was a tease. I mean this chick would get naked and all that but not let me hit...

So I give her the

look, throw her back on the bed and proceed to suck on her nipples. Then she pushes me off on some serious @%+* and starts getting dressed. I took that as my cue and got dressed as well. I asked her what we're gonna say and this chick tells me to go to her back yard and hands me two basketballs. I'm thinking +$$%+ really? You think you're gonna have me standing out here all night while you're in there with this dude smashing or what have you? But not having much choice at the time I went to see what kind of foolishness was going to follow. I'm leaving out that her man was in college (a loser) so I'm expecting this dude to be bout that life for some reason.

I'm out there for a few minutes and this chick comes out to the backyard and says "good you got the basketballs are you ready?" I'm looking like ready for what? Her boyfriend is looking at me like he's already not buying it and she's laughing. She explains to this dude that we are doing a group project for physics and that I needed to take the balls home to do some of the work. This dumb +*@ buys it and asks her if she's ready to go. Here's the simp part, she tells this dummy that I need a ride home and he offers to take me. So here I am in the front of his El Camino, sitting on the bench seat between him and her and she's slyly rubbing my side while the basketballs are under my feet, giggling like an idiot. Talk about an uncomfortable ride. As soon as I got to my house I jump out, chuck homie the deuce and kick both basketballs high in the sky and start dying laughing...

Never got to smash and ended up making the chick cry later on. I'm surprised I forgot about that until now...

 

[persiafly]

We're posted up one day outside the student center in college, and we see this dude that we play ball with standing on the other side of the courtyard with his girl. They started kissing and after a second the dude raised his leg. Like the chick in the pic below on the right. Had never seen a man do that before.

 

[k3stacks]

Originally Posted by PersiaFly

We're posted up one day outside the student center in college, and we see this dude that we play ball with standing on the other side of the courtyard with his girl. They started kissing and after a second the dude raised his leg. Like the chick in the pic below on the right. Had never seen a man do that before.

LOL smh

 

[truthgetsbusy]

• I was at the mall and seen a chick tell a dude what to buy for himself.  Dude was about to buy him some Kobe's and she said no gets these pointing to the John Wall zig zags. Then he said " I don't want no john wall kicks" and her eyes lit up and she said "John Wall is sexy.  You better get those".  Then he bought them
• I got neck from a chick and she swallowed.  We leave my dorm and walking down the hall see her boyfriend and his friends.  She says "gimme a kiss" on purpose and tongues him down.
  
  
• My boy bought a random chick a drink at the bar and walked away. He didn't spit any game and she didn't even say thanks...
  
   sad
• I seen a Marine get told by his wife that "you better buy me that Nintendo Wii or I might have to find other things to do when you leave next week" .  She was bad too.  And he bought it too.

 

[capricorn1229]

Originally Posted by PersiaFly

We're posted up one day outside the student center in college, and we see this dude that we play ball with standing on the other side of the courtyard with his girl. They started kissing and after a second the dude raised his leg. Like the chick in the pic below on the right. Had never seen a man do that before.

 

[badboyf0life420]

Originally Posted by TruthGetsBusy

• I got neck from a chick and she swallowed.  We leave my dorm and walking down the hall see her boyfriend and his friends.  She says "gimme a kiss" on purpose and tongues him down.
  
  

RUTHLESS!

 

[look like jesus]

Originally Posted by Carmelo Anothny

Originally Posted by JordansonDeck

2 stories. Both involving my ex roomate (who was a chick)

1. She had this SIMP ex bf. I mean dude used to loan her like 2k a month so she could be about that life like her friends. So we move into our spot and her room can fit a SMALL TV stand. Like no wider than 2 feet. this B buys a 6 foot dresser and we both tell her it will not fit. like no chance. she tells dude. I WANT IT PUT TOGETHER NOW AND I WILL THEN SEE IF IT FITS. this MF puts it together like a 4 hour job no help. and of course it doesn't fit. now keep in mind dude worked from 4-8 putting it together. She sees it doesn't fit gets mad at him and then yells. TAKE IT THE F APART AND GET IT BACK TO THE STORE AND GET A SMALLER ONE NOW!. Dude had like a hour. with no help. she was fixing her eyebrows. he rushed to get there and they were closed. lmao. Dude apologized up the %%+ and then bought her a fendi wallet the next day. SIMP

2. Same chick starts cheating on said boyfriend. With this black dude who's swag was on like 3 trillion. Dude straight told me. " im just hittin this cause i can" any way shes like in love with dude. Flew him from the east coast to LA 3 times in a month. she would tell the BF she was busy with work but would be getting the mamba all day. long story shory dude tells her he won't commit to her cause he has a LIVE IN GIRLFRIEND back in ny. This B goes and starts baking cookies to cure depression and then calls her bf who races over to console her from what she said was "difficult days at work" when earlier that afternoon dude was wearing her out in the shower. The bf is holding her and saying its gonna be ok. Then goes and gets her a 900$ snowboard. Which she then uses to meet up with other dude on a "girls trip".

Cold game. Colder %!%+%.

Goodnight. I'm out.
  

 

[capricorn1229]

Originally Posted by Hazeleyed Honey

 But, simping can also be done by women. I know some girls that would simp for the guy and he would just take advantage of it.

I've seen't it and have been disgusted. Chasing some man. Isn't natural. *%!%$@# buying concert tickets, kicks, clothes, games etc. 

 

[|A-Man|]

Originally Posted by Capricorn1229

Originally Posted by Hazeleyed Honey

 But, simping can also be done by women. I know some girls that would simp for the guy and he would just take advantage of it.

I've seen't it and have been disgusted. Chasing some man. Isn't natural. *%!%$@# buying concert tickets, kicks, clothes, games etc.

It is. Just wait until the day you get hooked on the ****.

 

[ill steelo]

Originally Posted by TruthGetsBusy

• I was at the mall and seen a chick tell a dude what to buy for himself.  Dude was about to buy him some Kobe's and she said no gets these pointing to the John Wall zig zags. Then he said " I don't want no john wall kicks" and her eyes lit up and she said "John Wall is sexy.  You better get those".  Then he bought them
• I got neck from a chick and she swallowed.  We leave my dorm and walking down the hall see her boyfriend and his friends.  She says "gimme a kiss" on purpose and tongues him down.
  
  
• My boy bought a random chick a drink at the bar and walked away. He didn't spit any game and she didn't even say thanks...
  
   sad
• I seen a Marine get told by his wife that "you better buy me that Nintendo Wii or I might have to find other things to do when you leave next week" .  She was bad too.  And he bought it too.

 

 

[j4ck]

WitnessMyCalm21 wrote:

damnitzdom wrote:

---

this was on my homegirls tumblr

Did dude tell himself that his lil gatorade line was cute? 

 $*#@ doesn't even make sense

 

[teamjordan79]

Originally Posted by badboyf0life420

Originally Posted by TruthGetsBusy

• I got neck from a chick and she swallowed.  We leave my dorm and walking down the hall see her boyfriend and his friends.  She says "gimme a kiss" on purpose and tongues him down.
  
  

 

[connoristhatdude]

Originally Posted by Dunk These

iight yall.. after reading all of this, i HAVE to post this one.

this is about my boy.. a very good friend since middle school.

he gets with this chick from school but she has crazy baby daddy issues.. he proceeds knowing this too.

after about a month, he comes at me with his problems on some super sad tip.. obviously, girl cheats on my homie for her baby daddy. he is devastated and i tell him "dude, just let her go, no matter what, BD is always gonna be around.. dead that beezy." he comes back at me with the "its so hard bc i love her.." i hit him back with the

 but i keep hearing him out.

this dude has talked to ALL of our friends, even homegirls too and we all tell him that she aint the one, what she's doin to him is F'd up and to have more respect for himself..

fast forward to this past month.. she starts flakin out on dates w/ him, not getting back to his texts and calls. at this point, he's desperate to win her over. well, what do you know? the garden tool has been chillin with BD this whole time. after a few days of no call/no text, this herb i call my friend goes with his instincts and drives by BDs pad and guess what, her car is there!!

to make a long story short, she finally comes clean with my homie and tells him SHE GOT PREGNANT again by BD but she got an abortion and that "she's done" with baby daddy..

and to no one's surprise.. THE HOMIE GETS BACK WITH HER!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[rolaholic]

Originally Posted by PersiaFly

We're posted up one day outside the student center in college, and we see this dude that we play ball with standing on the other side of the courtyard with his girl. They started kissing and after a second the dude raised his leg. Like the chick in the pic below on the right. Had never seen a man do that before.

 

[smedroc]

Originally Posted by sloanboy

Originally Posted by dipped in butter

Originally Posted by Hazeleyed Honey

I had an ex friend who would get guys to simp hard for her. They would buy her all kinds of stuff and they would not get anything in return. But, simping can also be done by women. I know some girls that would simp for the guy and he would just take advantage of it.

Damb...Male gold diggers

 

Nah those are called pimps brah......

 

[capricorn1229]

Originally Posted by sloanboy

Originally Posted by dipped in butter

Originally Posted by Hazeleyed Honey

I had an ex friend who would get guys to simp hard for her. They would buy her all kinds of stuff and they would not get anything in return. But, simping can also be done by women. I know some girls that would simp for the guy and he would just take advantage of it.

Damb...Male gold diggers

 

Nah those are called pimps brah......

but when a female does it she can't hold that title. Now why is that? Is it because the P is just too powerful and it really would make things unfair?

 

[put em up]

Originally Posted by Brolic Scholar

but the girl I brought wanted to be ran through by EVERYONE. I wudn't ee'm mad. When we're all getting ready to dip, we call out this one dude's name and he's under the covers munching box.

That was the last time I spoke to him since I figured he wanted to taste everyone's pipe on the low. He had to nerve to try and justify it by saying "she likes me better than all of you."

He got clowned on the spot.

  

funniest line in this thread.

 

[teamjordan79]

Originally Posted by Capricorn1229

Originally Posted by sloanboy

Originally Posted by dipped in butter



Damb...Male gold diggers

 

Nah those are called pimps brah......

but when a female does it she can't hold that title. Now why is that? Is it because the P is just too powerful and it really would make things unfair?

well men and women are inherently different

 

[whyhellothere]

Originally Posted by TeamJordan79

Originally Posted by badboyf0life420

Originally Posted by TruthGetsBusy

• I got neck from a chick and she swallowed.  We leave my dorm and walking down the hall see her boyfriend and his friends.  She says "gimme a kiss" on purpose and tongues him down.
  
  

 

[storm2006]

[h1][/h1]

[h1]Ticker: Ex-Lion Roy Williams suing to get his engagement ring back[/h1]
Dallas Cowboys receiver Roy Williams just wants his ring back. Not a Super Bowl ring of course (ha!), but his engagement ring.

According to a story from OAOnline.com, the former Lion filed a lawsuit last week asking for the ring he offered to former Miss Texas USA Brooke Daniels. The rock is reportedly valued at $76,000.

Williams apparently mailed the ring to Daniels along with a recorded marriage proposal. He also included $5,000 for school and dental bills and a baseball for her brother. She rejected the proposal and has not returned the ring.

Williams and Daniels dated for nearly a year.

Michael Daniels, Brooke's father and a co-defendant in the lawsuit, has said he has possession of the ring and plans to return it to avoid further legal issues.

An injunction hearing is set for Friday in Odessa, Texas.

Link

Couldn't wait to see her, though? And threw in cash? And she rejected him? Ls on Ls on Ls

 

[that dude173]

Originally Posted by Storm2006


[h1][/h1]

[h1]Ticker: Ex-Lion Roy Williams suing to get his engagement ring back[/h1]
Dallas Cowboys receiver Roy Williams just wants his ring back. Not a Super Bowl ring of course (ha!), but his engagement ring.

According to a story from OAOnline.com, the former Lion filed a lawsuit last week asking for the ring he offered to former Miss Texas USA Brooke Daniels. The rock is reportedly valued at $76,000.

Williams apparently mailed the ring to Daniels along with a recorded marriage proposal. He also included $5,000 for school and dental bills and a baseball for her brother. She rejected the proposal and has not returned the ring.

Williams and Daniels dated for nearly a year.

Michael Daniels, Brooke's father and a co-defendant in the lawsuit, has said he has possession of the ring and plans to return it to avoid further legal issues.

An injunction hearing is set for Friday in Odessa, Texas.

Link

Couldn't wait to see her, though? And threw in cash? And she rejected him? Ls on Ls on Ls



then again he does play for the Cowboys.......