Whats the most Simpish thing you've ever witnessed

[sloanboy]

Originally Posted by MPLSdunk

i used to work at this lounge.  place was always OD wild on new years.  3 floors open bar on all floors 100 dollar cover, you know the deal.  come about 3am i see this chick with her dude.  dude is pretty sober and she's wild drunk.  i guess she was mad for whatever reason.  she rocked him in the head at least 5 times and smashed his head into a glass window outside the bar a grip of times.  dude was legit getting his %%* kicked by a female. 

me and a bartender and watching like is this real?

  anyways dude getting his %%* kicked by his chick is telling her he's gonna buy her all this stuff if she just quits rocking him.

she quit...

wow

 

[sloanboy]

Originally Posted by MPLSdunk

i used to work at this lounge.  place was always OD wild on new years.  3 floors open bar on all floors 100 dollar cover, you know the deal.  come about 3am i see this chick with her dude.  dude is pretty sober and she's wild drunk.  i guess she was mad for whatever reason.  she rocked him in the head at least 5 times and smashed his head into a glass window outside the bar a grip of times.  dude was legit getting his %%* kicked by a female. 

me and a bartender and watching like is this real?

  anyways dude getting his %%* kicked by his chick is telling her he's gonna buy her all this stuff if she just quits rocking him.

she quit...

wow

 

[ill steelo]

my boy from HS bought this chick a gang of stuff for valentines day. I'm talking life size teddy bear, tons of balloons, and candy etc. And she barely even knew him. All she got him was a bag of skittles.

 

[omgitswes]

Originally Posted by JordansonDeck

2 stories. Both involving my ex roomate (who was a chick)

1. She had this SIMP ex bf. I mean dude used to loan her like 2k a month so she could be about that life like her friends. So we move into our spot and her room can fit a SMALL TV stand. Like no wider than 2 feet. this B buys a 6 foot dresser and we both tell her it will not fit. like no chance. she tells dude. I WANT IT PUT TOGETHER NOW AND I WILL THEN SEE IF IT FITS. this MF puts it together like a 4 hour job no help. and of course it doesn't fit. now keep in mind dude worked from 4-8 putting it together. She sees it doesn't fit gets mad at him and then yells. TAKE IT THE F APART AND GET IT BACK TO THE STORE AND GET A SMALLER ONE NOW!. Dude had like a hour. with no help. she was fixing her eyebrows. he rushed to get there and they were closed. lmao. Dude apologized up the %%+ and then bought her a fendi wallet the next day. SIMP

2. Same chick starts cheating on said boyfriend. With this black dude who's swag was on like 3 trillion. Dude straight told me. " im just hittin this cause i can" any way shes like in love with dude. Flew him from the east coast to LA 3 times in a month. she would tell the BF she was busy with work but would be getting the mamba all day. long story shory dude tells her he won't commit to her cause he has a LIVE IN GIRLFRIEND back in ny. This B goes and starts baking cookies to cure depression and then calls her bf who races over to console her from what she said was "difficult days at work" when earlier that afternoon dude was wearing her out in the shower. The bf is holding her and saying its gonna be ok. Then goes and gets her a 900$ snowboard. Which she then uses to meet up with other dude on a "girls trip".

Cold game. Colder %!%+%.

I would never drop that much money on a girl, but that's besides the point. You can't really trust some of these, just when you think you  have a good one she might pull something like that. It's sad man
  

 

[omgitswes]

Originally Posted by JordansonDeck

2 stories. Both involving my ex roomate (who was a chick)

1. She had this SIMP ex bf. I mean dude used to loan her like 2k a month so she could be about that life like her friends. So we move into our spot and her room can fit a SMALL TV stand. Like no wider than 2 feet. this B buys a 6 foot dresser and we both tell her it will not fit. like no chance. she tells dude. I WANT IT PUT TOGETHER NOW AND I WILL THEN SEE IF IT FITS. this MF puts it together like a 4 hour job no help. and of course it doesn't fit. now keep in mind dude worked from 4-8 putting it together. She sees it doesn't fit gets mad at him and then yells. TAKE IT THE F APART AND GET IT BACK TO THE STORE AND GET A SMALLER ONE NOW!. Dude had like a hour. with no help. she was fixing her eyebrows. he rushed to get there and they were closed. lmao. Dude apologized up the %%+ and then bought her a fendi wallet the next day. SIMP

2. Same chick starts cheating on said boyfriend. With this black dude who's swag was on like 3 trillion. Dude straight told me. " im just hittin this cause i can" any way shes like in love with dude. Flew him from the east coast to LA 3 times in a month. she would tell the BF she was busy with work but would be getting the mamba all day. long story shory dude tells her he won't commit to her cause he has a LIVE IN GIRLFRIEND back in ny. This B goes and starts baking cookies to cure depression and then calls her bf who races over to console her from what she said was "difficult days at work" when earlier that afternoon dude was wearing her out in the shower. The bf is holding her and saying its gonna be ok. Then goes and gets her a 900$ snowboard. Which she then uses to meet up with other dude on a "girls trip".

Cold game. Colder %!%+%.

I would never drop that much money on a girl, but that's besides the point. You can't really trust some of these, just when you think you  have a good one she might pull something like that. It's sad man
  

 

[ill steelo]

my boy from HS bought this chick a gang of stuff for valentines day. I'm talking life size teddy bear, tons of balloons, and candy etc. And she barely even knew him. All she got him was a bag of skittles.

 

[joe cool]

back in high school when I was in 10th grade I was in this 11th grade chemistry class. I remember this one dude who used to simp heavy for this one spanish mami in the class.

Son used to call her beautiful everyday, walk her to class, carry her bag, and in every conversation he would find someway to compliment her.  I thought it was od but I thought she was his girl.
a week or 2 later in walkin down the stairs and I see the spanish mami kissin some guy and its not my son from chem class. so I ask her whats up and shes like the guy is her boyfriend and they been goin out for like a month. I said i thought u was with my son from chem class and shes like nah hes just a good friend. I was like

. Any way my son continued to simp

Fast forward to valentines day, I see dude from chem class in the hallway and hes has this big bag with candy, a small teddy bear, and a balloon. Im thinkin he got himself a girl and left spanish mami alone. So i follow him cuz i wanna see if his new girl is

.  Son walks up to this class room and spanish mami is standing at the door with her man.  dude gives her the bag. Shes says "Aw thank you" and gives him a hug and kiss on the cheek. her man hits him with the

, daps him up and says "thanks". then dude walks away with the biggest smile on his face word to

i couldnt believe i had witnessed that. had me feelin like

. Son has grown alot since then and I doubt hes still simpin that hard, but everytime I see him, in the back of my mind i always remember that day

 

[joe cool]

back in high school when I was in 10th grade I was in this 11th grade chemistry class. I remember this one dude who used to simp heavy for this one spanish mami in the class.

Son used to call her beautiful everyday, walk her to class, carry her bag, and in every conversation he would find someway to compliment her.  I thought it was od but I thought she was his girl.
a week or 2 later in walkin down the stairs and I see the spanish mami kissin some guy and its not my son from chem class. so I ask her whats up and shes like the guy is her boyfriend and they been goin out for like a month. I said i thought u was with my son from chem class and shes like nah hes just a good friend. I was like

. Any way my son continued to simp

Fast forward to valentines day, I see dude from chem class in the hallway and hes has this big bag with candy, a small teddy bear, and a balloon. Im thinkin he got himself a girl and left spanish mami alone. So i follow him cuz i wanna see if his new girl is

.  Son walks up to this class room and spanish mami is standing at the door with her man.  dude gives her the bag. Shes says "Aw thank you" and gives him a hug and kiss on the cheek. her man hits him with the

, daps him up and says "thanks". then dude walks away with the biggest smile on his face word to

i couldnt believe i had witnessed that. had me feelin like

. Son has grown alot since then and I doubt hes still simpin that hard, but everytime I see him, in the back of my mind i always remember that day

 

[sloanboy]

Originally Posted by omgitswes

Originally Posted by JordansonDeck

2 stories. Both involving my ex roomate (who was a chick)

1. She had this SIMP ex bf. I mean dude used to loan her like 2k a month so she could be about that life like her friends. So we move into our spot and her room can fit a SMALL TV stand. Like no wider than 2 feet. this B buys a 6 foot dresser and we both tell her it will not fit. like no chance. she tells dude. I WANT IT PUT TOGETHER NOW AND I WILL THEN SEE IF IT FITS. this MF puts it together like a 4 hour job no help. and of course it doesn't fit. now keep in mind dude worked from 4-8 putting it together. She sees it doesn't fit gets mad at him and then yells. TAKE IT THE F APART AND GET IT BACK TO THE STORE AND GET A SMALLER ONE NOW!. Dude had like a hour. with no help. she was fixing her eyebrows. he rushed to get there and they were closed. lmao. Dude apologized up the %%+ and then bought her a fendi wallet the next day. SIMP

2. Same chick starts cheating on said boyfriend. With this black dude who's swag was on like 3 trillion. Dude straight told me. " im just hittin this cause i can" any way shes like in love with dude. Flew him from the east coast to LA 3 times in a month. she would tell the BF she was busy with work but would be getting the mamba all day. long story shory dude tells her he won't commit to her cause he has a LIVE IN GIRLFRIEND back in ny. This B goes and starts baking cookies to cure depression and then calls her bf who races over to console her from what she said was "difficult days at work" when earlier that afternoon dude was wearing her out in the shower. The bf is holding her and saying its gonna be ok. Then goes and gets her a 900$ snowboard. Which she then uses to meet up with other dude on a "girls trip".

Cold game. Colder %!%+%.

I would never drop that much money on a girl, but that's besides the point. You can't really trust some of these, just when you think you  have a good one she might pull something like that. It's sad man
  

Foreal man and to keep it one hunnit i HATE being an a-hole to these broads but i know (from experience) Nice guys finish last............. so i gotta do what i gotta do

 

[sloanboy]

Originally Posted by omgitswes

Originally Posted by JordansonDeck

2 stories. Both involving my ex roomate (who was a chick)

1. She had this SIMP ex bf. I mean dude used to loan her like 2k a month so she could be about that life like her friends. So we move into our spot and her room can fit a SMALL TV stand. Like no wider than 2 feet. this B buys a 6 foot dresser and we both tell her it will not fit. like no chance. she tells dude. I WANT IT PUT TOGETHER NOW AND I WILL THEN SEE IF IT FITS. this MF puts it together like a 4 hour job no help. and of course it doesn't fit. now keep in mind dude worked from 4-8 putting it together. She sees it doesn't fit gets mad at him and then yells. TAKE IT THE F APART AND GET IT BACK TO THE STORE AND GET A SMALLER ONE NOW!. Dude had like a hour. with no help. she was fixing her eyebrows. he rushed to get there and they were closed. lmao. Dude apologized up the %%+ and then bought her a fendi wallet the next day. SIMP

2. Same chick starts cheating on said boyfriend. With this black dude who's swag was on like 3 trillion. Dude straight told me. " im just hittin this cause i can" any way shes like in love with dude. Flew him from the east coast to LA 3 times in a month. she would tell the BF she was busy with work but would be getting the mamba all day. long story shory dude tells her he won't commit to her cause he has a LIVE IN GIRLFRIEND back in ny. This B goes and starts baking cookies to cure depression and then calls her bf who races over to console her from what she said was "difficult days at work" when earlier that afternoon dude was wearing her out in the shower. The bf is holding her and saying its gonna be ok. Then goes and gets her a 900$ snowboard. Which she then uses to meet up with other dude on a "girls trip".

Cold game. Colder %!%+%.

I would never drop that much money on a girl, but that's besides the point. You can't really trust some of these, just when you think you  have a good one she might pull something like that. It's sad man
  

Foreal man and to keep it one hunnit i HATE being an a-hole to these broads but i know (from experience) Nice guys finish last............. so i gotta do what i gotta do

 

[sweettooth 17]

Originally Posted by Joe Cool

back in high school when I was in 10th grade I was in this 11th grade chemistry class. I remember this one dude who used to simp heavy for this one spanish mami in the class.

Son used to call her beautiful everyday, walk her to class, carry her bag, and in every conversation he would find someway to compliment her.  I thought it was od but I thought she was his girl.
a week or 2 later in walkin down the stairs and I see the spanish mami kissin some guy and its not my son from chem class. so I ask her whats up and shes like the guy is her boyfriend and they been goin out for like a month. I said i thought u was with my son from chem class and shes like nah hes just a good friend. I was like

. Any way my son continued to simp

Fast forward to valentines day, I see dude from chem class in the hallway and hes has this big bag with candy, a small teddy bear, and a balloon. Im thinkin he got himself a girl and left spanish mami alone. So i follow him cuz i wanna see if his new girl is

.  Son walks up to this class room and spanish mami is standing at the door with her man.  dude gives her the bag. Shes says "Aw thank you" and gives him a hug and kiss on the cheek. her man hits him with the

, daps him up and says "thanks". then dude walks away with the biggest smile on his face word to

i couldnt believe i had witnessed that. had me feelin like

. Son has grown alot since then and I doubt hes still simpin that hard, but everytime I see him, in the back of my mind i always remember that day

Oh my....

 

[sweettooth 17]

Originally Posted by Joe Cool

back in high school when I was in 10th grade I was in this 11th grade chemistry class. I remember this one dude who used to simp heavy for this one spanish mami in the class.

Son used to call her beautiful everyday, walk her to class, carry her bag, and in every conversation he would find someway to compliment her.  I thought it was od but I thought she was his girl.
a week or 2 later in walkin down the stairs and I see the spanish mami kissin some guy and its not my son from chem class. so I ask her whats up and shes like the guy is her boyfriend and they been goin out for like a month. I said i thought u was with my son from chem class and shes like nah hes just a good friend. I was like

. Any way my son continued to simp

Fast forward to valentines day, I see dude from chem class in the hallway and hes has this big bag with candy, a small teddy bear, and a balloon. Im thinkin he got himself a girl and left spanish mami alone. So i follow him cuz i wanna see if his new girl is

.  Son walks up to this class room and spanish mami is standing at the door with her man.  dude gives her the bag. Shes says "Aw thank you" and gives him a hug and kiss on the cheek. her man hits him with the

, daps him up and says "thanks". then dude walks away with the biggest smile on his face word to

i couldnt believe i had witnessed that. had me feelin like

. Son has grown alot since then and I doubt hes still simpin that hard, but everytime I see him, in the back of my mind i always remember that day

Oh my....

 

[connoristhatdude]

Reading posts like these get me so mad/sad. I mean partly for the simps, but mostly because of some of these grimey broads. Really makes me lose faith in these creatures we call women.

 

[connoristhatdude]

Reading posts like these get me so mad/sad. I mean partly for the simps, but mostly because of some of these grimey broads. Really makes me lose faith in these creatures we call women.

 

[scshift]

Originally Posted by Initial Lotus

I met this one dude who got 2390 on his SATs (out of 2400), got into ALL the UC's (got full rides to half of them), and got looks from Stanford for a swimming scholarship. Decided to go to a local state school after high school because his "girl" went there. After they both started college, she broke up with him.

I felt bad for the dude. Threw away full rides to college, to be with girl (who is prolly renegadin')...smh

Just goes to show you SAT scores and good colleges don't show true intelligence or common sense

 

[scshift]

Originally Posted by Initial Lotus

I met this one dude who got 2390 on his SATs (out of 2400), got into ALL the UC's (got full rides to half of them), and got looks from Stanford for a swimming scholarship. Decided to go to a local state school after high school because his "girl" went there. After they both started college, she broke up with him.

I felt bad for the dude. Threw away full rides to college, to be with girl (who is prolly renegadin')...smh

Just goes to show you SAT scores and good colleges don't show true intelligence or common sense

 

[je ne sais quoi]

Originally Posted by mco85

Back when NT invaded the JJB forum. There was this girl on the jjb forum who posted that she was hungry but she did not have any money at the moment, and this one NTer (I can't remember who) sent her some money through paypal to buy her dinner. I thought that was pretty simpish

Dude's SN is seaner or seener, he's a mod there now

.

 

[je ne sais quoi]

Originally Posted by mco85

Back when NT invaded the JJB forum. There was this girl on the jjb forum who posted that she was hungry but she did not have any money at the moment, and this one NTer (I can't remember who) sent her some money through paypal to buy her dinner. I thought that was pretty simpish

Dude's SN is seaner or seener, he's a mod there now

.

 

[sherwin100s]

Originally Posted by JordansonDeck

2 stories. Both involving my ex roomate (who was a chick)

1. She had this SIMP ex bf. I mean dude used to loan her like 2k a month so she could be about that life like her friends. So we move into our spot and her room can fit a SMALL TV stand. Like no wider than 2 feet. this B buys a 6 foot dresser and we both tell her it will not fit. like no chance. she tells dude. I WANT IT PUT TOGETHER NOW AND I WILL THEN SEE IF IT FITS. this MF puts it together like a 4 hour job no help. and of course it doesn't fit. now keep in mind dude worked from 4-8 putting it together. She sees it doesn't fit gets mad at him and then yells. TAKE IT THE F APART AND GET IT BACK TO THE STORE AND GET A SMALLER ONE NOW!. Dude had like a hour. with no help. she was fixing her eyebrows. he rushed to get there and they were closed. lmao. Dude apologized up the %%+ and then bought her a fendi wallet the next day. SIMP

2. Same chick starts cheating on said boyfriend. With this black dude who's swag was on like 3 trillion. Dude straight told me. " im just hittin this cause i can" any way shes like in love with dude. Flew him from the east coast to LA 3 times in a month. she would tell the BF she was busy with work but would be getting the mamba all day. long story shory dude tells her he won't commit to her cause he has a LIVE IN GIRLFRIEND back in ny. This B goes and starts baking cookies to cure depression and then calls her bf who races over to console her from what she said was "difficult days at work" when earlier that afternoon dude was wearing her out in the shower. The bf is holding her and saying its gonna be ok. Then goes and gets her a 900$ snowboard. Which she then uses to meet up with other dude on a "girls trip". Cold game. Colder %!%+%.

Disgusting smh

 

[sherwin100s]

Originally Posted by JordansonDeck

2 stories. Both involving my ex roomate (who was a chick)

1. She had this SIMP ex bf. I mean dude used to loan her like 2k a month so she could be about that life like her friends. So we move into our spot and her room can fit a SMALL TV stand. Like no wider than 2 feet. this B buys a 6 foot dresser and we both tell her it will not fit. like no chance. she tells dude. I WANT IT PUT TOGETHER NOW AND I WILL THEN SEE IF IT FITS. this MF puts it together like a 4 hour job no help. and of course it doesn't fit. now keep in mind dude worked from 4-8 putting it together. She sees it doesn't fit gets mad at him and then yells. TAKE IT THE F APART AND GET IT BACK TO THE STORE AND GET A SMALLER ONE NOW!. Dude had like a hour. with no help. she was fixing her eyebrows. he rushed to get there and they were closed. lmao. Dude apologized up the %%+ and then bought her a fendi wallet the next day. SIMP

2. Same chick starts cheating on said boyfriend. With this black dude who's swag was on like 3 trillion. Dude straight told me. " im just hittin this cause i can" any way shes like in love with dude. Flew him from the east coast to LA 3 times in a month. she would tell the BF she was busy with work but would be getting the mamba all day. long story shory dude tells her he won't commit to her cause he has a LIVE IN GIRLFRIEND back in ny. This B goes and starts baking cookies to cure depression and then calls her bf who races over to console her from what she said was "difficult days at work" when earlier that afternoon dude was wearing her out in the shower. The bf is holding her and saying its gonna be ok. Then goes and gets her a 900$ snowboard. Which she then uses to meet up with other dude on a "girls trip". Cold game. Colder %!%+%.

Disgusting smh

 

[disdiku8]

the story jumpmankb told makes me wanna vomit

 

[disdiku8]

the story jumpmankb told makes me wanna vomit

 

[still1rise]

My mom told that my pops gave up a full ride to UC Berkeley to go to CSU Eastbay for his girl at the time. He had to pay out of pocket for everything. She ended up finding someone else.

 What sad is he will bring her up to me from time to time when Im talking with him.

P rules everything around me.

 

[still1rise]

My mom told that my pops gave up a full ride to UC Berkeley to go to CSU Eastbay for his girl at the time. He had to pay out of pocket for everything. She ended up finding someone else.

 What sad is he will bring her up to me from time to time when Im talking with him.

P rules everything around me.

 

[whyhellothere]

Originally Posted by Sweettooth 17

Originally Posted by Joe Cool

back in high school when I was in 10th grade I was in this 11th grade chemistry class. I remember this one dude who used to simp heavy for this one spanish mami in the class.

Son used to call her beautiful everyday, walk her to class, carry her bag, and in every conversation he would find someway to compliment her.  I thought it was od but I thought she was his girl.
a week or 2 later in walkin down the stairs and I see the spanish mami kissin some guy and its not my son from chem class. so I ask her whats up and shes like the guy is her boyfriend and they been goin out for like a month. I said i thought u was with my son from chem class and shes like nah hes just a good friend. I was like

. Any way my son continued to simp

Fast forward to valentines day, I see dude from chem class in the hallway and hes has this big bag with candy, a small teddy bear, and a balloon. Im thinkin he got himself a girl and left spanish mami alone. So i follow him cuz i wanna see if his new girl is

.  Son walks up to this class room and spanish mami is standing at the door with her man.  dude gives her the bag. Shes says "Aw thank you" and gives him a hug and kiss on the cheek. her man hits him with the

, daps him up and says "thanks". then dude walks away with the biggest smile on his face word to

i couldnt believe i had witnessed that. had me feelin like

. Son has grown alot since then and I doubt hes still simpin that hard, but everytime I see him, in the back of my mind i always remember that day

Oh my....

Originally Posted by jumpmankb

My friend was coming home from the army after being in the middle east for more than a year and was having a HUGE party with all of our friends to celebrate his homecoming. I'm talking six kegs, hundreds of jello shots, t-shirt's with the party's name 

So anyway, I make it a priority to come home for this thing and drive from MD to NY for the weekend mainly just for this party. I knew that ALL my friends from highschool would be there and I was really excited I hadn't seen them in so long. I ask my old homies, who I hadn't seen in about a year, if he was going and he said he couldn't because "Katelyn" was having a beer pong tournament that same night. I was like, "dude are you serious?! You can see your girlfriend anytime. ALL our friends are gonna be reunited tonight." He said that he HAD to go. I ended up hanging out with him the day before the party and I was like, "so things must be serious with you and Katelyn if you can't go to the party." He replied, "well, we technically aren't together anymore, she told me she wants a break, but she wants me at her beer pong tournament so..." I gave him the 

these two stories are absolutely disgusting

pitiful pitiful excuses for men