Boy-Girl Friendships?

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

I want you to define friendship. For me it's being able to play ball, sit around talk about some b.s for no reason, being able to watch a movie with, in a fight they have your back and you can actually depend on them for something

Like I can't just punch a girl in the chest, and if I have any apprehensions about what may happen then I don't think we can be friends.
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....how old are you dude?
Same thing I was thinking when I read that, dude is like 14 tops.
 
She slept in the bed with another dude, who was her best friend.

I don't think anything happened because she said nothing happened, but I ended it off principle thats straight dis respect. I trust to a fault always havealways will but when in a relationship there is certain things that you don't do and thats one of them regardless of circumstances. The whole boy-girlfriendship isn't about trust so much as it is about respect to the relationship. Oh I'm over that incident put it in the past, we aren't dating nowbut you better believe I went on a mini rampage of chicks when I found out about the blatent disrespect.
 
Originally Posted by bboy1827

She slept in the bed with another dude, who was her best friend.

I don't think anything happened because she said nothing happened, but I ended it off principle thats straight dis respect. I trust to a fault always have always will but when in a relationship there is certain things that you don't do and thats one of them regardless of circumstances. The whole boy-girl friendship isn't about trust so much as it is about respect to the relationship. Oh I'm over that incident put it in the past, we aren't dating now but you better believe I went on a mini rampage of chicks when I found out about the blatent disrespect.
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Man if my girl pulled that I don't even know how Iwould react. I don't think I would retaliate but dang... I really don't know. You'll find better dude.
 
lol this isn't a help thread this happened months ago and I'm actually over it because if she did something and I'm willing to take her backeventually(not til I'm like 23 if I still know her) then she has to live with it, I haven't been a saint in the relationship either and since theincident it's been a wrap. This is just a problem that I have had, my best friends girl had a friend that they would spend the night over each othershouses since they were children, she ended up sleeping with him one time. This girl I know had a bf and she would stay at my apt with one of her"friends"(my roommate) and they ended up fooling around. I've never seen it work out some problem always seems to occur.
 
How would you feel if your significant other was kicking it with someone let's say once a week(because I don't know anyone that claims to be true friends and don't kick it) and they confided in the person over confiding in you, and anyone else of the same sex?


I have plenty of tried and true friends that I don't kick it with weekly or biweekly. We all busy and have things to do and when I see them it's alllove and vice versa. On the flip side, there are people that I see often that I wouldn't consider more of a friend than those that I don't see all thetime. So I think this is where some of the meaning of "friend" got misconstrued because just because you're defining "friend" based onthe frequency of hanging out which is quite different from a lot of people.

As for the second issue of confiding in that person over you, I think that issue has more to do with the comfort and communication between you and your partnermoreso than the other person that your partner is confiding in. Because if your partner was confiding more in a partner of their same sex, would it be anissue? Ultimately, while full and complete disclosure between two people in a relationship is ideal, I don't think it's something many couples have. Sometimes you have to vent to a third party. In some cases that third party will be of same sex, or of opposite sex. Your partner might want to sharesomething with a male friend in order to get an answer from a male's perspective.

Now the sleeping in a bed with another guy best friend? That might have been a little much....Because if the shoe was on the other foot? Yeah, she would beheated...
 
Once again a long winded statement that didn't' answer the question. I'm looking for a simple yes or no.

The confiding thign isn't about venting, friendship isn't about how much you hangout but thats a neccessary condition. I understand people have busyschedules I have a friend in Cali right now I grew up with and talk to him like atleast once every couple of days. Most of my friends are 1000 of miles awayand still find a way to 'kick it' with them no matter what because thats friendship to me. As stated I'm not going out of my way to kick it withpeople of the opposite sex for the simple fact I don't see the need, I don't know one married couple that has been married for a long time(more then 7years, thats a mark of successful marriage to me don't know why always thought if I can make it 7 even if we break up it was still a success) and oneperson in that marriage has a friend of the opposite sex that they kick it with all the time.
 
You can be friends with the opposite sex. (just another human-being with a vagina)

Jealously is a female trait. for reeal.
 
It doesn't matter, sleeping in the same bed with another guy is against the rules. That's playing with fire.
 
I have a lot of friends that are girls. I love em all...some I have hooked up with but it hasn't made anything weird. Female friends can come in realhandy a lot of times
 
I had a great relationship with a girl for 5-6 years with no smashing. She worked at a hair salon in the mall. Hooked me up with lots of girls at the Saloon.
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We would hang out talk about our relationships.
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talk about life. It was great.

I did end the relationship when I got with my last girlfriend. My ex was convinced the chick was in love with me.
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Like a fool I listened to my ex I ended the relationship with my friend. Myfriend Tiffany said to me your making a big mistake with this girl. "Don't come to me when your ex cheats on you." She was right.
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That's karma for you.
 
its not really a good look because if anybody feels attracted to the other person, then theres gonna be feelings involved.
 
It's perfectly fine and healthy to have friends of the opposite sex.

You're insecure, and have some growing up to do.

...and yes, I do think I'm a better man than you for feeling this way.
 
Lol I dont' think anyone in here has read my posts. K2 I'm glad you feel the way you do, when you can be cool with a girl that has cheated on you(notmy last ex. but a couple of ex's ago) then you come holla at me. the yes or no question I've asked sever times in this post is

Would you be cool with your girl hanging out with another guy all the time?

When people answer this simple question with a yes or a now I'll admit I'm insecure and being stupid but if you can't say yes and be honest, Idon't want a whole lot of bull about this and bull about that I want a yes or no black or white(Like I stated earlier). And I understand life isn'tblack and white, meaning life isnt' fair, but I try to make life as fair as possible.
 
Given that I have a friend who is a girl that I hang out with all the time, I can tell you with complete confidence that yes, I would be cool with a girl ifshe had a friend that she hung out with more than me.

I would also like to add, though, that I understand where you're coming from. I do make it a point to build a strong trust between me and a girl before anyfeelings are caught. I guess I kinda never have to worry about situations like yours because there's an established understanding. Likewise, I wouldn'tgive any girl the time of day if they weren't at least okay with me being friends and talking to my girl friend.
 
Originally Posted by bboy1827

I'm going to ask this one more time to Dirty, MyTMouse and anyone else that is on the opposing side.

How would you feel if your significant other was kicking it with someone let's say once a week(because I don't know anyone that claims to be true friends and don't kick it) and they confided in the person over confiding in you, and anyone else of the same sex?


When I made this post, I didn't consider that people called people that they kick it with every once in a while friends. I didn't consider that people put their friends that they see once a year in the same category as the normal people they see day to day, I don't do that so I didn't think other people did that. I'm not talking aqcuatiences I'm talking real tried and true friends, people that if you're not with you're girl or on your $+!, you are kicking it with them.

IDK what most people in this thread consider a friends, someone a can b.s with is cool, but that doesn't necessarily mean friend to me a true friend is a like a brother/sister someone that I can always be seen with, if they ran up at my job and started slapping people, atleast in public I would defend them. Friend has a deeper meaning to me then most of you I assume.


i personally do not hang out with my friends all the time...my bff lives in Atlanta for school and we talk on the phone all the time but when she's home wedon't kick much if at all...but i got her back and she has mine...my male friends are also at home so when i'm home we kick and text/talk some wheni'm not home...i don't have many friends at school...if he wants to kick it with her once a week thats cool cuz i know i'm not giving up myfriendships so i wouldn't expect the same from him...he knows whats appropriate...i can't control what they talk about but if i found out he wastelling her more than he was telling me i would be upset but i dont see how that would be any different than him telling his guy friends more than he tellsme...
 
Originally Posted by mytmouse76

Originally Posted by bboy1827

I'm going to ask this one more time to Dirty, MyTMouse and anyone else that is on the opposing side.

How would you feel if your significant other was kicking it with someone let's say once a week(because I don't know anyone that claims to be true friends and don't kick it) and they confided in the person over confiding in you, and anyone else of the same sex?


When I made this post, I didn't consider that people called people that they kick it with every once in a while friends. I didn't consider that people put their friends that they see once a year in the same category as the normal people they see day to day, I don't do that so I didn't think other people did that. I'm not talking aqcuatiences I'm talking real tried and true friends, people that if you're not with you're girl or on your $+!, you are kicking it with them.

IDK what most people in this thread consider a friends, someone a can b.s with is cool, but that doesn't necessarily mean friend to me a true friend is a like a brother/sister someone that I can always be seen with, if they ran up at my job and started slapping people, atleast in public I would defend them. Friend has a deeper meaning to me then most of you I assume.


i personally do not hang out with my friends all the time...my bff lives in Atlanta for school and we talk on the phone all the time but when she's home we don't kick much if at all...but i got her back and she has mine...my male friends are also at home so when i'm home we kick and text/talk some when i'm not home...i don't have many friends at school...if he wants to kick it with her once a week thats cool cuz i know i'm not giving up my friendships so i wouldn't expect the same from him...he knows whats appropriate...i can't control what they talk about but if i found out he was telling her more than he was telling me i would be upset but i dont see how that would be any different than him telling his guy friends more than he tells me...
co-sign. Dude is using extreme when he talks about the frequency of hanging out. Of course nobody is going to be okay with their significant otherhanging out with their opposite sex friends ALL of the time. But once a week is perfect acceptable.
 
Originally Posted by Lil Cao

Fix your damn run-ons
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Anyways, who's to say just because there's some sort of attraction, it voids any friendship? I met a girl in college whom I thought was pretty cute, but eventually it turned into a good friendship that I'm grateful for.
I hope your philosophy didn't deprive you of any female friends.
Pretty much. As far as me, it's all about trust. you gotta know your significant other's friends, whatever you do, you best not pre-judge.I've had female friends with guys sleep over, it's just a matter of trust. I am not one to break that trust and they know it...you just gotta knowwhich of one of their friends respects that trust too.
 
The greatest friendship I've ever had was with a girl. Sadly, it ended because her bf was jealous.... It's all good though. She married the guy, had akid and is living happily ever after. haha
 
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