Does everyone cheat in relationships?

[lyonbc1]

My boy and his girlfriend of over 2 years just broke up over this (both of them were "cheating" to some degree )smh....even worse is I live with both of them at school so its maddd awkward....but I'd break up w/ my girl with a bs excuse before I'd ever think about cheating on her...not worth all that and you'd prolly feel like crap afterwards 

 

[brasilianmami]

Originally Posted by Buc Em

I've probably #@#**% more girls with boyfriends than without.

this.
which is disgusting but females out here don't give one damn.
and dudes will be dudes.

simple answer to your question.
yes.

 

[keithsweatsjordans]

Originally Posted by JewSeeJay

jus had to tell my girl i had been cheating...

feels batman

she would never cheat on me though, if she did id be jus as devistated as she was and she knows id dead her instantly

were workin through things now and i got her a Kobe ring, so i think im gucci on the her tryna get "even" front

i thank god every day i got a good one, now

You do realize she's gonna question your every move now right? Not worth the hassle to me but to each his own

 

[dunks87]

I don't put anything pass anyone no matter how "good" or faithful they claim to be. EVERYONE I know has been cheated on or cheated. that's a sad fact. for this reason more so than others I refuse to get in a relationship. id never want to do that to someone I love but id never trust the person I love not to do it to me. meh. life.

 

[speakup23]

Originally Posted by jeenewed

You dudes are killing my faith in humanity.



But in my mind, if she actually loves you, she isn't gonna cheat.

My faith in humanity is looooong gone

 

[Remy LeBeau]

I look at it like this,
If you're willing to cheat on someone you're obviously in a relationship with someone you don't respect, which makes me wonder why you're in a relationship with someone like that in the first place. That's just me tho.

 

[jomitm]

Not true at all.

Never have and never will.

Do I get thoughts of plowing all these chicks? Hell yeah. All the time. Have I gone close? I'd be lying if I said I didn't.

But I got a keeper and I refuse to be a statistic, especially since the trust-level in my relationship is the type unheard of nowadays.

I've had my fun anyway and I decided I want to be committed.


I'm not gonna lie, it's pretty damn tough especially meeting and being around pretty and outgoing women, but it's not worth the BS.


Fellas, if you'd rather cheat, just be single. No worries, no rumors, and all the freedom you want and need.

Temptation is going to try to get you left and right, but the fulfillment of staying true to your word with a woman worth the effort is a feeling unbeatable by these ephemeral physical engagements.

 

[brasilianmami]

Originally Posted by SpeakUp23

Originally Posted by jeenewed

You dudes are killing my faith in humanity.



But in my mind, if she actually loves you, she isn't gonna cheat.

My faith in humanity is looooong gone

keep thinking that lenny williams, i just hope that, in that one time you aint giving her enough attention, she thinks she needs, and you walk in on her swallowing two meat sticks at once, that her love for you will help yall work things out.

 

[Gill Baka Esq. LLC.]

How can we generalize this notion of cheating on everyone? I mean if you think this way you should get cheated on. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy in these terms.

Sure alot of cheating people get exposed and get threads made about them but you gotta figure nobody hardly ever makes a thread about having a good one, rather its "HALP! girl problem" and "should I cheat on my girl"

You guys are screwing yourselfs over with this thought that everyone cheats, you go into a relationship with this mindset, keep the girls at arms length, never get to mature with her (if she potentially is a keeper) then you both are trying to get the upper-hand on the other on the side ("hehe this $*+## ain't gonna play me before I play her" attitude) and then %@+@ hits the fan.

What guys should focus on is developing that 6th sense of when %@+@ doesn't feel right. Some dudes have 2 approaches...they either enter in a relationship with their guard up which lowers after time or they go into the relationship with no guard and an open mind/personality...Truth is that men of all creeds, and type of guards get cheated on.

Why shoot yourself in the foot by playing these silly "1-up eachother" games. That %@+@ isn't a relationship. Far from it.

Within 2 weeks of constant dates, you should get a general picture of what type of girl she is and either qualify or disqualify her on that basis.

This believing the hype of generalizations we make especially here in General is really screwing with your heads.

JeeSee

on telling the truth but hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

 

[Smorgasbordgie]

Originally Posted by jomitm

Not true at all.

Never have and never will.

Do I get thoughts of plowing all these chicks? Hell yeah. All the time. Have I gone close? I'd be lying if I said I didn't.

But I got a keeper and I refuse to be a statistic, especially since the trust-level in my relationship is the type unheard of nowadays.

I've had my fun anyway and I decided I want to be committed.


I'm not gonna lie, it's pretty damn tough especially meeting and being around pretty and outgoing women, but it's not worth the BS.


Fellas, if you'd rather cheat, just be single. No worries, no rumors, and all the freedom you want and need.

Temptation is going to try to get you left and right, but the fulfillment of staying true to your word with a woman worth the effort is a feeling unbeatable by these ephemeral physical engagements.

I agree with all of this. Don't mess up a good thing for a cheap thrill. If your will is that weak, don't even bother being in a relationship.

 

[dwyanewadeog]

Originally Posted by Jking0821

This whole cheating thing is BS.

I used to be like all of you guys.  I actually broke up with my girl of 3 years because I was having urges to sleep with another female.  So i broke up with her to sleep with another girl.  Needless to say it would have been 100x easier to cheat on her apologize and keep it moving.  We are now getting back together after a year break.  As a man I never stopped loving her but I refuse to die with regrets.  Everything is a give and a take and you make calculated decisions in life.  But don't let society dictate what you "should" do.  

People have all these ideals about cheating is wrong because society tells you human's are a monogamous species.  Ignorance is bliss ask adam and eve. 

Cheating is inherently wrong because there is an implied "contract" between yourself and your partner to not violate each others trust.
If you were in an open relationship then of course sleeping with another person is not wrong because there is no "contract" about your behavior.

 

[koudie from brooklyn]

Originally Posted by WISEPHAROAH

Cheating is at an all time high because its a zombiehoepocalpyse out here. These females are heathens. They are swallowing and devouring so much man meat its borderline cannibalism. Its like the 60's free love movement with a ratchet twist. Make love to who you see fit but its the deception in the game that trips me out. Literally 95% of the women I have dated in the last two years have had boyfriends that I found out about eventually. I'm like the dude that women want to cheat on their man with and I don't get down like that. Chicks will call or text me with their dude in the shower or at work or in the next room playin 2k. I didn't realize how wild it was until I was single again. In all seriousness young girls are worse than dudes now.if you are under 25 and your girl is cute I PROMISE you at one point or another she was talking to another dude inappropriately via,text,facebook etc. Its too easy to cheat now. There are sooooo many avenues to flirt and spark convos with folks. Hell I think women are easier to get at when they are IN a relationship versus being single wherein they have free reign anyway. I stress to you that I do not talk to girls in any form of a "serious" relationship and I have an uncanny ability to sense when a girl has a dude even though they ALWAYS lie. 100% faithful girls are so rare its crazy. Even "good" girls test it out on the low.

After reading this i have nothing else to say. This man took the word straight out my heart. 

.. Same page bro, same page 

 

[chosen one]

I tried but the JO couldn't keep her mouth shut.

No regrets though.

 

[speakup23]

Originally Posted by DwyaneWadeOG

Originally Posted by Jking0821

This whole cheating thing is BS.

I used to be like all of you guys.  I actually broke up with my girl of 3 years because I was having urges to sleep with another female.  So i broke up with her to sleep with another girl.  Needless to say it would have been 100x easier to cheat on her apologize and keep it moving.  We are now getting back together after a year break.  As a man I never stopped loving her but I refuse to die with regrets.  Everything is a give and a take and you make calculated decisions in life.  But don't let society dictate what you "should" do.  

People have all these ideals about cheating is wrong because society tells you human's are a monogamous species.  Ignorance is bliss ask adam and eve. 

Cheating is inherently wrong because there is an implied "contract" between yourself and your partner to not violate each others trust.
If you were in an open relationship then of course sleeping with another person is not wrong because there is no "contract" about your behavior.

Exactly. That whole "People have all these ideals about cheating is wrong because society tells you human's are a monogamous species" is +%$#+@*$, because if youre not going to be monogamous, dont enter a monogamous relationship. Because its not fair to the other person who thinks that youre exclusive to them and vice versa, while youre out cheating with other people. Your partner might not share your ideals and its not fair and its wrong to !%!# with them like that.

 

[atlien seeko]

World is incredibly smaller than it used to be 50 years ago, via the internet. There are so many choices, and every day, you could find a new girl that is more "perfect" than the last. Also, marriage isnt nearly as vital as it used to be. People dont have to get married and have kids to run the farm in order to survive anymore. Monogomous relationships are cool to me, but I have to REALLY be feeling this girl. And I mean EVERYTHING about her. Like, without a doubt in my mind. I've been in a couple situations where I got a main chick, and still had my side dishes and they all knew about each other.

It also doesnt help that I live in Atlanta and dimes are too easy to come by... I'd probably have to move to another city if I got married. But then, like I said, if I got married, it would be to a chick that I have no doubts about, so maybe I wouldnt... Time will tell...

Just be honest with women if you dont feel like you can be monogomous. Usually only works like that at the beginning of the relationship though. I couldnt imagine telling a girl something like that mid relationship, but you never know... Just be honest.

 

[jkomorowski09]

i saw someone on here say ..


a man is only as faithful as his options.

i dont see it any other way now

 

[lyonbc1]

Originally Posted by carbon16

I look at it like this,
If you're willing to cheat on someone you're obviously in a relationship with someone you don't respect, which makes me wonder why you're in a relationship with someone like that in the first place. That's just me tho.

Preach

 

[keithsweatsjordans]

Originally Posted by LyonBC1

Originally Posted by carbon16

I look at it like this,
If you're willing to cheat on someone you're obviously in a relationship with someone you don't respect, which makes me wonder why you're in a relationship with someone like that in the first place. That's just me tho.

Preach

This is oversimplifying it though. Have you never lied to your parents/friends/loved ones? You must not respect them then

 

[wisepharoah]

I would like to clarify that I did not say ALL I said 95% which is not an exaggeration. I literally only know of two girls that were 100% single. Girls that told me they were going to marry and wanted to marry their dude still wanted to have sexual relations with me. I made a post about how I was at my homegirls house laying in the bed with her while she was on the phone with her dude and I had to use every fiber of my being not to put her on blast because she was trying to test me if I really wanted to hit. To the statement of "cheating was just as prevalent back in the day" I completely disagree and know this is false. Now don't get me wrong men ALWAYS cheated in high frequency but women would get socially cast out if they cheated or even flirted back in the day. I have conversations with older women all the time about how they view our generation of women and they are dumbfounded by how "sloppy" and "wild" they are. Our society is the most liberal its ever been in history so how you can compare the past to now makes no sense to me. Look at how many bi sexual chicks there are now. Ya'll have to be really sheltered to actually think these @+!%!* ain't getting down. Ask yourself, how many people do you know that have the resolve while in a relationship to deny someone who they think is better looking, more "successful", gives them more attention etc than their bf/gf and isn't going to cheat? Especially when the relationship hits a ruff patch which is a part of relationships. Now factor in the fact that even average chicks get hollered at atleast 10 times a week. Count in youth and immaturity and you have a recipe for disaster, hell some of your bestfriends and family wouldn't ride for you till the wheels fall off in this day in age so why would a female? Like I said honorable people in GENERAL are a rarity in our current paradigm. I do believe in true love and honor yet still but at some point you have to be realistic. True unconditional love outside of immediate family and the closest of friends is ultra ultra rare. You're naive if you think not.

 

[jewseejay]

Originally Posted by LyonBC1

Originally Posted by carbon16

I look at it like this,
If you're willing to cheat on someone you're obviously in a relationship with someone you don't respect, which makes me wonder why you're in a relationship with someone like that in the first place. That's just me tho.

Preach

i hate when ppl evluate ppl based on actions... there are no definites with ppl bruh... u lied, are you a liar? not nessecarilly... u may have jus had an overwhelmingly good motive... same deal with cheating... if its a single act done inhow are you gunna tell me that im alwayssss gunna be a cheater....

ive tried cocaine im not a coke head...

ive cheated on my girl... i love her dearly

  

 

[Gill Baka Esq. LLC.]

Originally Posted by WISEPHAROAH

I would like to clarify that I did not say ALL I said 95% which is not an exaggeration. I literally only know of two girls that were 100% single. Girls that told me they were going to marry and wanted to marry their dude still wanted to have sexual relations with me. I made a post about how I was at my homegirls house laying in the bed with her while she was on the phone with her dude and I had to use every fiber of my being not to put her on blast because she was trying to test me if I really wanted to hit. To the statement of "cheating was just as prevalent back in the day" I completely disagree and know this is false. Now don't get me wrong men ALWAYS cheated in high frequency but women would get socially cast out if they cheated or even flirted back in the day. I have conversations with older women all the time about how they view our generation of women and they are dumbfounded by how "sloppy" and "wild" they are. Our society is the most liberal its ever been in history so how you can compare the past to now makes no sense to me. Look at how many bi sexual chicks there are now. Ya'll have to be really sheltered to actually think these @+!%!* ain't getting down. Ask yourself, how many people do you know that have the resolve while in a relationship to deny someone who they think is better looking, more "successful", gives them more attention etc than their bf/gf and isn't going to cheat? Especially when the relationship hits a ruff patch which is a part of relationships. Now factor in the fact that even average chicks get hollered at atleast 10 times a week. Count in youth and immaturity and you have a recipe for disaster, hell some of your bestfriends and family wouldn't ride for you till the wheels fall off in this day in age so why would a female? Like I said honorable people in GENERAL are a rarity in our current paradigm. I do believe in true love and honor yet still but at some point you have to be realistic. True unconditional love outside of immediate family and the closest of friends is ultra ultra rare. You're naive if you think not.

But homie your naive in thinking that your own family and friends love you unconditionally.  I remember a discussion about this thought of unconditional and it just does not exist.  Everything is conditional.
In my own case i've come across 5 couples that have stuck together since we were in h.s. and that's like 10 years ago.  I think you dudes are perpetuating the thought of "rarity" of good females because all you mess with is scalliwags, no matter how proper they dress and talk a scalliwag is a scalliwag.

With this said, I don't want to make it seem like I haven't seen my share of failed relationships, but most of the ones i've witnessed didn't end because of cheating...moreso insecurity, mood swings, family, and other stupid reasons...and I live in nyc which is a mecca for all types of heinous stuff.

If I could give any type of advice to NT'ers reading this is that you really really gotta take all the stories and advice you read from this site or others with a BOTTLE of salt.  I don't take anything personally or anything that holds a substantial amount of weight when it's not first hand experience.  You can listen to advice, and use your rationale and judgement to determine the quality of the advice, but besides that you should go with your instinct/premonitions.  If it doesn't feel right, get rid of it.

JewSee your right when you say that one action shouldn't label you as something...in fact i'm against labels in general.  But when you say you cheated AND you love your girl...thats a stretch but i'm not in your shoes but from my pov you may love your girl...but like I hinted at before...your love is conditional...being that you found some finer P than you were getting and you jumped on it, then you prob found out that the girl you jumped on was lackin in some respect and you went back to your og girl.  If that's love then you done changed the game playa.

 

[Gill Baka Esq. LLC.]

Originally Posted by DwyaneWadeOG

Originally Posted by Jking0821

This whole cheating thing is BS.

I used to be like all of you guys.  I actually broke up with my girl of 3 years because I was having urges to sleep with another female.  So i broke up with her to sleep with another girl.  Needless to say it would have been 100x easier to cheat on her apologize and keep it moving.  We are now getting back together after a year break.  As a man I never stopped loving her but I refuse to die with regrets.  Everything is a give and a take and you make calculated decisions in life.  But don't let society dictate what you "should" do.  

People have all these ideals about cheating is wrong because society tells you human's are a monogamous species.  Ignorance is bliss ask adam and eve. 

Cheating is inherently wrong because there is an implied "contract" between yourself and your partner to not violate each others trust.
If you were in an open relationship then of course sleeping with another person is not wrong because there is no "contract" about your behavior.

I hear you when you say live life with no regrets, but in the sense your talking about...thats more like what killers say before they slash their victims throats rather than a person that is scared of sky-diving but does it anyways.
Even since humans had the ability to reason is when cheating in a relationship became wrong.  We're not animals anymore brew...some may act like it...but others still have morals and some type of decency...it may seem like a not so common trait nowadays but it still exists.  These type of people suffer though.  For their morals and integrity to do the "right" thing they sacrifice getting hated on, pushed to the side, and often disrespected because others think they have a "holier than thou" attitude.

It all comes back to this vicious cycle we play.  Every thread I go in that deals with male-female relationships...the vicious cycle is my only answer.  At the end of the day we all gotta live with yourselves and the things that we do to one another.  I feel like you did the right thing by breaking up with ol girl then going out with another girl, but your og girl would have taken it the wrong way no matter what. atleast you can say you didn't wrong her.

 

[keithsweatsjordans]

Originally Posted by JewSeeJay

Originally Posted by LyonBC1

Originally Posted by carbon16

I look at it like this,
If you're willing to cheat on someone you're obviously in a relationship with someone you don't respect, which makes me wonder why you're in a relationship with someone like that in the first place. That's just me tho.

Preach

i hate when ppl evluate ppl based on actions... there are no definites with ppl bruh... u lied, are you a liar? not nessecarilly... u may have jus had an overwhelmingly good motive... same deal with cheating... if its a single act done inhow are you gunna tell me that im alwayssss gunna be a cheater....

ive tried cocaine im not a coke head...

ive cheated on my girl... i love her dearly

  

Exactly. I know people who would say even yelling at someone shows lack of respect, so I guess every time a couple argues its the same as them cheating on each other? People need to realize any relationship between two people (and the feelings that form as a result) is a very, very complex issue. To try and make it as simple as "doing this means you MUST feel this" is ridiculous. It may be that way for you but its not even gonna be close to that way for everyone else

 

[north dade represent]

I don't know what kind of birds ya'll dealing with, but most of the girls I know would stay faithful to a dude if he's handling his business.

 

[mostofthetime]

i don't.