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the thread about nothing...
- Thread in 'General' Thread starter Started by Renaldo Balkman,
- Start date
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Dankenstein, I think it was just a rant from Uncle Phil for comedic effect. I seriously doubt anything like that was going on. (I'm so mad I answered that question like it's that serious but whatever lol). And man....F Tebow.
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That first fight :x The knees he could have put in the other dude's face at one point and just didn't
Old man was hilarious!
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What's good, my TANners? Like I said, I'll be throwing my random ******** in here when I feel like it. Today's tarducation is on the important topic of zombie apocalypse partners, what qualities they have, and whether my current would be a good one or not.
http://undermyfitted.blogspot.com/2012/10/a-girlfriend-for-end-of-world.html
Like a lot of other people, I'm a fan of "The Walking Dead". In case you somehow have no idea what that is (despite obviously having the internet), it's a series following a group of people as they try to survive both the zombie apocalypse and each other. It gets me to thinking about the possibilities if something like that were to happen in real life. Of course, I'd need supplies like guns, ammo, a silent weapon that doesn't run out of bullets (knife, machete, bat, etc.), a little food, and a first aid kit...but those are all pretty obvious to anybody who thinks about it for 5 seconds.
No, what I often think about is who would be my companion in this disaster? A life lived in total solitude (and sexlessness) isn't really worth living, in my opinion. If I didn't have anything to live for and with in a setting when plain old death is one of the best things that could realistically happen to you, I'd only need to bring one bullet for myself. Therefore, I'd probably require a lovely female assistant to help me through these troubled times...and even though I clearly love her, I wasn't sure my current tag-team partner is the best woman for the job.
Naturally, most of the traditional qualifiers like Attractiveness and Measurables go right out the window at a time like this. Picking a partner here is way more function than form, as the zombies think supermodels taste the same as regular women...worse, if anything, being far less fatty and all. Anyway, I thought about it from a semi-logical perspective, and here's what
I've come up with as the traits such a chick would need to have (and of
course, whether she measures up).
more
-Logic. The ideal girlfriend for a zombie apocalypse is a woman of sound, rational mind. She would be able to make tough decisions, as long as there was some balance between emotional input and what made sense. Of course, such women are about as common as solar eclipses. Most women, including my own, would be more likely to grab a bunch of photo albums and personal artifacts when the news hit instead of more things of actual use.
It would piss me off something fierce to open a bag that should be filled with shotgun shells and crossbow bolts to find a bunch of shots of her family vacation down by the lake and her childhood teddy bear. I like all my Cowboys **** too, but if it has to stay so extra rations can go...well, I'll still be wearing one last piece of merchandise on my head. I'm prepared to make choices like that...I'm not sure she is.
-Cardio. The ideal partner also has a degree of athletic ability. You might find yourself running for your life a time or two, and it's bad business to be with a woman who filed her nails and gossiped during gym class at the time. Shannon is a lot of adjectives...cute, loving, honest, trustworthy, supportive...but "athletic" isn't really one of them. She already complains that I walk too fast, and although in her defense, I do take fairly large steps (being 6'4" and all), this likely also means that I will run away from flesh-eating monsters a bit too quickly for her pace too. This may cause a misunderstanding at some point.
-Aim. It goes without saying that she will need to handle a firearm (well) at some point. An ideal partner would be somewhat comfortable with this. You don't exactly have a bunch of spare bullets lying around, so on-the-job training isn't the best thing in the world...some experience is preferred. I'm pretty sure my current titleholder has never even touched a gun, and I'm very sure she couldn't hit the broad side of a barn from the inside of it. Again, not the best thing in the world.
-Manual Labor. Building shelters, gathering firewood, fixing vehicles...these are all things that will require some effort. The zombie apocalypse is no place for a prissy little diva (well, besides as bait). To her credit, I believe my lady is willing to get her hands dirty and help out a bit. She's also fairly strong for a chick (I actually have to work a little to lock in that Sharpshooter when we're playing around), which will come in very handy when theire's a 2-man job and only one man. Both of these are essential for a dystopian girlfriend.
-Cooking. Say what you want, but no matter what happens, you'll need to eat. Those MREs you looted from a local army supply store won't last forever, so eventually somebody's gonna have to hook a squirrel up. It won't be me. I love her cooking, and have total faith that she could make a raccoon taste pretty okay. Score one for the yellow girl.
-Loyalty. Loyalty means that you won't wake up one day and find her and all your supplies gone. Loyalty means that if you trip while fleeing a herd of walkers, she'll at least look back for you to see if it's okay to just keep running (and didn't trip you in the first place). Loyalty means you won't get separated for a while and come back to find her pregnant by your best friend (ain't that right, Ricky?). I'm as sure as possible that I can trust Shannon in these areas.
-Worst-Case Scenario. Hey, it happens. Everybody has a plan 'til they get bit in the face. Despite your best laid plans, it may come to pass that one of y'all might get gnawed on. Once that happens, it's an absolute wrap. No ifs, ands, or buts...every single depiction of zombies ever explicitly shows that once you're bitten, you are irreversibly ******.
For that reason, I want a woman who will put me down immediately so I don't wander the earth forever suspended between life and death, feeding on human flesh (and they don't anatomically discriminate either...I don't want there to even be a chance I will ever eat a ****) and rotting grotesquely, and she can't have a problem with me doing the same. I just can't with the whole thing where people still interact with their zombifying loved ones, calling their names and asking if they're okay and all that stupid **** while the person is growling and biting and carrying on. Just do it already, damn. No reason both of you have to die because you wanted to be sentimental with a zombie.
I personally am very fond of my girl, but the moment she turns I will have no qualms whatsoever about parking a slug right between her pretty brown eyes. Hell, if shooting somebody in the ******g face was temporary and relatively harmless, I'd have done it to her in real life already. I assume the same is true from her end, so she wouldn't have any problems ending my nightmarish afterlife either.
I thought about it long and hard, and honestly I'm still not sure if she's an apt choice in this particular fictional (for now) scenario. Out of those 7 very crucial concepts, she only has a rating of "proficient" or higher in 3 with a respectable rating in a fourth. (I hope you, using this, can find someone more ideal.) I'm saying tho...the 3 I wouldn't pick her first on are pretty damn important too It's 3.5 vs. 3.5, how am I expected to break the tie so easily with such a tough call? Then again, she is the mother of my kid, so I might be under some kind of obligation. Plus I do love the girl...that's half a reason, I guess.
Dammit.
http://undermyfitted.blogspot.com/2012/10/a-girlfriend-for-end-of-world.html
Like a lot of other people, I'm a fan of "The Walking Dead". In case you somehow have no idea what that is (despite obviously having the internet), it's a series following a group of people as they try to survive both the zombie apocalypse and each other. It gets me to thinking about the possibilities if something like that were to happen in real life. Of course, I'd need supplies like guns, ammo, a silent weapon that doesn't run out of bullets (knife, machete, bat, etc.), a little food, and a first aid kit...but those are all pretty obvious to anybody who thinks about it for 5 seconds.
No, what I often think about is who would be my companion in this disaster? A life lived in total solitude (and sexlessness) isn't really worth living, in my opinion. If I didn't have anything to live for and with in a setting when plain old death is one of the best things that could realistically happen to you, I'd only need to bring one bullet for myself. Therefore, I'd probably require a lovely female assistant to help me through these troubled times...and even though I clearly love her, I wasn't sure my current tag-team partner is the best woman for the job.
Naturally, most of the traditional qualifiers like Attractiveness and Measurables go right out the window at a time like this. Picking a partner here is way more function than form, as the zombies think supermodels taste the same as regular women...worse, if anything, being far less fatty and all. Anyway, I thought about it from a semi-logical perspective, and here's what
I've come up with as the traits such a chick would need to have (and of
course, whether she measures up).
more
-Logic. The ideal girlfriend for a zombie apocalypse is a woman of sound, rational mind. She would be able to make tough decisions, as long as there was some balance between emotional input and what made sense. Of course, such women are about as common as solar eclipses. Most women, including my own, would be more likely to grab a bunch of photo albums and personal artifacts when the news hit instead of more things of actual use.
It would piss me off something fierce to open a bag that should be filled with shotgun shells and crossbow bolts to find a bunch of shots of her family vacation down by the lake and her childhood teddy bear. I like all my Cowboys **** too, but if it has to stay so extra rations can go...well, I'll still be wearing one last piece of merchandise on my head. I'm prepared to make choices like that...I'm not sure she is.
-Cardio. The ideal partner also has a degree of athletic ability. You might find yourself running for your life a time or two, and it's bad business to be with a woman who filed her nails and gossiped during gym class at the time. Shannon is a lot of adjectives...cute, loving, honest, trustworthy, supportive...but "athletic" isn't really one of them. She already complains that I walk too fast, and although in her defense, I do take fairly large steps (being 6'4" and all), this likely also means that I will run away from flesh-eating monsters a bit too quickly for her pace too. This may cause a misunderstanding at some point.
-Aim. It goes without saying that she will need to handle a firearm (well) at some point. An ideal partner would be somewhat comfortable with this. You don't exactly have a bunch of spare bullets lying around, so on-the-job training isn't the best thing in the world...some experience is preferred. I'm pretty sure my current titleholder has never even touched a gun, and I'm very sure she couldn't hit the broad side of a barn from the inside of it. Again, not the best thing in the world.
-Manual Labor. Building shelters, gathering firewood, fixing vehicles...these are all things that will require some effort. The zombie apocalypse is no place for a prissy little diva (well, besides as bait). To her credit, I believe my lady is willing to get her hands dirty and help out a bit. She's also fairly strong for a chick (I actually have to work a little to lock in that Sharpshooter when we're playing around), which will come in very handy when theire's a 2-man job and only one man. Both of these are essential for a dystopian girlfriend.
-Cooking. Say what you want, but no matter what happens, you'll need to eat. Those MREs you looted from a local army supply store won't last forever, so eventually somebody's gonna have to hook a squirrel up. It won't be me. I love her cooking, and have total faith that she could make a raccoon taste pretty okay. Score one for the yellow girl.
-Loyalty. Loyalty means that you won't wake up one day and find her and all your supplies gone. Loyalty means that if you trip while fleeing a herd of walkers, she'll at least look back for you to see if it's okay to just keep running (and didn't trip you in the first place). Loyalty means you won't get separated for a while and come back to find her pregnant by your best friend (ain't that right, Ricky?). I'm as sure as possible that I can trust Shannon in these areas.
-Worst-Case Scenario. Hey, it happens. Everybody has a plan 'til they get bit in the face. Despite your best laid plans, it may come to pass that one of y'all might get gnawed on. Once that happens, it's an absolute wrap. No ifs, ands, or buts...every single depiction of zombies ever explicitly shows that once you're bitten, you are irreversibly ******.
For that reason, I want a woman who will put me down immediately so I don't wander the earth forever suspended between life and death, feeding on human flesh (and they don't anatomically discriminate either...I don't want there to even be a chance I will ever eat a ****) and rotting grotesquely, and she can't have a problem with me doing the same. I just can't with the whole thing where people still interact with their zombifying loved ones, calling their names and asking if they're okay and all that stupid **** while the person is growling and biting and carrying on. Just do it already, damn. No reason both of you have to die because you wanted to be sentimental with a zombie.
I personally am very fond of my girl, but the moment she turns I will have no qualms whatsoever about parking a slug right between her pretty brown eyes. Hell, if shooting somebody in the ******g face was temporary and relatively harmless, I'd have done it to her in real life already. I assume the same is true from her end, so she wouldn't have any problems ending my nightmarish afterlife either.
I thought about it long and hard, and honestly I'm still not sure if she's an apt choice in this particular fictional (for now) scenario. Out of those 7 very crucial concepts, she only has a rating of "proficient" or higher in 3 with a respectable rating in a fourth. (I hope you, using this, can find someone more ideal.) I'm saying tho...the 3 I wouldn't pick her first on are pretty damn important too It's 3.5 vs. 3.5, how am I expected to break the tie so easily with such a tough call? Then again, she is the mother of my kid, so I might be under some kind of obligation. Plus I do love the girl...that's half a reason, I guess.
Dammit.
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i told her to just catch a flight to come see meMom dukes really put 60k miles on a car in 2 years
You got me bruh
Saw this on the AJC website, the two guys in the car made it out alive, but seriously injured. The driver's dad just bought him the car last week.
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i told her to just catch a flight to come see meMom dukes really put 60k miles on a car in 2 years
You got me bruh
Saw this on the AJC website, the two guys in the car made it out alive, but seriously injured. The driver's dad just bought him the car last week.
That car is detroyed
I'm shocked they made it out alive.
jbpkickz
Banned
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amazing
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i told her to just catch a flight to come see meMom dukes really put 60k miles on a car in 2 years
You got me bruh
Saw this on the AJC website, the two guys in the car made it out alive, but seriously injured. The driver's dad just bought him the car last week.
How does that happen???
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amazing
How much thime did she keep the braces?
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^How old was the driver? From what I understand Ferraris are notorious for burning up.
Don't you just hate it when you're not hungry at your lunch time, but you know damn well you'll be hungry later??? Hate that ****....
Don't you just hate it when you're not hungry at your lunch time, but you know damn well you'll be hungry later??? Hate that ****....
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my girlfriend would straight get me murked in a zombie apocalypse.
remember this?
remember this?
whyhellothere
Banned
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^Mine too, bruh.
How in the name of everything that makes sense did they survive that wreck? :x
How in the name of everything that makes sense did they survive that wreck? :x
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Article from the Ferrari crash: http://www.ajc.com/news/news/local/two-badly-hurt-when-ferrari-crashes-and-burns-in-a/nShLf/
Driver is18, Passenger is 21
They ran off the road and the car burst into flames.
Driver is18, Passenger is 21
They ran off the road and the car burst into flames.
jbpkickz
Banned
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stripe
Banned
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son...wow. wow.
You got me bruh
Saw this on the AJC website, the two guys in the car made it out alive, but seriously injured. The driver's dad just bought him the car last week.
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so got damn hard.
tell me you got this joint bruh.
if not, listen to this..
http://niketalk.com/t/338865/what-song-are-you-listening-to-right-now/520_20#post_16463903
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you dudes will listen to anything..
more power to ya'll though.. if ya'll like it then i love it.
more power to ya'll though.. if ya'll like it then i love it.
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I didn't want to be "da hata" so I'll just rep you and keep it moving
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there's sooo much music out there. I like the ignorant hood **** as much as I love everything else (except country... just can't do it).
I'm listening to The Lonely Heart's Club Band album again I hate everything else the Beatles ever made but this album is speaking to me.
@ da hata
I'm listening to The Lonely Heart's Club Band album again
I hate everything else the Beatles ever made but this album is speaking to me. @ da hata
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This *****'s name is Ice Cold Perm??!?
Really???
Really???
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Im just mad that dude has a Chanel blazer and a ton of gold with jacked teeth. Looks like Jerome from Martin
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All I suggest is play "All Gold Everything" in the whip. Image, lyrics, and any other detraction aside, that song bangs in the whip.
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