the thread about nothing...

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dont know where else to post this or let this out where someone might care.....but i just need to say....i cant deal with the stress, the past traumas....the not having any family.....the being alone, which a dead end job, with a record.....cant get past the day to day life, cant get past the paycheck to paycheck life.......what i mean to say is if it wasnt for my 9 year old daughter......i would just take like 20 xans and 10 percs and just go to sleep and never wake up.....im tired of surviving while everyone else is living.....im tired of being broke but never missing a beat at my job.....im tired of not being enough for my family that since i was 16 they kicked me out and told me im a man to figure it out on my own.....i cant get over how my dad never cared to know who i was but knows who i am and where i work cause were in the same industry.....loneliness has a sound and its getting louder and louder by the minute.....depression has a voice and its starting to mock me.......i cant do it cause of my daughter but i wish i could just quit already and atleast rest since ive lost all hope of ever living instead of surviving, scratching and clawing through life......i dont expect this to get too much attention and more or a "cry wolf" / "attention seeking" post.....but **** life man....
 
dont know where else to post this or let this out where someone might care.....but i just need to say....i cant deal with the stress, the past traumas....the not having any family.....the being alone, which a dead end job, with a record.....cant get past the day to day life, cant get past the paycheck to paycheck life.......what i mean to say is if it wasnt for my 9 year old daughter......i would just take like 20 xans and 10 percs and just go to sleep and never wake up.....im tired of surviving while everyone else is living.....im tired of being broke but never missing a beat at my job.....im tired of not being enough for my family that since i was 16 they kicked me out and told me im a man to figure it out on my own.....i cant get over how my dad never cared to know who i was but knows who i am and where i work cause were in the same industry.....loneliness has a sound and its getting louder and louder by the minute.....depression has a voice and its starting to mock me.......i cant do it cause of my daughter but i wish i could just quit already and atleast rest since ive lost all hope of ever living instead of surviving, scratching and clawing through life......i dont expect this to get too much attention and more or a "cry wolf" / "attention seeking" post.....but **** life man....
You’ve already taken a big step forward by talking about those issues, that’s something to be proud of.
It sounds like you definitely need help from a psychiatrist, which is nothing to be ashamed of.

In the meantime, simply talking about your mental health with others will already put you on the path to recovery. Aside from NT, I’d recommend also having such conversations irl with whoever you’re most comfortable with.

The recovery process will be long and difficult but you’ll get there, it just takes time.
 
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