The concept of (having) a 'Main', 'Side piece(s)' & 'Jumpoffs'

[brandonb2005]

yungmatt wrote:

---

eNPHAN, i gotta be honest with you bruh, it sounds like you have found "the one" and now your putting your blinders on about all women simply because you think your chick can do no wrong.

Ive met plenty of dudes like you in my lifetime and theres no debating with you guys

Originally Posted by 5iveonit

yungmatt wrote:

---

DO NOT be fooled by a females reasoning for being loose... IMO its all about having low self esteem... Not what happened to them in the past or whatever.

I know a female whos close to a dime and still her self esteem is lower than anything,yet she still runs thru like 4-5 relationships a year having sex with every one with no problem... Forcing herself to believe that the dude is really into her when hes only into her looks. Then when it dies out she makes up an excuse that makes no sense as to why it didnt work out.Are the dudes to blame???Hell no, shes getting herself hurt and lowering her self esteem more and more.

right....forcing herself to believe dude is into her....when he's only into her looks...maybe because she is his "main"...and she's under the assumption that they are in a monogamous relationship...especially since he's telling her that....

4-5 relationships a year, right? trace it back to the first dude who did her dirty and made her say "never again, i'm just gonna keep it casual"

Perfect example of what im talking about when I say you have blinders on.... Use your head for a second.... If a chick is in 4-5 relationships a year thinking shes the main chick,how much time does it take for her to think that??? 2-3 months at the most

.... If shes smart shell know to take her time liking a dude.

Just off that you should be able to tell she got low %## self esteem and shes acting out...That @#$+ dont have nothing to do with her getting hurt in the past...Why the hell would she keep doing it over an over

Yo matt its no talking this guy...he is extremly BLIND if Jesus touched eyes he will still be blind.

or

Maybe he does have a down %+% chick he is down for him and whatever he wants to do...

I just dont see where he is coming from because every time I respond he puts words in mouth and he use horrible examples.

I'm not the loving type of dude he cares all about a females feelings when i 1st start talking to her, I'm sorry because I would be lying if I said Idid. She has to earn trust and respect ...and untill she does Imma do me. I dont know where you from but I'm not going to put myself out there for a femaleunless I love her. And I only love myself and my family, and friends for the moment.

So all that loving and handcuffing chicks talk isn't riding with anybody smart when it comes to females.

 

[retrojtino]

If I got a main, which I do, she's the one and only. My loyalty and honesty in general are two things I take great pride in. That's just the wayI've been raised.

 

[harlemtothebronx]

I'm not the loving type of dude he cares all about a females feelings when i 1st start talking to her, I'm sorry because I would be lying if I said I did. She has to earn trust and respect ...and untill she does Imma do me.


Then what's the point of ever getting in a relationship? You gotta put yourself out there at some point. Relationships hardly start out with love.

 

[mytmouse76]

the idea of a main and side is stupid...

 

[chockiwi]

relationship=exclusive (No sides)
You want variety STAY SINGLE!

 

[jayfiend]

treewing wrote:

---

My relationship of three years ended in February and uuuh.... I'm done with relationships until i'm ready to settle down, which will be in like 10 years....

For now whatever happens, happens. I let girls that I'm dating know that I am not ready for another relationship and they understand that...

But to answer the question, hell no... If you're in a relationship, that's it. There should be no "side pieces" but if you're just dating then I believe that you are open to have options.

Easily the smartest thing said in this thread.

 

[obie21]

Originally Posted by RetroJTino

If I got a main, which I do, she's the one and only. My loyalty and honesty in general are two things I take great pride in. That's just the way I've been raised.

basically the way i feel. i take lots of pride in being loyal and honest, i got that from pops

never cheated, never felt the need to. im also not jumping into relationships with every girl that shows interest.
my main should be the girl i go to for almost everything. and it should work both ways
if not then i dont see the need to be in a relationship.

 

[jayfiend]

Originally Posted by apassionforshoes23

Originally Posted by Dirtylicious

no.
you can't give you all to a "main" if you know you have a backup.

a serious relationship involves taking a risk on that person...having a backup negates that risk.

Well put Dirty, well put.

Yes, well put.

 

[5iveonit]

Originally Posted by brandonb2005

yungmatt wrote:

---

eNPHAN, i gotta be honest with you bruh, it sounds like you have found "the one" and now your putting your blinders on about all women simply because you think your chick can do no wrong.

Ive met plenty of dudes like you in my lifetime and theres no debating with you guys

Originally Posted by 5iveonit

yungmatt wrote:

---

DO NOT be fooled by a females reasoning for being loose... IMO its all about having low self esteem... Not what happened to them in the past or whatever.

I know a female whos close to a dime and still her self esteem is lower than anything,yet she still runs thru like 4-5 relationships a year having sex with every one with no problem... Forcing herself to believe that the dude is really into her when hes only into her looks. Then when it dies out she makes up an excuse that makes no sense as to why it didnt work out.Are the dudes to blame???Hell no, shes getting herself hurt and lowering her self esteem more and more.

right....forcing herself to believe dude is into her....when he's only into her looks...maybe because she is his "main"...and she's under the assumption that they are in a monogamous relationship...especially since he's telling her that....

4-5 relationships a year, right? trace it back to the first dude who did her dirty and made her say "never again, i'm just gonna keep it casual"

Perfect example of what im talking about when I say you have blinders on.... Use your head for a second.... If a chick is in 4-5 relationships a year thinking shes the main chick,how much time does it take for her to think that??? 2-3 months at the most

.... If shes smart shell know to take her time liking a dude.

Just off that you should be able to tell she got low %## self esteem and shes acting out...That @#$+ dont have nothing to do with her getting hurt in the past...Why the hell would she keep doing it over an over

Yo matt its no talking this guy...he is extremly BLIND if Jesus touched eyes he will still be blind.

or

Maybe he does have a down %+% chick he is down for him and whatever he wants to do...

I just dont see where he is coming from because every time I respond he puts words in mouth and he use horrible examples.

I'm not the loving type of dude he cares all about a females feelings when i 1st start talking to her, I'm sorry because I would be lying if I said I did. She has to earn trust and respect ...and untill she does Imma do me. I dont know where you from but I'm not going to put myself out there for a female unless I love her. And I only love myself and my family, and friends for the moment.

So all that loving and handcuffing chicks talk isn't riding with anybody smart when it comes to females.



okay, and her being burned so many times in the past, and adapting brandon's EXACT SAME OUTLOOK ON LIFE, i.e. "i aint got no love for no dude, justme, my family and my friends" is a ridiculous notion?

at the point where the chick is in 4 or 5 relationships a year, she prolly gave up on believing monogamous men exist...

@blinders and putting words in mouths


handcuffing? so placing a label of "main chick" on a girl, and having a false pretense that she's the "only one" isn't handcuffing?


you making her your "main" and lying to her about being monogamous just so she wont bang other dudes isn't cuffing?

word?

you just said "if somebody else makes her happy, she can be with them"

what if you make her happy, but she needs a few "thicker" side pieces to give her the sexual gratification she feels you won't?

(if you havent recognized by now, i've posed this QUESTION to you like 4 times, and every time you've dodged it like a prude dodges money shots..)


talk about putting words in someones mouth an assuming, dude, i've done nothing but ASK you what your outlook is, specifically...and your responses,instead of answering my questions are

a.) you're blind

b.) stop cuffing and being loving

c.) you're putting words in my mouth

or

d.) i'm not trynna get banned by dirty...

moving on...

4-5 relationships a year thinking shes the main chick


i didn't assume she thinks shes the main chick, what i said is, she's prolly been hurt so much she said "f- it, aint no real men out here,everyone cheats....IMMA KEEP IT CASUAL"

therefore, she bangs whomever she wants...dates whomever she wants...and she "smashes like a boy".....

i don't think that's low self-esteem at all, in fact, i see it more like.....scorned...

a chip on the shoulder, if you will...

and it's the very same chip on the shoulder that a lot of men adapt.....especially those of you who "cheat just in case she's cheating"

 

[nawth21]

i have no idea whats going on in here anymore


cheatings bad mmmkay?

 

[fl0eticnostalgia]

nope...never have. whoever my man is--he is my main man. (while it lasts...)
and there is a difference between knowing you have options and actually using them.

 

[5iveonit]

Originally Posted by Nawth21

i have no idea whats going on in here anymore


cheatings bad mmmkay?

um, i'm arguing that men are more to blame for females being loose and wild...

they're arguing that it's a lack of self esteem....

they're also trying to justify why it's okay to cheat on your girl....

 

[alchemiss]

Originally Posted by 5iveonit

Originally Posted by Nawth21

i have no idea whats going on in here anymore


cheatings bad mmmkay?

um, i'm arguing that men are more to blame for females being loose and wild...

they're arguing that it's a lack of self esteem....

they're also trying to justify why it's okay to cheat on your girl....

I agree with both sides. I don't think its okay to cheat on your girl in any situation.

But I also don't think guys are to blame for females being so loose and wild.. It really depends on the person.

 

[5iveonit]

Originally Posted by Alchemiss

Originally Posted by 5iveonit

Originally Posted by Nawth21

i have no idea whats going on in here anymore


cheatings bad mmmkay?

um, i'm arguing that men are more to blame for females being loose and wild...

they're arguing that it's a lack of self esteem....

they're also trying to justify why it's okay to cheat on your girl....

I agree with both sides. I don't think its okay to cheat on your girl in any situation.

But I also don't think guys are to blame for females being so loose and wild.. It really depends on the person.

i think the guys that are doing chicks wrong are more so to blame than "low self-esteem" or whatever other hogwash they're trynna blame for it...

i didnt say "guys are to blame for females being loose or wild"

i just think it's the leading cause....

 

[alchemiss]

Word maybe it is.. I suppose I always meet girls when they are already in that stage so not sure what caused it. I do believe though that a lot of females arejust freaks and want as much sex as possible, they just try to hide it more. And a lot of guys hold incredibly high standards for women so I see where you arecoming from.

 

[nawth21]

Ahh. Ok. Loose and wild women, complex issue. Those with low self esteem are more likely to be negatively affected by the wrong doings of.. men. Maybethey're influenced by their loose and wild friends, or even the media. Girls getting brainwashed these days

scratch that, both sexes are affected by themedia but thats neither here nor there

Don't get me wrong, the emotional distress that goes with emotional abuse/cheating/call it what you will is no joke, but that's no reason to just sayeff it and disrespect yourself like some girls do

 

[dathbgboy]

It aint if you a dude. Cause the fact of the matter is, like stated before, women always have options in the "just friends" clause. Even if u a dudeand don't even get buckets w/ ya options, u still in the wrong in the eyes of ya main girl. In the end it don't do anything but cause drama and stress.Trust, I know I just went through this and still am at this moment

 

[brandonb2005]

Okay eNPHAN and 5onit ... you must have hit your post count on the 1st name....

Its cool man, you do you and I'm going to do me....

Besides I will probably stop deciding to have sides if I find the right one...so far it hasn't been done so I will continue on with my theory and youcontinue on trusting females with your feelings and your heart...you are going to get hurt real bad one day I have seen it done!

 

[5iveonit]

Originally Posted by Nawth21

Ahh. Ok. Loose and wild women, complex issue. Those with low self esteem are more likely to be negatively affected by the wrong doings of.. men. Maybe they're influenced by their loose and wild friends, or even the media. Girls getting brainwashed these days

scratch that, both sexes are affected by the media but thats neither here nor there

Don't get me wrong, the emotional distress that goes with emotional abuse/cheating/call it what you will is no joke, but that's no reason to just say eff it and disrespect yourself like some girls do

hey, i never said i agreed with the logic, infact i think it's stupid and i criticize girls for it all the time...

however

that doesn't mean it isn't valid.

"all men are dogs, all men cheat, if i have a boyfriend, he's going to cheat anyway, why bother? i can just keep it casual....whats the point?"


i mean, dudes do the exact same thing once they get played by a girl they liked....

ole "she kissed jimmy at lunch time....

. M.O.B. I DONT LOVE NO GIRL,ONLY MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY BRO" type dudes...

then they wanna point a finger at a dude like me, who's respectable and who's word actually means something,and try to demean me by saying "oh, he's just cuffing" or "he's loving these #!!#" or "he's just blinded"......

because YOU ain't strong enough to be a real dude and pass up the box....you take those 20 minutes of pleasure and place them above your"main"....

that aint me...my word is my bond....NUCCCCCCKKKKKKKKAAAAAAAAHHHHHH


....aaaaand i'm out.

peace for the day my friends!

 

[chockiwi]

Alchemiss wrote:

---

Word maybe it is.. I suppose I always meet girls when they are already in that stage so not sure what caused it. I do believe though that a lot of females are just freaks and want as much sex as possible, they just try to hide it more. And a lot of guys hold incredibly high standards for women so I see where you are coming from.


^ Kinda piggy - backing:
When men say things like : freaks, closet freaks etc.
my ears kind of perk up because sometimes those kinda of words, when mentioned along side a female, have a negative connotation.
I kind of look at it like, women have the right to have a freaky side, be wild and adventurous, sexy etc.
Basically there's nothing wrong with a women whose in touch with her sexuality.
Yea some girls are sex fiends, love sex, can't get enough, and there are also guys that are the same way... so what?
It's like a guy acts that way and it's encouraged, and over - looked but when a female has been through a series of hurtful and un successfulrelationships and just wants to relinquish the reigns and have a good time, she's looked down upon...

 

[5iveonit]

yo, I lied.

I'm on the sk, or I'd quote you.

to set the record straight for the 100th time,

this is my girls sn....she gets mad when I "rape her account".....eh.

I'm only even going back and forth with you cause I be at work bored.

if you aint found "the one" why keep up the guise of "the main"?

you're like responding back, but avoiding my questions every time..."like talking to a wall"

these days, you never know if you found "the one" ever....certainly not in 3 years...

but what does it matter if you been slaying chicks the entire time until the time you figure out "the one" is "the one"?

and conversely, if she was doing the same.... I truthfully wonder if you would be upset..

like, would that automatically make her not "the one"? what happens if "your main" is doing her thing too?

I mean, pardon me if I offended you earlier, you took it as "a shot to your manhood", that's just in my nature to pun and use wit....my fault...

I'm seriously trynna see your logic...

when I was single, I had the same mindset....

I got love for me, my fam, and my peoples....

except I aint have no "main".....no chick I called "my girl" or none of that....I had slides...it was what it was....wasn't no pretenseof me being monogamous....none of that....

that's how I'm not understanding how you're operating in such fashion....

like you said, you do you...

I will do me.....

I'm just asking you hypotheticals because I'm curious how you would react...

you're literally taking them as insults...

you're saying "you love with your heart" etc.....

like its derogatory to have feelings for someone you've been in a monogamous relationship with for.....years....

that's cool man...I did the single thing....as a single....not as a couple, with chicks I cheated on...

imo, if you're slaying broads in the early stages of any relationship, let alone a chick you deem "main"....its never going to be a "theone" situation....

and if it is....its definitely tainted...if not to you...to "the one"....

which is why I ask you how you'd feel if the tables were turned...

I've always taken PEOPLES feelings into consideration....regardless of gender....

which is why, when single, I didn't lead the dopest chick I was smashing at the time into thinking we were together in any way....

but that's just me....

p.s. I'm blowed....have fun with the long response...lol

 

[i r andre]

Originally Posted by enyceking

i know not 1 female who would use the term box

You must not be from NY, I know plenty chicks that say box,
and judging by that broad you posted in the GF thread you don't know one female who knows how to control their eating habits.

 

[5iveonit]

....and EYE go hard?

lol

 

[vegasoner]

Fam I feel where ur commin from and see your logic...But i just cant seem to agree withit.

Jus a hypothetical question, What if you found out your girl was cheatin on you at this moment?how would u feel

wouldnt u feel like all that effort you put in was a waste and would you be upset at all the other (()) u missed out on threw out the course of yourrelationship

 

[ill w1lliam]

No if you put one on ice your setting up for failure with your main, so why even waste the time/effort/money/etc? If your someones main then that's itthere isn't no other and if there is then you shouldn't be with them.