70% of Divorces are filed by women. 90% of Child Custody cases are awarded to women.

[NToweG]

You cannot have an honest discussion about this, without discussing the breakdown by race. The title is misleading in regard to who has the higher percentages of divorce. Black women are not getting married at the same rate of White women, so obviously they are not going to be divorced at the same rate. However, in the situation of child custody, since you do not need to be married in order to have a child, those stats may swing differently.

If I were single, just as successful as I am now with the same resources in regard to having lawyers and such, I'd be looking for the FREE Black woman to marry that is either equal to, or of greater resources, than myself. Considering my politics, White women are completely off of the table, as are any other non Black group. My agenda is to marry Black, raise capital while being Black, then bearing Black children. I would also keep spiritual concerns up front. Does she believe as I do? That is the huge point in this day and age, and it is important to arrive at table with an idea of where both are coming from. This will eliminate a lot of headaches.

The last person any SMART man should want, is a woman that cannot carry her own, and then being subservient to him. That is not a wife, that is a slave.

One question & two statements.

Would you agree or disagree that your posts are biased due to your race?

Regardless of your answer, I AM NOT revising my initial post or title due to your quoted^ Opinion. It's more than just blacks and whites that fulfill those statistics. Hispanics, Filipinos, Samoans, Asians, American Indians, Alaska natives, & etc... That'll be unfair to break this topic down to the only two ethnicities you mentioned.

Let's please get back on topic and not be defensive because we all know who all played a role in derailing the subject in this thread. Theres a time and a place for certain discussions and I'm not about to go back and forward about it.

 

[Present]

 

[NToweG]

sorry for the long post but here is my take....I believe the 70% of woman are the ones who file for divorce but the fact that it's because men cheated I think is bs. I think in this day were relationships and marriage are taken so lightly people are so quick to say **** this and move on. I also think a new found independence for woman come in play where they are more self sufficient then they were lets say 20 years ago where they have this mentality that I don't need a man and can do **** on their own now I am sure they are a lot of scummy ones who will just take a guy for half and live off that but I think there are **** people on both sides. I have seen a lot of **** women cheat, men cheat and all that. I think the main problem is people rush into marriage especially young. It also goes back to a cultural thing I can speak to myself and say that as Latina woman growing up I was raised to have these expectations that by 25 I needed to have a steady home and marriage. The older I got and all the experiences I've been through have shown me I was insane. I am not the same person I was at 25 and if I had gotten married like I was supposed to because i was engaged to my daughters father we would have already been divorced. I would be 26 and a divorcee imagine that. Now to the other side of having kids I CAAAAANOT stress this enough to males or females please be cautious when picking out your child's parent because you are literally stuck with that person until you die even if you don't stay together. Marriage or no marriage nothing is a guarantee you will stay together. And its sad to say but the Court Systems are so ****ed when it comes to men they definitely favor the mom. I have seen some many good dads not have full custody or have to have a battle for joint just because judges favor mom. Its a flawed system for sure. That's why I stress the importance of picking out a good parent for your kid. I can speak from experience and tell you co parenting with a ****ty parent is literally the most draining thing in the world. I don't hate anyone in my life but if i could run over my BD i would in a heart beat lol.

Thanks for chiming in. This thread needed your on-topic point of view.

 

[KHUFU]

One question & two statements.

Would you agree or disagree that your posts are biased due to your race?

Regardless of your answer, I AM NOT revising my initial post or title due to your quoted^ Opinion. It's more than just blacks and whites that fulfill those statistics. Hispanics, Filipinos, Samoans, Asians, American Indians, Alaska natives, & etc... That'll be unfair to break this topic down to the only two ethnicities you mentioned.

Let's please get back on topic and not be defensive because we all know who all played a role in derailing the subject in this thread. Theres a time and a place for certain discussions and I'm not about to go back and forward about it.

That underlined question is quite comical.

I don't think that I've asked you to change anything in regard to your post, but if you think that the misogynist tone of some of these responses are okay, yet my response with race being in play as NOT being okay, speaks to something that you may want to Methodical Management about, then see if he indeed thinks that I am derailing this thread.

Cool?

 

[Hunnynutcheerios]

Thanks for chiming in. This thread needed your on-topic point of view.

No problem its what im here for sometimes you guys need a woman's perspective LOL

 

[NToweG]

I'm not about to go back and forward about it.

As we were ladies(lady) & gentlemen...

 

[KHUFU]

In this sort of discussion, race matters.

https://www.usnews.com/news/elections/articles/2020-02-14/the-state-of-american-households-smaller-more-diverse-and-unmarried

 

[wayniac211]

Now I don't believe you can be a good husband or partner if you are not in the right mind frame and are happy with yourself.

How are we (hubby/wife) suppose to be in the right mind frame with all this going on (covid/racial discrimination/unemployment/incarceration/mental health/pills/social media..etc)
Toughest job in the world to be a full time parent and spouse. .

 

[DCAllAfrican]

One question & two statements.

Would you agree or disagree that your posts are biased due to your race?

 

[TURBO UNO]

NToweG Hunnynutcheerios TunedAirLombardy

Thank you guys for adding to the discussion last night.

My question to you is as follows... How big a role does money have (lack of it) when it comes to divorce? I know that it definitely adds to stress of daily life once you add children to the mix and things get progressively worse shortly after.

 

[MakeNTGreatAgain]

People who know of my history on this forum know this is a mistake I once made

marriage , to a thot

never again trusting a female like i once did

i simped before, learned my lesson, my advice to fellow bros

women are heartless

why do u think she betrayed ur trust?

 

[rhinosport]

Toughest job in the world to be a full time parent and spouse. .

The good ones make it look easy.. . .

 

[KHUFU]

We gotta be Black when it is convenient Can’t make the model minority uncomfortable!

 

[Present]

Toughest job in the world to be a full time parent and spouse. .

Spoiler

 

[Hunnynutcheerios]

How are we (hubby/wife) suppose to be in the right mind frame with all this going on (covid/racial discrimination/unemployment/incarceration/mental health/pills/social media..etc)
Toughest job in the world to be a full time parent and spouse. .

I know that it is the worlds toughest job. And i understand everything in the world but i meant right frame of mind in taking care of your home life. Even with the world falling apart outside and my work life and anything else at the end of the day i have to be a good mother and partner that doesn't change ever. And i do it because i want to and don't find an excuse not to be.

 

[Hunnynutcheerios]

NToweG Hunnynutcheerios TunedAirLombardy

Thank you guys for adding to the discussion last night.

My question to you is as follows... How big a role does money have (lack of it) when it comes to divorce? I know that it definitely adds to stress of daily life once you add children to the mix and things get progressively worse shortly after.

I think it depends on the marriage. If the problems of your marriage derive from money issues then it plays a huge part. But that's why the beginning and foundation is the most important part. If you start of dating someone and you decide marriage is in the future then there are so many things you need to factor like how is everything going to be financially are you guys going to be splitting things, will both of you contribute evenly or will one be the sole provider. Also children do you guys both agree on kids or not. Sometimes people go into relationships and marriages "blindly" without discussing the important things and then once they are married find out they have opposing opinions and it wont work.

 

[wayniac211]

The good ones make it look easy.. . .

They fronting like a MF lol... most couples I see that have been married 40+ yrs are grumpy as ****.

For real dough
It’s so complicated all you can do is laugh..

 

[wayniac211]

I know that it is the worlds toughest job. And i understand everything in the world but i meant right frame of mind in taking care of your home life. Even with the world falling apart outside and my work life and anything else at the end of the day i have to be a good mother and partner that doesn't change ever. And i do it because i want to and don't find an excuse not to be.

Not many built like you. Lotta switching up going around in 2020.

 

[rhinosport]

They fronting like a MF lol... most couples I see that have been married 40+ yrs are grumpy as ****.

Grumpy because they’re old timers?
Or grumpy for being married that long?

Being married for that long, I’m sure their communication skills are on point! Straight telepathic!

 

[TURBO UNO]

Hunnynutcheerios , you are spot on. I had all those questions for my sister but never spoke to her about it since I did not want to interfere with her decisions. She had children with a man who didn’t want kids in the first place, was physically/verbal abusive, had little to no income, childhood trauma and abandonment issues. It only took 1/2 a year to see things crumble and still added a 2nd child to make things harder. Dude ended up starting another family with someone else adding 2 more children (4 total now) and is already cheating on his wife with video recording of his actions to boot. Now this guy has been forced to work by both mothers and he’s crying (literally) about child support taking all his money.

 

[wayniac211]

Grumpy because they’re old timers?
Or grumpy for being married that long?

Being married for that long, I’m sure their communication skills are on point! Straight telepathic!

You been married before?

 

[Hunnynutcheerios]

Hunnynutcheerios , you are spot on. I had all those questions for my sister but never spoke to her about it since I did not want to interfere with her decisions. She had children with a man who didn’t want kids in the first place, was physically/verbal abusive, had little to no income, childhood trauma and abandonment issues. It only took 1/2 a year to see things crumble and still added a 2nd child to make things harder. Dude ended up starting another family with someone else adding 2 more children (4 total now) and is already cheating on his wife with video recording of his actions to boot. Now this guy has been forced to work by both mothers and he’s crying (literally) about child support taking all his money.

I'm sorry to hear that about your sister. It's unfortunate sometime that we shy away from difficult conversations with friends and families. But also i've learned from experience that most people especially me are head headed and need to learn things the hard way. Ive had my parents give me advice growing up because they saw things and wanted certain things to turn out different but i needed to make those mistakes to learn on my own and guide myself.

 

[onthenephs]

People never been married, talking shhhhh about being married- you have no clue what you’re talking about and really at the bottom of all your feelings you’re afraid. From whatever you want to be- divorce- cheating, theft , trust all the million things that you use to justify not being married. It’s like anything in life an experience, works for some not for others.

people who’ve never had kids talkin shhhh about kids- you have no idea what you’re talking about. Your friends story don’t matter, ur story don’t matter. Again like all other expieriences in life, works for some not for others.

key is smoke some weed, relax, live your life with the experiences you want. Ain’t no stats to getting married that’s some straight America view of society. Ain’t no stats to having custody of ur kids. It’s all bs

 

[Hunnynutcheerios]

People never been married, talking shhhhh about being married- you have no clue what you’re talking about and really at the bottom of all your feelings you’re afraid. From whatever you want to be- divorce- cheating, theft , trust all the million things that you use to justify not being married. It’s like anything in life an experience, works for some not for others.

people who’ve never had kids talkin shhhh about kids- you have no idea what you’re talking about. Your friends story don’t matter, ur story don’t matter. Again like all other expieriences in life, works for some not for others.

key is smoke some weed, relax, live your life with the experiences you want. Ain’t no stats to getting married that’s some straight America view of society. Ain’t no stats to having custody of ur kids. It’s all bs

High key agree with the smoke weed with your partner and relax and live life

 

[TURBO UNO]

Thank you Hunnynutcheerios

It’s funny you mention stubbornness. My sister was told by many of her friends to stay away from him not only because of how he acted but also because he was kinda still in a relationship with someone else. Well, she decided to “lock horns” with the other woman and that girl stayed in the picture for most of her relationship with him. Many of us in the family did finally speak up but all that came from it was her claiming we were trying to control her life and that we weren’t letting her make her “own mistakes”. My cousin told her “Making your own mistakes is fine but at least make different ones”. It seems to be a vicious cycle for the women in my family tree. My grandmother was abused verbally/physically as was my mother, aunts, sister and cousin. I can’t help but be astonished by how they all had children with the same type of men.